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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To plan a minibreak during DS school trip?

68 replies

MinibreakMum · 14/06/2023 18:08

NC as I’ve been talking about it at work and don’t want my usual posting name known.
In a nutshell, I’m a lone parent to 13DS, he has Sen but mostly functions well. Work full time and no family support, so everything usually falls on me.

Ds is due to take a 4 day school trip end of October this year to a European country, so I decided to use some annual leave to have a bit of time to myself. While browsing day trips and activities I came upon an offer for a minibreak in another country further from DS trip location than home, which I can just about afford with a bonus I recently got and saved. This is a dream destination for me, and as a solo traveller would be manageable to do the things I would like within 3 days. I would love to fit this trip in while DS is away (no problem travelling alone)

BUT when I think about booking it I feel anxious. Concerns are:

  • Being even further from DS than I would be at home if he had an issue on his trip and I wanted to get to him
  • the possibility of something going wrong with my travel, preventing me from making it home on time to meet him at school
  • MASSIVE amounts of guilt about spending this money on a solo trip when it could be used for a less interesting (ie UK) holiday for both of us, or even something he might need.

It was a split decision between my two co-workers whether they would do the same. Would you do this? Or am I mad and irresponsible to think of it?

opinions please!!

OP posts:
RhosynBach · 14/06/2023 20:53

Absolutely go for it and enjoy

Sewingdufus · 14/06/2023 21:03

My situation is similar to yours.

I wouldn’t feel guilty about spending the money but I would be concerned about being available if needed and the impact of delays in your travel plans.

Mexicocalling · 14/06/2023 21:19

I’m so glad you’ve booked it op!

All the people comparing this to UK outward bounds / scout camp situations are not being sensible. An ill child in the uk can be collected - it may involve a long car journey, but it’s perfectly possibly to phone and have mum or dad there if needed. This WILL NOT happen if your child is away in Europe!
I have taken school trips to Italy and Switzerland and had to accompany children to a&e. It’s horrible, it’s stressful, it’s an awful phone call to make… but on each occasion our school emergency plans swung into place, and parents were kept informed but did not need to travel out to us. It was managed by school staff and the pupil travelled back with the school. On one occasion the parent panicked and tried to travel out - it was a nightmare. No accommodation for them, no chance of getting them onto the same fully booked plane the school was using for the return.

waterrat · 14/06/2023 21:31

Hi Op. I have a child with SEN who recently went on a trip and I did not feel relaxed while they were away I have to be honest.

knottsberryfarm · 14/06/2023 21:32

I would do it provided there was a direct route from your destination to his. But I worry a lot…

ArgosKettle · 14/06/2023 21:39

I'd do it

Charliecatpaws · 14/06/2023 21:42

MinibreakMum · 14/06/2023 20:42

Thank you all for your opinions, on balance I have decided to go for it. I have booked the flights (yeep!!) and as an insurance measure, I bought a second, cheap, return seat on a later flight so I have a back up if my flight has issues or I don’t get to the airport on time.

My hotel can be cancelled up to the night before, and if I lose the cost of the flights should DS’s trip not go ahead, I am willing to take the hit for the chance I can go.

I will probably not get the opportunity to go anywhere for a few more years and it’s been a tough few years for me. I do have an emergency contact in case I don’t make it back, hopefully won’t need them though! And DS has been on a trip before (in the UK) which he thoroughly enjoyed, so it’s only likely I’ll get called for him if the entire school trip goes wrong.

In case anyone was wondering, I will be heading to see the beautiful Northern Lights! 😊

Good for you, enjoy your trip

greyhairnomore · 14/06/2023 21:44

I'd go.
Make sure you buy travel insurance before you book.
Eg an annual policy , some bank accounts have this as a paid benefit package.

YukoandHiro · 14/06/2023 21:45

I would if you had a very reliable local person as an emergency person - grandparent, sibling, very good friend (the type a child calls "auntie" or whatever). If you don't have that person I wouldn't tbh.

Original poster
MinibreakMum · 14/06/2023 21:51

Mexicocalling · 14/06/2023 21:19

I’m so glad you’ve booked it op!

All the people comparing this to UK outward bounds / scout camp situations are not being sensible. An ill child in the uk can be collected - it may involve a long car journey, but it’s perfectly possibly to phone and have mum or dad there if needed. This WILL NOT happen if your child is away in Europe!
I have taken school trips to Italy and Switzerland and had to accompany children to a&e. It’s horrible, it’s stressful, it’s an awful phone call to make… but on each occasion our school emergency plans swung into place, and parents were kept informed but did not need to travel out to us. It was managed by school staff and the pupil travelled back with the school. On one occasion the parent panicked and tried to travel out - it was a nightmare. No accommodation for them, no chance of getting them onto the same fully booked plane the school was using for the return.

Thank you for this it’s very reassuring, I suspected as much would be the case for his trip. If he were staying in the UK I would 100% not have booked a trip away!

OP posts:
ChateauMargaux · 14/06/2023 21:53

Go for it and have an amazing time!!

Not the same.. but I took off into the wilds when my kids were away with school.. I faffed for the entire morning... left later than I should have done.. drove then hiked to my destination.. singing 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, doesn't mean I'm lonely cause I'm alone '- alternating between loving being out in the hills.. totally alone... when all the other hikers had gone home.. to wondering what might happen if that cloud burst before I reached the hut and if I had enough with me to hunker under a rock for the night.

The Northern Lights sounds TOTALLY AMAZING!!! Savour every minute!!

Fluffypuppy1 · 14/06/2023 21:53

EVHead · 14/06/2023 18:11

I wouldn’t - what if his trip is cancelled? What if he’s ill and can’t go? What if he needs to come home early?

Is there anyone else who could deal with the above, if you’re away?

This.

DH and I booked a couple of nights in London for when DS was supposed to be away with his school last year. DS’s trip got cancelled 4 days before due to a shortage of staff at the resort.

RunAwayTurnAwayRunAwayTurnAway · 14/06/2023 21:55

I hope you have a wonderful time OP! X

ADX · 14/06/2023 22:10

MinibreakMum

i have been the parent with an injured child on a school ski trip
as pp said stressful especially receiving that call, he had had treatment at hospital by the point if the call, school handled it brilliantly , I was able to speak to him mobile phone, but after first panicking and getting ready to fly out to Italy I was reassured and he travelled back with his group . Though I did then shell out for about her trip a year later to make up for it as he kissed most of the skiing

hope you have a great time

Cakeorchocolate · 14/06/2023 22:15

I'm pleased for you that you've done it OP. It sounds like a good opportunity to enjoy some responsibility free time.

I'd absolutely love a trip to see the northern lights - hope you're lucky!

TheYearOfSmallThings · 14/06/2023 23:02

Have a wonderful time OP - I'm glad you booked it. Come back and tell us whether you saw any lights!

dearJayne · 14/06/2023 23:23

Schools tell you not to book time away when kids are on residential trips.

GoodChat · 15/06/2023 06:21

The Northern Lights! Amazing!!!

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