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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she was being a bit ridiculous?

91 replies

Diagonalley96 · 01/06/2023 14:59

I have two sisters who both live at home with my parents. Both are in their 20’s and saving up to buy their own homes.
sister 1- low income job, partner lives with her at my mums.
sister 2- secondary school teacher. Partner works/lives away but is off for the next 3 weeks and staying back here with my sister at my mums.

today Sister 2’s partner had a day out planned with his friends. Hasn’t seen them since before Christmas. They planned to meet in the city centre at 12.

We have a family group chat on messenger. Sister messages this at about ten to 9 this morning, panicking as she has locked her partner in the house. She starts asks sister 1 if she or her partner can come home and let him out the house. Sister 1 says she can’t leave work (care home). She says her partner can’t leave work either (supermarket) but that he will be home by 2pm.

it’s worth noting that this was planned as a whole day piss up and that the train to the city centre is very regular and takes 15/20 mins.

Sister 2 then asks my parents to come home but they can’t manage this either (nurse and bus driver). Sister then goes off in a rant, essentially stating that her job is more “important” and that someone else should be making an effort to come home and sort this out.

she then asks me to get a bus (with 2 kids under 2) to my mums workplace and get her key. Then take it back to her partner. I said no as I’m not spending an hour on my day on busses just to avoid her partner being a bit late to a day in the pub. She told me that I was being incredibly selfish.

sister 1 is now not talking to any of us. I feel like she was asking a lot of everyone though. Yes he works away and I imagine this day out meant a lot to him but surely missing a few hours wouldn’t be the end of the world?

OP posts:
Original poster
Diagonalley96 · 01/06/2023 16:10

Lochjeda · 01/06/2023 15:33

Is she too far to of shot back at break or lunchtime? She's clearly not got a job that's more important than a bloody nurse or someone in a care home for a start and bus drivers can't just reroute the bus.

She works about 40 mins from home so it’s too far a drive.

OP posts:
KrisAkabusi · 01/06/2023 16:11

Out the window and then push it closed again. None would be able to tell it wasn't closed properly.

Also this is a massive fire risk and needs sorting.

Aaron95 · 01/06/2023 16:11

Climb out a window, pull it closed. Yes it may be unlocked but the chances of someone trying to break in on the exact same day/time must be miniscule.

Moveoverdarlin · 01/06/2023 16:12

He climbs out a downstairs window and shuts it behind him. Person home at two can lock it. What are the chances of getting burgled in that time? Very small. If I was him, I’d go out the window and never mention it. It would have been fine!

Original poster
Diagonalley96 · 01/06/2023 16:12

Successstory82 · 01/06/2023 16:09

why relevant to know she’s on a low income?

Purely because the sister who was causing chaos felt that this was reaso enough to have the other sister leave work. That her job isn’t “important”. Utter nonsense m.

OP posts:
Successstory82 · 01/06/2023 16:13

Your poor poor parents

RosettaTheGardenFairy · 01/06/2023 16:13

Up to who ever locked him in to go back and unlock the door.

Worrisome that that many people can live in a property with only one fire escape.

If DH had a drinking session planned with his mates and got locked in, he would shimmy his arse up the chimney before being even a minute late!

Successstory82 · 01/06/2023 16:15

Am I correct in thinking you don’t generally get on with sister 2

and presumably if a nurse and bus driver parents… they don’t live in a mansion.

and yet they have their two adult daughters and their partners living (and squabbling) with them.

my heart goes out to them!!

Successstory82 · 01/06/2023 16:16

RosettaTheGardenFairy · 01/06/2023 16:13

Up to who ever locked him in to go back and unlock the door.

Worrisome that that many people can live in a property with only one fire escape.

If DH had a drinking session planned with his mates and got locked in, he would shimmy his arse up the chimney before being even a minute late!

Flats?

and if a property - whilst you only have one door to escape, you presumably have ground floor windows

Ijustdontcare · 01/06/2023 16:23

Some of the comments on here genuinely shock me. If this was a Woman posting saying her DP had accidentally locked her in and wouldn't be back in time, and she was meeting friends for drinks, the thread would be full of "Red FLAGS", "LTB" "he's being a controlling wanker" etc. Instead its just , it's only the pub etc what's his problem.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/06/2023 16:24

RosettaTheGardenFairy · 01/06/2023 16:13

Up to who ever locked him in to go back and unlock the door.

Worrisome that that many people can live in a property with only one fire escape.

If DH had a drinking session planned with his mates and got locked in, he would shimmy his arse up the chimney before being even a minute late!

Too right… mine would put on the mission impossible theme and Houdini his way out.

