AIBU for getting upset husband selling family car for his motorbike?

[Carlou]

we do have two cars. I work shiftwork so not in the same hours as everyone else including husband. We 9 years off retiring and kids have grown. Have only just paid off mortgage after a long slog mainly by me whilst he used our money (and my inheritance money) to buy a company of his own (that we sold at considerable loss 3 yrs ago). Now husband insisting he sells HIS car (which has tow bar and we and other family members use regularly as a work horse) so that he can buy his dream motorcycle. He listed the vehicle without even consulting me and wouldn't listen when I tried to talk to him about it. He has a motorcycle in shed he stripped down years ago but never got fixed mainly due to money issues when he wasn't bringing in a wage and I was keeping the household afloat. This one he was going to sell to help finance his dream machine but now he insists he is going to have both! My vehicle is small, and couldn't tow even if it did have a tow bar. Am I wrong to be upset?

Your family members can buy the car off him if they want.

OP, why are you with him? Because everyone is throwing a lot of insult's around here but you chose to stay. Why?

I can’t work out if this is a joke.

So if your DH came home with a tattoo you’d throw him out? Seems reasonable 😂

I used to work in a hospital - the surgeon called motorcyclists organ-donors.

Make sure you have some money tucked away - look into increasing your pensions.

Put a tow bar on the motorbike

I rode a bike (more moped!) many years ago and I am sure it was mentioned then. if I remember rightly it was because they would tend to buy very expensive powerful bikes but that they were out of practice of handling them.

What a selfish man.
Ridiculous behaviour.

agree you should Double down on life insurance.

Make sure he takes out great life insurance and let him crack on! Your problem will solve itself!

Lol 😆. I’d worked out the first four letters of the acronym but the rest of it I would never have deciphered on my own.

What did the surgeon call suicide victims?

Or people who needed surgery due to obesity causing diabetes?

Or anyone else who had the misfortune to die in an accident not of their own making?

Or are you in fact making it up?

I'm a female biker. Love bikes for years they were my life. I'd never have pulled a stunt like this without discussing it with the whole family first. That's an incredibly selfish thing to do.

I've heard loads of medics call them that ... including those who have bikes. It's just a common expression. They see the results.

You probably don't want to know what they say about your other examples. Medics have a black sense of humour.

@ProfessorXtra

I know a lot of people with motorbikes and they all have a car as well. What bike is his dream bike?

Bloke in his mid/late fifties?
Odds are a Ducati, BMW GS, or Harley.

OP, it’s safe to assume ( from the unfinished bike in the garage ) that he won’t be riding this dream bike every day, just when the sun is shining , birds are singing, no sign of rain for 24 hours.

Please have the conversation about how he thinks he’s getting about when those conditions are different.

Was it Covid that wrecked the business?
Was it profitable before or was he not arsed , just like the status of being a business owner/boss man?

Buying a dream motorbike scream of status to me.

Fewer cars per household is a good thing, why do you need to tow things? If you do, could you sell your car and keep his?

I have friend who is a policeman, he says more motor bike accidents happen to older men who passed their bike tests years ago, when they probably learned to ride on a Honda 125 or whatever, maybe then bought a 250cc but stopped riding due to family coming along and haven’t ridden one since. Family grow up , dad has more disposable income (or sells family car, twat) thinks he’s Barry Sheen re-incarnated and goes out and buys a 1000cc and ends up wrapped round a tree because he’s totally unprepared for the power of the beast.

So will he use the bike for commuting to work? That'll be fun during the winter and absolutely trash his new bike.

What do you tow? Is 'his' car the more expensive one? Can he sell the cheaper one?

Ultimately he's being v selfish to sell something that's a family 'tool' for something that only he can use.

HIS car or the car purchased with your hard earned cash that he claimed because it was the better car? If you need the bigger car keep the bigger car

Motorcyclists have long been known as "organ donors" - a relatively large pool of healthy people dying suddenly. A side effect of the first lockdown was a reduction in motorbike crashes (as bikers stayed home) and subsequent organ donations.

some interesting responses here. Thanks to all who wrote. I was originally wondering if what I was feeling was over the top. Now I see that my thinking was in line with what a lot of you have expressed. (I'm not going mad afterall!) Thanks

I think the term organ donors, or mobile organ donors, is commonplce in the medical profession. Daughter's FIL, a now retired GP, introduced us to the term.

He sounds very self indulgent. Is there any 'expensive but essential' gaming equipment, for example, lying around that you can sell and bank the proceeds? Just reminded me, a friend bought a house from a divorcing couple and got some local builders in to do a few things. "Morning Mrs X, we ere taking bets on how long previous owners marriage would last. We call him Midlife Crisis Man" he then enumerated the assorted Motorbikes, Jet Skis, Boats and Cars he'd got through in the past 10 years. A local legend, apparently. I believe he had no idea.

We have two cars, mine and hers, with each of us being the Keeper and insurer of 'ours'. Insurance policies are mirrored so that each is covered on the other including business.

On an ordinary working day I'll use mine and she'll use 'hers'. However if it's a holiday in our caravan we'll take hers as it's got the power, towbar (and kerbweight) to be the towcar; for the most part I'll drive it.

If she sold 'hers' without consultation I'd have her guts for garters!!

Reading the OP I wondered if she was my neighbour but in that case a car that fitted her description was traded for an older 2 seat sports coupe of the same German make. Kids are pretty much grown up but live at home. Maybe family hols are no longer a thing..

Well I wouldn’t have married anyone that is interested in tattoos/piercings/smoking etc in the first place so it wouldn’t happen.

But yes. Knowing my views on tattoos, if he were to get one without speaking to me about it then he would be showing he didn’t respect me or care for me, and I don’t want to be with someone like that.

Bloody hell! You’re not joking.

No We all have our own things that are dealbreakers in relationships.