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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take baby to classes at 4 weeks old?

157 replies

elm26 · 19/06/2023 00:00

I've signed up for a 6 week course.

Each week is different from baby massage to baby first aid to tummy time and sensory.

It says anyone is welcome to bring their babies from birth but they recommend 4 weeks and upwards.

It says on the welcome pack that they are laid back and if baby is crying, needs feeding, changing etc it's all part of the group and we can do what we need to do.

I thought this would be a great opportunity to mix with other Mum's and get my baby involved in some developmental bits and bobs.

Told some friends who told me it's ridiculous I've paid £65 to take a 1 month old to classes that she won't gain anything from.

I'm a first time mum, DH thinks it's great especially as I would have never done this before as I don't like to go somewhere unfamiliar without somebody I know.

Should I cancel? I can get my money back if I cancel tomorrow latest. I'm questioning now whether it seems too much.

OP posts:
DifficultBloodyWoman · 19/06/2023 04:04

Baby classes are not for babies, they are for the parents. They exist to either make money or get mums out of the house fora break.

LittleBearPad · 19/06/2023 04:27

Your friend is unkind. I’d ignore her.

Murdoch1949 · 19/06/2023 04:43

I think it sounds like a brilliant idea. My babies loved baby massage and found it very soporific.

AverageJoan · 19/06/2023 04:48

I have been taking my LO to sensory since she was 4 weeks old. I didn't think she would get much from the first few sessions but she was always pretty engaged and she never slept through one!

Whatifthegrassisblue · 19/06/2023 05:07

Baby classes are great for cognitive development, there's scientific research on this. I'd say your friends are just projecting their own insecurities as they probably never made an extra effort with their children. (That or older and think everything is a waste of time because its something new to them 🙄, so be prepared I'm sure there is more to come. I had family members like this). Ignore them!
4 weeks is quite young, but I do recall some very little babies when I took mine to baby sensory and they all get different things out of it depending on the age. Like PP mine never fell asleep, they were very alert at a young age. If yours does fall asleep, who cares. Good for you too so you can meet new people and get out of the house. Win-win 🙂

pinkhousesarebest · 19/06/2023 05:16

If that’s the sort of thing you like, then go for it. The bavât won’t have a clue but you might meet some friends. I remember how lonely it was at the start of mothering.
But if you prefer cuddling up on the sofa with a packet of hobnobs, believe me you are not doing your baby any disservice. I remember dragging a one year old and a three year old through the snow to go to a gymn class at 9 in the morning. Man the things you regret.

Poppins2016 · 19/06/2023 05:20

Do your friends have children?

Either

  1. they don't, so they have no idea what it's like
  2. they do, but have forgotten about what the baby days are like
  3. they do, but have forgotten that everyone's baby and parenting journey is different

I signed up for 'classes' with my first and second. Baby massage was a particular favourite. I also went to baby sensory (baby enjoyed it more than I did... 🤣) and "Mum and baby/toddler" groups (particularly good for socialising, tea and biscuits).

I think classes are particularly useful and important for Mum (nevermind the baby) to get out of the house. Maternity leave can sometimes be quite unstructured and lonely; it's really good to have opportunity to socialise with other mothers and get out of the house.

I'd book the classes. Worst that will happen is that you don't like them and don't rebook! Best thing would be a lovely class and potential new friends.

CurlewKate · 19/06/2023 05:23

All these classes are for the mother to get out and meet people-and maybe learn something and have a cup of tea made by someone else! The baby will be fine-she's with you. I did tons of these things because I'm very sociable and loved that side of it. If you think you might too, give it a go.

SittinOnTheDock · 19/06/2023 05:39

pinkhousesarebest · 19/06/2023 05:16

If that’s the sort of thing you like, then go for it. The bavât won’t have a clue but you might meet some friends. I remember how lonely it was at the start of mothering.
But if you prefer cuddling up on the sofa with a packet of hobnobs, believe me you are not doing your baby any disservice. I remember dragging a one year old and a three year old through the snow to go to a gymn class at 9 in the morning. Man the things you regret.

This!

Personally, at that age if you want to meet people I'd go for cheaper drop in classes. Committing to an expensive course could be pressure you don't need, and all baby classes will be happy for you to feed etc.

NCT often do walk and talk things or bumps and babies coffee stuff for free and you don't have to be a member.

HollyBerri · 19/06/2023 05:43

Definitely go - the class is for you not the baby. I did something very similar and loved it. You will learn skills you continue using and make new friends.

WandaWonder · 19/06/2023 05:52

I did something similar it helped me a lot, not just what we actually did but the routine of going out at set times and just being around other people, I do not get this bubble thing of staying home and never doing anything just because you have a baby

ironorchids · 19/06/2023 05:52

I think it's great!

Your baby will get new experiences. You'll get to meet people, share in the experience of being a new mother, just have a reason to get out of the house with the baby to go somewhere completely baby friendly.

