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Original poster

To want to celebrate paying off the mortgage

119 replies

BodgerLovesMashedPotato · 28/05/2023 23:19

Not something I can say out loud in RL, as know how insane prices are nowadays and it's hard for people to buy a house, or even pay monthly mortgage payments, but ours has just finished.
Just it's a part of life I feel I need to keep quiet, not sure what to say when talking to others when they're mentioning rent or mortgage payment troubles keeping up etc, and how do I manage it
Just nod and agree it's difficult (as I know how that feels and how shit it feels to scrape by all too well) is what I usually do but it doesn't seem right as by doing this it sounds like I'm paying rent or mortgage payments?
Anyone else rent or mortgage free, as I say can't say in RL and hard to find anyone online who is

OP posts:
TiredOfCleaning · 29/05/2023 07:30

I never tell anyone we are mortgage free (and I thank my lucky stars every pay day that we are).

We did not do anything when we became mortgage free. But I remember when my parents did. We went away to a 5 star hotel and had a special dinner and went to the opera. It was wonderful. Then they saved the mortgage payment equivalent and a few years later bought a teeny holiday house which they then retired to.

NeedToChangeName · 29/05/2023 07:34

It's great to pay off the mortgage and cause for celebration, but I don't understand why you would want to discuss finances with friends

I have no idea of my friends' savings, pensions or mortgage situations

Summerishereagain · 29/05/2023 07:35

Definitely celebrate with the money you’re saving just don’t tell anybody. We have just inherited some money and will pay off 25% off our mortgage over the next few years. In terms of monthly payments it will mean when we come out of our fixed terms we will be paying the same as now which seems crazy but it means we will escape paging more.

I know if a couple of year BIL and SIL who have been given the same amount of money will have spent in all on stuff and have nothing to show for it and will be complain about the mortgage rate then.

orangegato · 29/05/2023 07:36

Damn right celebrate your hard work.

FrownedUpon · 29/05/2023 07:38

You can celebrate privately, but you don’t need to tell other people. I don’t get why it’s an issue.

WalterWitty · 29/05/2023 07:40

I really love reading all the posts from those who’ve paid off their mortgages!! Gives me such hope for the future - congrats to you all!

soupmaker · 29/05/2023 07:42

We're early 50s and bought just before the financial crash in 2008. We will be done in 2 years or so. A combination of monthly overpayments for the years I earned well and a small inheritance reduced ours. I will be celebrating wildly but just between us.

A pal recently asked if we'd paid ours off as their monthly payments had jumped by over £100. I've never felt so relieved that we fixed and owe less than £20k.

GnomeDePlume · 29/05/2023 07:44

thatsn0tmyname · 29/05/2023 07:05

I remember as a child my parents paying off their mortgage. They galloped up and down the hallway saying " we're free, we're free ".

I love that!

I can imagine DH and I will feel like that.

If things go to plan we will finish paying off our mortgage in about four years. By that time we will have been paying a mortgage for 35 years!

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 29/05/2023 07:45

We paid ours off in January and I've only told my brother.

I was recently with a group of people and one was saying how she's almost paid hers off (only ten years to go...) and I just stayed quiet.

Honestly though, I'm hardly noticing the difference as things are so expensive now.

loislovesstewie · 29/05/2023 07:46

We opened a bottle of champagne when we paid ours off! When I confessed to others it seemed they had all done similar but hadn't said so in order to avoid upsetting those still stuck.
Raise a glass of your favourite tipple, OP! You deserve it.

ReviewingTheSituation · 29/05/2023 07:47

Congratulations! I can totally get how you feel. It's so odd not feeling like you can share what is a pretty momentous thing for most people. I get the kind of guilt that comes with it - especially when friends are struggling. We have friends the same age as us who have mortgages until they're 70, and no obvious means to pay back any sooner (unlikely to have a big career change, no chance of interitance).
We didn't tell anyone, but we bought our first house in 1997, so if people did the maths, they'd know 25 years was up (obvs we could have remortgaged for a longer term in the intervening years, but it was uncommon in the 2000s, rates were low in the 2010s, and we've only moved (modestly) twice in that time).

We didn't do anything specific to celebrate, but we did holiday in a more extravagant fashion than normal - we didn't take the cheapest flights, we stayed in slightly nicer hotels, ate where we wanted to, and that was a nice feeling. We have put the mortgage payments into ISAs, but need to work out what to do ongoing. Maybe move house and get a mortgage!!

Aprilx · 29/05/2023 07:50

We paid ours off ten years ago. I think we might have celebrated with a bottle of champagne and a nice dinner, but we didn’t announce it to anybody else. It has never really come up in conversation since then, I certainly would not reply that I am mortgage free if somebody commented on mortgage rates.

SchoolShenanigans · 29/05/2023 07:50

BodgerLovesMashedPotato · 28/05/2023 23:25

You've literally just paid it off so surely you can suitably empathise, nod your head and say something like "I know, mortgage rates are crazy, aren't they" and leave it there
That's literally what I said I do do though, to my friends both with mortgages and renting?
Saying "oh it's so good to have paid it all off" is something you feel you can't share with anyone.