Tessasanderson · 01/06/2023 16:29

Easy solution to your high maintenance sister. She pays for a taxi to go to her mums work and pick up key, drive to the house and open the door. No inconvenience and only your sister is out of pocket

PinkStarAtNight · 01/06/2023 16:32

ShirleyPhallus · 01/06/2023 15:12

The whole thing is ridiculous but this should honestly be a wake up call that you need to have some way of getting out of the house. Imagine there was a fire!

I assumed that the issue was that he didn't have a key, so would be able to physically leave the house (e.g in an emergency) but as sister didn't leave key he wouldn't be able to lock up behind him, which really means that he can't go out can he? Unless I've misunderstood. If he literally can't get out the house without a key then that's a major health and safety issue, but obviously not the point of the thread!

OP YANBU. Bizarre that your sister expected all of you to leave work/ drop other commitments/sacrifice your day to go let him out when it wasn't your problem. It was her mistake and her partner's issue. I agree if he had something like a court appearance it would have been nice of someone to make more of an effort to help, but even then it wouldn't be their responsibility and she must understand that people can't just leave work. Does she think teaching is the only job that prohibits employees from leaving during a shift?

She sounds disrespectful tbh and if I were your parents I'd be having firm words. I wonder whether it was her partner who was on the other end of her phone pressurising her to force someone in the family to help? Is sister usually like this in terms of being entitled/disrespectful/demanding etc or could this be the partner's influence?

Velvian · 01/06/2023 16:34

Climb out of the window, push the window shut. It would be really unlucky for someone to try the window during the time before someone got home.

Feraldogmum · 01/06/2023 16:36

Sounds a bit of a spoilt and arrogant madam, quite unpleasant to treat others as if they don’t count and that she’s some superior being.
Hope she doesn’t treat the pupils like that.Sounds like she needs to do a bit of growing up and maybe she should be moving out sooner rather than later. Pity the parents.

AngryGreasedSantaCatcus · 01/06/2023 16:38

Ijustdontcare · 01/06/2023 16:23

Some of the comments on here genuinely shock me. If this was a Woman posting saying her DP had accidentally locked her in and wouldn't be back in time, and she was meeting friends for drinks, the thread would be full of "Red FLAGS", "LTB" "he's being a controlling wanker" etc. Instead its just , it's only the pub etc what's his problem.

Actually it's mostly "what's her problem" , as it's the sister kicking off and being a dick.

burnoutbabe · 01/06/2023 16:40

it doesn't sound like a fire risk as he can get out - via a window - easily.

just then the house would not be secure.

lunchNstuff · 01/06/2023 16:43

Immediately all of you club in to get a thumbnail lock system. Today.

Just curious, is it a house or a flat/maisonette. Is there a back garden? I'm curious as to the layout. Never heard of a house without a back door/patio door before now, but I've led a sheltered life 😂

Your parents are saints. Bless them.

SallyWD · 01/06/2023 16:43

I feel sorry for your parents having 4 other adults in the house! I assume they don't mind...

Frogmila · 01/06/2023 16:44

She could have easily solved this with a courier or taxi to the nearest workplace but her first thought was to get other people to put in the leg work for her. Needs to grow up.

Punkkitty · 01/06/2023 16:46

How was he gonna lock the door behind him when he left if he had no key to open it from the inside…?
I assume then he was going to just saunter off and leave it unlocked until the returner came home at 2.
So essentially the same as if he had gotten out the window.

I think we all now know sis locked boyfy in and then rapidly regretted and tried to get everyone to sort it. The fact he was asleep and oblivious to it all might support this theory also…

givemushypeasachance · 01/06/2023 16:49

I got locked in a house like this once - when me and my sister were students and I was visiting her at her shared house in Plymouth. She left for a class or whatever, my train wasn't for another hour. Then the remaining housemate who'd been home also left without me realising - I couldn't unlock the front door to get out. Had to climb out of a window and hope I wasn't mistaken for a burglar! It was a funny story to tell, I didn't blame anyone else.

NotAnotherUserNumber · 01/06/2023 16:57

lunchNstuff · 01/06/2023 16:43

Immediately all of you club in to get a thumbnail lock system. Today.

Just curious, is it a house or a flat/maisonette. Is there a back garden? I'm curious as to the layout. Never heard of a house without a back door/patio door before now, but I've led a sheltered life 😂

Your parents are saints. Bless them.

If it is a house rather than a flat then it could be one built back to back style or built against some other structure like a retaining wall or railway line.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Back-to-back_house

Arewehumanorarewecupboards · 01/06/2023 17:02

Maybe she looked him in on purpose so he couldn’t go out with his mates and now she’s yelling at everyone else so that she doesn’t look like the baddie.

If she’s that important and perfect why is she still living with her parents?

ejbaxa · 01/06/2023 17:06

He could have climbed out of a window, fetched a key off the nearest key holder and gone back, opened the front door and then shut the window he got out of.

the sister stamping her feet sounds pathetic and helpless - as does her bloke