Classes gave me so much joy and happiness and my baby seemed to be fine with being there, even if there were some classes slept through entirely. 4 weeks is only too young if you don't feel recovered enough or ready yet to go to them, or there is some kind of medical issue where you think your baby shouldn't go. Like a pp I went to baby sensory and there were plenty of one and two month old babies. It was a lovely experience as I'm sure baby massage will be too. Touch is so important for human communication and connection.

Who knows how much baby is taking in at this age? I think it all helps, the human brain is a remarkable and poorly understood organ capable of things we don't yet dream of. I think this kind of stimulation is likely very good for the baby. Enjoy!

autieawesome · 19/06/2023 05:53

Definitely go. I did baby massage, first aid and attended baby sensory. I made a lovely group of friends. Some of them are still good friends 7 years on.

sashh · 19/06/2023 06:34

It sounds lovely OP

You get to meet some other mums and learn a few things.

londonrach · 19/06/2023 06:37

I took DD to baby sensory at that age ..it wasn't for her, it was for me...it gave me something to do in the week and got me out. Best decision ever. Go for it op.

Iwanderedlonelyasagoat · 19/06/2023 06:56

I went to lots of baby classes. It got me out of the house and gave structure to my day. I really need this and would have struggled with maternity leave a lot otherwise - I needed at least one daily plan. Other people are different. Do what you like and will enjoy- your friends sound very judgemental.

Simianwalk · 19/06/2023 07:01

I loved baby classes. I was lucky that we had mainly free ones but I went to loads and loads.
I hate being in all day. I made some amazing new friends several of whom I am still good friends with 17 years on.
Going to several was good as at some there was no one I hit if off with and I would have been lonely without being to hang with.

NumberTheory · 19/06/2023 07:03

Agree with others, at that age the classes are for you. And you are definitely worth some expense. So go along and see if you like them. And if you don’t, find something else to do that you do like.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 19/06/2023 07:16

The classes are more for you than the baby. If the baby gets something out of it, great, but just look at the sessions as an opportunity to get out of the house and meet other mums.

It doesn't matter how old your baby is. I met mums with babies that were weeks old and months old at these sessions.

evuscha · 19/06/2023 07:23

Your baby might still be a little young, as in still spending a lot of time sleeping with short wake windows. But if the class is advertised for this age, go for it! It will be absolutely great for you, getting out of the house and meeting other mums.

MrsJBaptiste · 19/06/2023 07:23

I started classes with DS1 when he was 6 weeks old, they were great and I still see the other mums nearly 20 years later.

At this age, these classes were much better than the church hall sessions which were geared for older babies/toddlers rather than newborns.

shakeitoffsis · 19/06/2023 07:33

Defo go

Original poster
elm26 · 19/06/2023 09:51

Thank you everyone, you've made me feel so much better about it. It's true that it's probably more for me, I thought socialising with people in similar boat with babies and the learning baby massage and first aid in particular would be really useful and beneficial.

It is an expense but before baby was here I'd think nothing more of spending that amount of money in a bar with some friends or on a new outfit so I wanted to prioritise something for me and DD to do together.

You're all right about getting out of the house too, it's quite a lonely time when DH went back to work after paternity leave and most of my days seem a never ending circle of laundry, feeding, nappies, cuddles which of course I love and I love being a mum but would be nice to get out of my joggers and actually put a brush through my hair one day a week 😂

OP posts:
Purplemoon92 · 19/06/2023 09:55

Definitely go! It’ll be great for you to get out the house and meet other parents, even if your baby sleeps through the whole thing. First aid v useful too!

Kilorrery · 19/06/2023 10:00

elm26 · 19/06/2023 09:51

Thank you everyone, you've made me feel so much better about it. It's true that it's probably more for me, I thought socialising with people in similar boat with babies and the learning baby massage and first aid in particular would be really useful and beneficial.

It is an expense but before baby was here I'd think nothing more of spending that amount of money in a bar with some friends or on a new outfit so I wanted to prioritise something for me and DD to do together.

You're all right about getting out of the house too, it's quite a lonely time when DH went back to work after paternity leave and most of my days seem a never ending circle of laundry, feeding, nappies, cuddles which of course I love and I love being a mum but would be nice to get out of my joggers and actually put a brush through my hair one day a week 😂

I thought it was an utterly ghastly and lonely time (and I have no truck with the idea that it’s compulsory to ‘love being a mum’ to a newborn — I hated every second, and only found my parenting feet when I went back to work, early). If this turns out to feel helpful to you, absolutely go for it. If, on the other hand, your baby screams like a fire engine throughout and it’s stressful or not fun, don’t feel the slightest compunction about going back to nesting at home.

I personally panicked myself into going out far too much because I was so lonely (all family overseas, no local friends) and none of it was fun, and now I think I should have just calmed down a bit and fed and cuddled and watched old films.

But you do what works for you.

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