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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not pay for invited guests siblings at my child's party?

58 replies

B1993 · 27/06/2023 19:46

I'm organising my son's 4th birthday party and a mum (from nursery that I don't know personally) said her child will be attending- after the RSVP deadline passed, might I add - but has asked if his sibling can come too as she doesn't want her to miss out.

Despite having missed the deadline, I don't want to exclude this child as he's my son's friend. But, I'm wondering if it's unreasonable to message back to say that the invited guest's sibling can come but I'd like her mum to pay for admission since she wasn't actually invited (in a more tactful way than this - any help on wording the response would be appreciated). I'd still make sure she had cake and would pay for this. I should add that, as the venue is soft play, paying for admission separately would mean she can still participate in the party with all the invited guests so she wouldn't be left out at any point.

Again, any help wording a reply would be great!

TIA

OP posts:
ladygindiva · 26/07/2023 08:50

Moonshine5 · 28/06/2023 00:51

I'm prepared to be flamed here but what if you paid for the sibling, in the spirit of it being a celebration. They may not have childcare available. I'm aware there's a CoL crisis however we are talking about one child. In this scenario I would be pleased my child s friend could attend and I would cover the sibling. Just saying.

This was an enlightening glimpse into the mind of a CF 🤣🤣🤣🤣

TulipCat · 26/07/2023 08:57

If your child isn't friends with the sibling just say no. She's going to have to get used to the fact that not every invite or activity is for all her children. Not wanting a sibling to "miss out" on a party for different kids isn't really workable once they're at school.

CoffeeCantata · 26/07/2023 08:57

God - the entitlement is unbelievable.

Why are parents so afraid of explaining to their children that they can't always have what they want? 🙄 'Doesn't want the sibling to miss out'.

Moonshine5 · 26/07/2023 09:04

I was offering to pay for the extra child.

Gateappreciation · 26/07/2023 09:21

Cheeky of the parent to ask. If sibling wants to go to play area, she can take both her children at another time.

Your reply was perfect explaining she can take him but will have to pay. However, as others have said, be careful she doesn’t drop both kids with you.

JenWillsiam · 03/08/2023 13:27

Moonshine5 · 28/06/2023 00:51

I'm prepared to be flamed here but what if you paid for the sibling, in the spirit of it being a celebration. They may not have childcare available. I'm aware there's a CoL crisis however we are talking about one child. In this scenario I would be pleased my child s friend could attend and I would cover the sibling. Just saying.

What?! Would you stand by that if you invited 24 kids and there were 16 siblings coming?

Moonshine5 · 03/08/2023 14:10

Lol

DrewHormordr · 18/02/2024 15:05

I don’t remember expecting to go to a party that only my sister was invited to. What a cheek! What if the invited kid has 3 siblings ? Do they all expect a freebie? I blame the entitled parents (whose kids grow up to be entitled too).

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