Uninvited holiday guests

[Whenwilliberich]

Going on a holiday with BIL and their family and PIL for two weeks in Spain this summer holidays.

getting the ferry down over a couple of days so it’ll be a fairly straightforward journey.

have just been told that two of BILs girlfriends friends are going to be joining us on the first night there in a camper van over night. However I’ve booked the Airbnb and it doesn’t say anything about this being allowed. Apparently they are very nice. They will apparently do us a bbq.

AIBU to not want to spend the first night of my holiday with two strangers all the while, only getting in at 6:00 and having to feed kids and put them to bed pretty much within the hour as they are grumpy kids without bed.

i don’t know how to say that won’t work for us without being rude or pissing people off even before we’ve started a two week holiday!

it’s also going to be out only holiday for about 4 years. We have two small kids.

Your BIL clearly isn't bothered about pissing you off. Why on earth wouldn't you say something? 🙄

Are they parking up for 1 night, or the whole break?

Honestly, it's one night and they're going to cook for you. I don't think it's a massive issue

For one night, I'd just suck it up. Not worth falling out with family over.

One night only? And they won't be in your accommodation?
Surely you just do your own thing and get the dc fed and into bed. Of all the nights it's probably the easiest as you will be busy. Politely decline bbq and socialising as uou are tired snd need to get kids settled and an early night.

I get it. I hate my plans being hijacked. I'd ask for more details.

I wouldn’t really like this either. Just say it’s not what you fancy doing on your first night of holiday. Suggest they all go out for a meal with their friends and you chill with family at the house.

Or suggest if they are desperate to meet up the girls can camp close by - they go and meet them and you don’t have to bother.

I wouldn't love this but if it's just one night and they're in their own van it will probably be okay and not worth making a thing over.

For the sake of one night and they’re not even staying in your accommodation, I think you have to suck it up. Doesn’t mean that you have to join in with their plans though.

I couldn't get worked up about this. It's 1 night and I really don't think it's going to have much impact on your holiday.

Can’t see the issue . It is one night on the property offering to cook .

you never know you might have a nice time ?

I hope whoever has booked the accommodation has checked that it’s ok to park a camper van on the property, as I doubt they will agree to it. Where we’ve stayed, it has been made clear how many people are allowed.

I hope whoever has booked the accommodation has checked that it’s ok to park a camper van on the property, as I doubt they will agree to it. Where we’ve stayed, it has been made clear how many people are allowed

They can park somewhere else if it's a problem. Honestly it's literally just an evening and the reason why you can't articulate why it won't work is because there isn't a legitimate reason apart from you not liking the sound of it.

Get in, feed kids, put them to bed, eat food that someone else has made, either have a nice time or eat and go to bed.

This is what you say to your bil. He needs to check with the property host regarding parking the camper van overnight. If it is not allowed, then he is responsible for finding a campsite to park in overnight.

They're not staying in your property so there won't be any inconvenience to you.

That's the trouble with holidaying with other people- you're not in complete control of plans.
There are inevitably going to be compromises and differences in expectations.

YANBU if it was more than one night. But I think, on balance I'd try to just make the most of it. You may really like their company. Or you may want to concentrate on settling the kids the first night anyway.

I don't think one night takes the piss. If it was multiple nights, then I think it deserves a conversation and agreement.

I would be annoyed and I'd speak to your BIL/'SIL' about this (assuming his GF is coming) and let them know you're not happy. Are these friends already there? You might find you're all travelling on the same ferry!
But let's assume it's your SIL who's told them she'll be on holiday and they've arranged to meet up for one night as its close by....I wouldn't like it but it might cause more problems to say no...unless of course the BBQ and the campervan will cause an issue. If the booking is in your name I'd be checking the T&Cs very carefully. Maybe there's a charge for pitching in which case I'd forward it....or I'd look for somewhere local and say if BIL and SIL want to meet up they can go to XYZ campsite.
Don't blame the friends. Chances are they know your PIL too.

They're not 'uninvited' if the BIL's girlfriend has invited them.

Suck it up, buttercup.

They aren't uninvited though- someone has invited them

You have reminded me why I never go on this type of holiday set up!

Who booked the Airbnb? If you have access to the booking just message and ask if it’s ok.

A bit precious tbh. Anyway, you don't have to socialise with them, you can sit inside and cook for yourselves if you prefer.

Your not the only one going on holiday, moaning for moaning sake really.

This is why I don’t do this type of holiday.
I’m also always very vague about where I’m going on holiday. I’ve got 2 holidays booked and when people have asked I am not disclosing the names of the villas etc. Neither do I disclose which travel company I have booked with.

For one night, I would just put up with it. I also hate it when people invite themselves to things.

Just ask them to be quiet so that you can get the kids to bed. They might be nice people to have a chat with in the evening- how nice for the girlfriend that her friends will be in the same place, of course she wants to see them it's her holiday too. Are you jealous of single women being around your husband or something?