49 and looking haggard. Is this just inevitable now?

[sharktractorbingo]

time I catch a glimpse of myself recently I just think how aged I’m looking. I don’t know if that just it now, I’m getting old and need to accept that my looks are fading. I really try to look after myself - these are the things I do: I rarely drink alcohol, I eat a healthy diet, I drink at least 2 litres of water every day, I run 5 miles 4 times a week, I always cleanse and moisturise my face twice a day, I take a multivitamin daily. My BMI is 20.6.
I have been more stressed than normal as I have teens doing exams at the moment.
Is there anything else I should be doing?

I’m also on HRT.

Following, I'm 45 and want to stop my face dropping any more!

Runners face?

We went to a concert on Wednesday and DD took a photo of me - and I nearly cried. I look just like my Nan used to.... and she always looked old even when she wasn't.

I'm 52. FFS.

Don't worry, I think we go through phases, in my 40s I looked quite young, in my 50s not so much, but then I didn't change so looked OK for a 60 something, now in my 70s and look bloody awful, but optimistic for my 80s, or perhaps I will care even less than I do now and it won't matter!

I've always looked young for my age, until recently! I think it's worse having been always told I look young as I feel the pressure to not look 45 😂 I look in the mirror and I see a 45 year old which should be fine but I want to see a 25 year old 😂
My wrinkly neck is the thing I hate most. I slather firming product on my face and neck before bed and DH always moans about my slippery face when he kisses me goodnight haha

Sorry, no helpful suggestions, I'm trying to learn to roll with it and embrace being older...!

@FatLarrysBanned Runners face?
This has crossed my mind! It keeps me sane though so really don’t want to stop.

Your BMI is low and you run four times a week. And you are stressed. You will look haggard. It is not at all downhill from here necessarily, but you would have to make some changes to your lifestyle. If you don't, you will probably continue to look haggard.

It's the arse or face choice after a certain point, sadly.

I looked pretty ok for years, then in the span of a few months I seemed to age 10 years! It did coincide with the start of the menopause for me.

I did then put on some weight and my rounder face looked less haggard than my thinner one! But now I'm stuck with the face vs body dilemma. It may not happen to everyone but definitely did in my case.

I am practicing a level of acceptance. It's a cliche but it is a privilege to get older. And the truth is I'd rather spend my time and money on things I consider more fun than beauty routines/treatments etc.

The way I look at it is, when we are children we aren't thinking about our looks. We just think about having fun and living life. Then we have decades where we do care about how we look. For some that can be really difficult. I definitely had my own issues. So now I want to enjoy the rest of my life with that not caring mentality again.

I wouldn’t stop running if you enjoy it and keeps you mentally sound (totally understandable) but perhaps you could swap out the occasional run for a lower impact exercise session? Runners do tend to have less muscle and body fat and your BMI is on the lower side. All of that will equal a bit more saggy / haggardy face sorry.

Most of it is genetic so I wouldn’t give up anything you love for the sake of a tiny improvement.

i think countering the physical signs of aging comes down to a mix of Collagen, retinol, weightlifting and maintaining a tiny bit more body fat - plus Botox and filler if you’re willing to.

I chose the face, the body's nothing to write home about though😀

I am chubby and on HRT, I do not smoke but I am 52 and have a smooth unlined face

I am 48 and got told the other day by a whole team of people they thought I was about 27.

My BMI is also around 21 and I do drink some alcohol, but honestly the game changer for me has been diet and sleep and the great outdoors.

I know saturated fat has been vilified in recent decades but the moment I switched my diet away from 'healthy' seed oils (veg, sunflower, rapeseed etc) and ate beef dripping, butter and occasionally olive oil, cut out all processed food, upped my protein intake (especially red meat), then my skin transformed. I think we need good fat as women - as that is NOT that bullshit processed fat. At 40 I looked quite tired, now I have bright eyes and clear plump skin. I also tan (Nordic skin tones) and never wear sun lotion (toxic bullshit).

I also make sure I sleep properly - I actually only need 6.5 to 7 hours a night, but I go to bed at a similar time and wake up naturally (around 6-7) and take magnesium before bed.

Sleep and food - and doing lots of exercise! My Apple Health app tells me I have averaged 98 mins of exercise a day for the past year.

Your looks aren't fading, they are changing.
Why use the word haggard about yourself? Would you describe any of your friends in that way?
A relaxed and confident and happy face could never be haggard.

J Lo said it
at a certain age you have to choose between your ass or you face

I would advise building some weights/cross training into your exercise routine and don't hold back on avocados, nuts, seeds and oily fish in your diet.

Also consider taking oestrogen HRT.

Women are so fucked up with all this beauty stuff. It is surprising to see ourselves age but why do people think something the do ‘right’ will stop it. Just accept it and be grateful if it’s just your appearance deteriorating. If your body still works and runs and your mind thinks fast, that’s a huge gift.

I’ve got the same issue. I haven’t really got any wrinkles which is great but my face is definitely sagging and I hate it.

I am 45 and look in the mirror and wonder what the hell happened. I feel out of place at work. All men aside from a sprinkling of younger women. I am the only middle aged women.

But I am trying to stop the negative narrative that consumes my mind. Why does it matter if I have a wrinkly neck and dropy eyelids? If I look my age, so what? My cousin died at my age 18 months ago. Makes me want to do shit and ignore societies views on aging women.

I focus on fitness now.

Eat more and put on some weight. Honestly, it’s the only way after 50.
Add some Pilates/Yoga/HiTT or anything else that builds muscle rather than burns fat so that the additional weight looks ‘toned’

My mum never drinks and is a size 8/10 and is really strict with herself, and she looks very old. My stepmom is a size 12/14 and drinks and eats what she likes (within reason - healthy but doesn’t deprive herself) and looks far younger and more healthy! I genuinely believe thinner people age more badly. Their skin gets… droopy?

It’s hard to know if it’s the running / lower weight or you may just be being harsh on yourself?

I am 48 and got told the other day by a whole team of people they thought I was about 27.

That is a decent chunk of years there

I am sure they were exaggerating

I think I look my age but just healthy. Bright eyes and rosy skin do it really - that is what I think of when I think 'haggard' - tired.