To change my mind about giving free

[StarDolphins]

I know I’m morally going to hell for this.

I’ve made a huge mistake advertising my sofa for free. My new sofa is arriving tomorrow & I panicked because i thought no one would have it as it’s got a broken cushion & cat scratches.

I gave it to this first person that asked even though he had no manners & he’s collecting tomorrow.

I’ve since had 47 messages,one very nice & polite offering £200. I don’t need the money but it’s a great sofa really & I would donate the money to a charity that I know is struggling.

Am I bring unreasonable to give it to the nice woman offering to pay? I know I probably am & I will get flamed!

If you've made a deal with him you shouldn't go back on it imo, even if he was rude you made a deal knowing that he was rude
You can still use the knowledge you've gained to do things differently next time ☝🏻😁

She’s not a scammer, I know both her sons but I will stick to original plan & learn from it.

I once put several thing on freecycle because I had to move to somewhere smaller fairly speedily. The man who came to get some beautiful lined curtains and a dining table was, I am pretty certain , a dealer and would have been quids in. Rather a misuse of Freecycle I think.

Personally I would message the man, tell him you're really sorry but a family member is now needing to sofa so it is no longer available.

I would then contact the woman willing to pay £200 that was polite, let her have it for FREE, and ask her to donate the £200 or a sum of money to charity.

I use Freecycle to get rid of unwanted items that are too good to throw away.
I now wait a while before responding to requests and ignore any that aren't polite.
I do agree that sometimes people try to get things for free to sell on. These often seem to be the first responses you receive to a post.

This is a risk of offering anything for free on Facebook etc. You might end up having to give it to someone you wouldn’t have chosen to, but I agree with others this isn’t worth the headspace. Be glad someone is taking it off your hands and forget about it.

Yes this is what I wanted to do (but would’ve taken the money to give to my choice of charity!) but I’m worried he’ll come to my house as I’ve given him my address so on reflection, not going to be able to do it.

I do have to message him though as I’ve not had a time slot for delivery of my new sofa & I don’t want him to take it until I know the new one is ok etc

i make such silly decisions sometimes but I won’t put anything else good on for free.

Thank you & yes that’s what I shall do!

yes you’re right. I was far too hasty & all I can do is learn from this.

I like how you feel bad for the poor 'young single mum' but what do you actually know about the guys situation? It's shitty to go back on the offer and you know that or you wouldn't have asked.

I think we've all done it though, i put some old toys on Facebook not thinking much of it, sold them to the first person who asked and then started getting messages of people offering double the amount! Lesson learned for me too.

There are many ppl that say they will come etc and then don't. If u already agreed for someone to take it then go with it.

The person that offered money might not even show up. No shows happen a lot when ur trying to sell stuff that ppl have to come to collect.

I think people are weird about this stuff. You wanted the sofa gone so you can receive your new one. Person says I will take the sofa. That's not good enough. Nope. You need please may I have the sofa that isn't good enough for your family but I'm a single mum and my poor children have to sit on the floor and we would be forever in your debt if you let us take away the sofa the you don't want anymore. You are such a great person letting those of us less well off than you remove your old furniture.

I mean I'm all for a please and thank you but on these type of threads it seems like people want some kind of medal for their work with the less fortunate when in reality you just wanted your old furniture gone quickly and hassle free.

I've been in the same situation, offered a nice wooden bookshelf for free I just wanted rid off and the person to offer to take it was quite rude and asking if I had any other stuff.. Anyway I said he could take it all I just wanted it gone.

Then someone else messaged asking if it was still available as her son really wanted it for his stone collection (I'm a geologist so approved) but I had to tell her it was already promised.

Then the first man never turned up! So the nice wee boy got it and brought me a box of chocolates as thanks (which I didn't expect at all). Maybe the same will happen to you...

Wtf OP. Just message and say you have to cancel it, apologise and don't think too much more about it.

Otherwise you are handing a stranger a few hundred pounds out of nothing but awkward embarrassment.

The poor single mums on marketplace are rarely poor, single and sometimes not even mums.
The 200 quid one will disappear or something.
The fact guy didn't use please and thank you on marketplace is really not a sin of a lifetime.

I totally get it OP. I've met some lovely people through giving and receiving things on freecycle groups . I'd say though just stick to the original plan and get rid of the sofa and try not to give it too much headspace. It's a lesson learned and enjoy your new sofa when it arrives

Something for the future - the Britsh Heart Foundation will collect large furniture in some areas to sell in their shops.

I asked if anybody wanted one of those three pot slow cookers, a man said he would have it, after that my friend said she would have liked it. Man said, after handover, "To be honest I'll probably never use it, I just like free stuff" honestly fumed for ages

The man might turn out to be nice. He may not use/type please and thank you until he sees you in person.

I wouldn't be giving much head space to anyone with a bit of a story. I often see posts from a woman near by who puts on the poor mouth and comes across online as mother Theresa and I can tell you she's far from any of those things.

I think I'd just be greatful at having it removed and not having to go down the route of disposing it myself .

Enjoy your new sofa

You're seriously overthinking this.

You wanted the sofa gone and the man has offered to take it off your hands - surely that's the end of it?

You also don't know if the single mum is anymore in need than the man who just happened to "get in" first.

What's wrong? First come, first served. You can't keep everyone on hold hoping a better offer comes along.
You need it gone asap, so he gets it. He might turn out to be really grateful in person, some people don't come across well in messages, and/or can't write very well.
If he lets you down, offer it to the next person. You offered for free, you can't then take money for it.

Message him and say that the new sofa you're expecting is delayed due to whatever reason so unfortunately he cannot collect it.

.I never give the rude ones anything, just message him and say it’s not available anymore then don’t engage with him, or say the new one is delayed in case the lady who’s offering £200 doesn’t turn up. It must be worth something of people are getting excited about it,

Make sure he collects AFTER your new sofa arrives (especially if it's Sofology!) We ordered 3 new sofas a few years ago and on the day they were supposed to arrive, we get a call saying one of the sofas is broken and can they deliver just one, I said no (good job I did as the other would have taken another 17 week to arrive). Luckily we hadn't got rid of the old sofas.
Don't get rid of the old one until you are completely happy with your new one or you may end up without any!

Anyone who replies could be a scammer or a timewaster. If the first guy does turn up, hurray! At least you have backup options if he doesn’t. Just make sure someone is there with you when he’s due round…you do hear unpleasant stories…