Show quote history

Don't say it then? You can be happy about something without talking about it.

olympicsrock · 29/05/2023 07:53

Congratulations! I remember that feeling too . It was lovely to own our own house. Then 6 months later we remortgaged to buy a holiday home. Back to little disposable income - but lovely sunny holidays.

SedentaryCat · 29/05/2023 07:54

We had a bottle of champagne when we paid ours off - we were left some money by MIL. Close family know we don't have a mortgage but few other people.

Like everyone else we've either paid a mortgage or paid the rent so it felt odd not to have to worry about it.

mrsbyers · 29/05/2023 07:54

38 payments for me , 20’years of it paid while battling two chronic illlnesses , double figure surgeries and being told twice I needed to give up work and medically retire. Owning my home , in my name has always kept me going - I will celebrate and partially retire (55) and not remotely arsed who it bothers

LighthouseCat · 29/05/2023 07:58

Congratulations! I hadn't really been engaging with how long we had left as assumed it was still 20 years or so but we're down to just 5 years left. That actually feels quite soon relatively speaking 😂 Anyway, definitely raise a glass with your DH. It's a big milestone.

Campervangirl · 29/05/2023 08:00

I feel the same.
I paid mine off last November and it feels like a reason to celebrate, 20 yrs of struggle, worrying about the interest rate, threats of redundancy etc.
I haven't really told anyone apart from immediate family and a couple of friends, had a few comments along the lines of "it's alright for you" and "you're sitting pretty"
The reality is I've really struggled, single parent, shit jobs, childcare issues in the beginning but people act as if the fairies came down in the night and gifted me a house!
Congratulations on paying off your mortgage op

Gemstar2 · 29/05/2023 08:02

Congrats OP, must be a great feeling! I agree with PP that you can both celebrate with a treat in private and still continue to listen with empathy to others. You don’t need to be in the same circumstances as someone else to be able to be a nice friend!

IndexBook · 29/05/2023 08:05

Congratulations @BodgerLovesMashedPotato !

I think it is best not to tell anyone too. A couple of very close friends have worked it out in the last couple of years (only because they know we've been in the house for ages and we are now at an age (50 ish) where it is not in any way unusual) but they don't know that we paid it off many years ago.

DH shared the news with his parents within a couple of months of doing it and they didn't seem that pleased for him, which goes with the MO but it was still quite deflating/sad. They had definitely paid theirs off but they seemed surprised, then slightly annoyed and changed the subject (he left home at 19 and had no financial help from them so not sure what that was about)!

Now we're older the conversation has moved on to pension pots...also best avoided!

TiredOfCleaning · 29/05/2023 08:07

Campervangirl · 29/05/2023 08:00

I feel the same.
I paid mine off last November and it feels like a reason to celebrate, 20 yrs of struggle, worrying about the interest rate, threats of redundancy etc.
I haven't really told anyone apart from immediate family and a couple of friends, had a few comments along the lines of "it's alright for you" and "you're sitting pretty"
The reality is I've really struggled, single parent, shit jobs, childcare issues in the beginning but people act as if the fairies came down in the night and gifted me a house!
Congratulations on paying off your mortgage op

yes this. It's best to not mention it due toreactions like this.

I also agree with a pp that people might ask for loans. I had my aunt and uncle visit a few years ago (they live in myt home country). My uncle looked at our house with an assessing eye and asked 'do you own it or rent?'. I was taken aback and said 'um, own'. That evening he asked us outright to invest in his failing business. (Failing because he is a gambler among other reasons and he narrowly avoided jail for stealing clients money as it turned out).

Also- it can be seen as boasting, even if that is not your intention. I have a friend who openly said she downsized so she could be mortgage free. My response was 'damned sensible' but others got really shirty with her.

gogohmm · 29/05/2023 08:09

Ours is fully paid off and we earn plenty so that the only thing price rises mean is slightly less going into savings. I'm very fortunate

Doyouthinktheyknow · 29/05/2023 08:13

It’s an awesome feeling, congratulations!
You are right, it’s difficult to share because lots of people have huge mortgages these days and times are tough.

I told my mum and dad and that’s it really. It’s been transformative for us though, we’ve been able to save much more and are now benefiting from higher interest rates.

curlycat · 29/05/2023 08:18

We paid ours off a few years ago early. Since then I've continued saving the mortgage amount in a separate account. We're very lucky our mortgage wasn't high and we are in the position to be able to save it. Hoping to do it for the term we should have been paying it for but DH is 2 years off retirement so we'll probably need it by then

3sthemagicnumber · 29/05/2023 08:18

Congratulations!

We have the money sitting waiting to pay it off when our current fixed rate deal finishes next year (would cost more to leave now in early redemption charges).

We have been overpaying for years to clear it before our kids reach university age, but an inheritance means we are in a position to take a year or two off our original plan.

DH and I will definitely celebrate, but won't be telling many people. I believe (though recognize you never know for sure) that our financial situation is a lot easier than many of our friends and, while we work hard, so do they - most of it is down to luck.

We're anticipating a couple of years where we have three kids at university coming up, and I think that'll cost us considerably more than the mortgage does now.