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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take baby to classes at 4 weeks old?

157 replies

elm26 · 19/06/2023 00:00

I've signed up for a 6 week course.

Each week is different from baby massage to baby first aid to tummy time and sensory.

It says anyone is welcome to bring their babies from birth but they recommend 4 weeks and upwards.

It says on the welcome pack that they are laid back and if baby is crying, needs feeding, changing etc it's all part of the group and we can do what we need to do.

I thought this would be a great opportunity to mix with other Mum's and get my baby involved in some developmental bits and bobs.

Told some friends who told me it's ridiculous I've paid £65 to take a 1 month old to classes that she won't gain anything from.

I'm a first time mum, DH thinks it's great especially as I would have never done this before as I don't like to go somewhere unfamiliar without somebody I know.

Should I cancel? I can get my money back if I cancel tomorrow latest. I'm questioning now whether it seems too much.

OP posts:
MummyJ36 · 20/06/2023 07:39

This is very individual and you must do what feels right for you! If you go to the class baby will likely sleep but the big thing is it gets you out the house, gets you meeting other mums and gets you into the world again.

As a first time mum it is easy to get isolated so if you feel physically ready then go to the class! It’s not like £65 is an extortionate amount either!

StillWantingADog · 20/06/2023 07:40

StillWantingADog · 20/06/2023 07:39

I doubt baby will get much out of it.

however I found getting out of the house doing stuff with the baby really important for my general well-being when on Mat leave

What I meant to say was if YOU fancy it, it’s all that matters.
baby might not be keen and cry a bit- mine did-so be be prepared for that

bryceQ · 20/06/2023 07:43

Definately go! The days can be long and lonely with a baby it gives you something to do. I did tons of stuff like this.

FeeFiFoFumble · 20/06/2023 07:46

Not everything you do has to be for the benefit of the baby. You're allowed to do things that you might enjoy too. Sounds like a really lovely way of meeting other new parents who are in the same boat as you!

I will say though that when I did classes with my baby we ended up missing half of them due to sickness / badly timed poonamis etc. But I really enjoyed the classes I did make it to!

Whoopsi · 20/06/2023 07:48

I think it sounds great - will be interesting, you’ll learn new things, it’ll get you out of the house and you’ll meet new people.

CrOuChEnDTiGr · 20/06/2023 07:49

It seems like your friends are extremely judgemental, I am assuming they themselves have never been to these classes?

I found baby massage to be extremely helpful. Mums I have stayed in touch with, people that are experiencing the same things as you at the same time, especially if you’re a ftm, teaches you great techniques to build into your bath/bed routine to aid better sleep, you will learn techniques to ease wind, better digestion etc…I found it entirely useful. On a couple of occasions I got there and baby slept but you can still listen to get the experience to do at home. Not a waste of time at all in my opinion.

I would say if you are able to afford it, do everything you can. We did swimming, sensory as well as a couple of other baby/toddler village hall type sessions. Great for meeting people, getting advice, gets you out and organised in the mornings when it can be terribly easy at this stage to not, especially as a ftm!

Goingthere · 20/06/2023 07:49

I started baby massage at around 5 weeks and found it was a lovely age. The other babies were probably 6-8 weeks when we started, so all very young.

Whatmeagain · 20/06/2023 07:50

Definitely go. I went to a free local authority one which sounds similar and it was great for tips as well as meeting other parents - ours was for mums and/or dads. Best thing I learned was in baby massage and how to massage if they were a bit constipated! We used that technique for years and it worked wonders!!!!

SaxSick · 20/06/2023 07:56

I wish there had been stuff like this when my first child was born!

northlife34 · 20/06/2023 08:11

Get yourself there! Will help you get into a routine and be able to meet other parents 🙂 will also be some nice bonding time for you and baby! The early days are the loneliest I found, so it would definitely do you good!

ActDottie · 20/06/2023 08:14

Your friend is right in that baby probably won’t remember anything BUT it’s not just about baby and it’s about you! Which your friend seems to have glossed over! Baby won’t care if they’re there or not but if you get to socialise and make friends with other mums then it’s totally worth it. Having a baby can be really isolating so doing things like this will be really beneficial to you so please go.

AndThenWhatHappened · 20/06/2023 08:18

I did it 🙋 thought I was losing my mind after a traumatic birth, baby with reflux and couldn't drive after emcs. It was seeing other mums and hearing them moan about the difficulties of becoming a new mum that made me feel human and like I wasn't failing. 100% made me feel better to have a reason to get dressed. Although I agree with others that say if you don't get on with it, or your DD hates, it you can pull out.

