To change friends Birthday plans

[SweetStrawberrie]

Hello,

I have messed up and double booked myself!

Agreed to go for lunch with a friend next Sunday as their birthday is mid week but I totally forgot that I am meant to be at a music festival and food tasting event the same day! Already paid for months ago! Not sure how I got the dates so messed up, for some reason I thought the festival was next month!

Not sure what to do - me and birthday friend haven't booked anywhere yet or spoken about it for a little while but I still feel guilty!

However, I can't really afford to loose the money I paid for this festival either! (60 quid)

What would you do? Feeling like a shitty friend.

I think birthday friend is going to be super pissed off, even if I ask if we can move it to another day.

Like fuck would I drop a 60 pound festival ticket to avoid telling someone I made a mistake with dates and double-booked myself when I invited her to lunch. Honestly, the way some people on here will twist things to avoid actually saying no to someone... She is an adult and as such, should be able to cope with celebrating her birthday on a different date. I would write and apologize for the mix up and suggest a couple of dates close to her birthday. If she can't deal with that, then I think the problem lies with her expectations of friends, not with the OP.

@sonjadog i think there are real differences in how people manage their diaries. This may be a genuine one off but I definitely feel like I know two kinds of people when it comes to plans - those who put things in the diary and stick to it and those who change plans when something better comes along or forgets plans easily. I don't know which OP is obviously but this accounts for the difference responses IMO.

I have already said what happened - I have not waited for something better to come along nor do I usually forget things, again have already said this is the first time with this friend that I have to rearrange something.

She has ignored me which I am okay about tbh - makes my life easier if I don't have to take a barrage of abuse for an honest mistake

And truly, i get the disappointment but I also have young children 3 and under, a full time job and run a household. She lives at home, is child free and works part time.

No judgement here but I can understand from her perspective it probably looks very thoughtless but honestly I am knackered nearly 100 percent of the time, have never cancelled on her before and make an effort to check in with her regularly and just think that okay yes, I've messed up my dates but it wasn't done maliciously or intentionally. If she doesn't want to talk to me over it then I'm okay with that.

Brace yourself for the tantrums and sulks when you ring her with the change of plan and just plow through it. Don't let the fall out bother you, get on with your own plans and let her deal with it however she wants.

I'd be backing away from this shite.

I think you are completely misreading my posts and I'm not sure whther it's deliberate. I didn't say you were one of these people. I was responding to what PP had said about other people's posts. You are hard word.

@FerretFarm you said you didn't know which OP was..

But you're totally right to let the friendship go if she gives you a hard time over a one off.