Congratulations OP, what a lovely time

bryceQ · 20/06/2023 08:18

Op if there are any baby cinema sessions near you, these were my favourite when baby was young. They play normal blockbuster films but you got a coffee and cake and it was bliss to do something "normal" once a week.

AndThenWhatHappened · 20/06/2023 08:20

Oh yes do baby cinema. I go every week with my DD. She's 9 months old now so more of a wriggly pain but we grab a coffee and some snacks and I get to see all the big movies while she sleeps at some point, win win!

Katela18 · 20/06/2023 08:26

Hi OP.

I did this when I had my second baby last year, I think he was 5 weeks. First baby was born prem so missed NCT and born in lockdown so I really had no chance to meet mums.

I'd say realistically your friends are right in that baby won't get huge amounts (although I wouldn't say they won't gain anything, I'm sure they will!). But in the first year I think these groups are really more for the benefit of mum. Being a new mum is lonely and often like ground hog day so it's good to have things to break up the week and a great way to meet others in the same situation as you.

Your friends should try and be a little more empathic, there is no need to comment negatively on this even if they wouldn't do the same.

Go, enjoy it, you'll probably find you benefit from it :)

LBFseBrom · 20/06/2023 08:28

Seems a bit pointless to me, they will be teaching nothing new or that you cannot read in a book. As for 'tummy time', isn't that someone does naturally with their baby without it needing a label?

The only advantage I can see is meeting other new mothers and you'll do that anyway as time goes on. Much more interesting to mix with people who have things other to talk about than parenthood.

FFF3 · 20/06/2023 08:31

As long as you realise you’re doing it for you and not your baby, then that’s fine! The baby will sleep throughout or be fed / you’re basically paying to make friends. But that’s how it works really.

dreamingoaholiday · 20/06/2023 08:33

Your friends are being arses.

And even though it benefits you, that doesn't mean it doesn't benefit your baby also.

It's not like you do one session of baby massage and that's it. At that session, you'll learn some techniques that you can use at home if you like, and so if your baby enjoys it, then that's a lasting benefit for them. Same for tummy time and sensory.

And on what grounds could anyone argue with learning first aid?!

Ignore them, they're being idiots.

seiwilks · 20/06/2023 08:36

Absolutely go! I started a baby massage course when DD was 4 weeks and I loved it - great way to meet other mums. Ignore your friend and enjoy ☺️

readingbluecat32 · 20/06/2023 08:42

I took my son to baby sensory and swimming when he was about the same age and we loved it. As a FTM it was great to meet other mums to know our shared experiences, I am still friends with them now and we all talk daily about the kids. Also it really helped me to get advice on how to play with my baby, about their development and how to help them (like separation anxiety and eye/ movement tracking). I gave me ideas for toys that he liked and taught me some baby massage (game changer when he had colic).
on top of all this - it gave me something to look forward to each week and I kinda structured my week around this appointment, it meant that if I was having a bad week I at least knew I would get one day / nice activity out of the house!

katepilar · 20/06/2023 08:44

The class is for you, not for the baby directly. It actually sounds great to help you be a confident mum with knowledge. Go.

Curtains70 · 20/06/2023 08:56

Is it Baby Bloom? I toom mine around that age and really enjoyed it. If you can afford it just go for it. Its all very relaxed.

Catspyjamas17 · 20/06/2023 08:59

I always thought you had to wait until they had all their baby jabs first.

StillWantingADog · 20/06/2023 09:35

Catspyjamas17 · 20/06/2023 08:59

I always thought you had to wait until they had all their baby jabs first.

I think this is an urban myth. I took mine to all sorts including swimming and i never recall a requirement that they have their jabs first. Of course some parents would choose to jab their children before going to baby groups but IIRC they didn't finish till 4 months ish which is a long time.

Mummab3ar2 · 20/06/2023 09:39

1st aid for baby would be worth the money for me by itself.

I'm pregnant with my second now, and I'm going to sign up to one of these classes. I did similar with my first, but not til he was a bit older, if it's the same as the classes by me, they move up classes to suit their age and development. My boy absolutely loved them. I will start earlier this time though as definitely worth it.

It's lovely for baby, but it's more about you and what you get from it in early days. Hopefully you'll find some new friends there who will be more supportive and of similar mindset as you.

Hope you enjoy the classes and don't let people sway you from nice things you want to do with your baby. Mum guilt is hard enough to deal with anyway, making you question all your decisions, you don't need extra doubt on top x