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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

School office lost my son's school bag

168 replies

Liglig · 25/05/2023 16:03

AIBU to feel annoyed about a staff member misplacing my son's schoolbag? Unfortunately we got to school and realised we forgot my son's school bag at home, so as I live close by I popped home and dropped my son's school bag into the office to pass it on to his classroom for us, this is not usually a problem and we very rarely do it.

This time the bag didn't make it to the classroom and the lady who took it up went home early so we had to wait days for her to come in again as she does not work everyday.

When she finally turns up the office says the lady cannot remember where she took my son's bag to. We waited days just to get this reply. AIBU to think they could of phoned her up and asked her on the day the bag went missing where she put it? Maybe she would've known and remembered while it was fresh in her mind, but instead they waited days until she forgot.

I went to the head teacher and they just keep saying they'll look out for it and that there is nothing else they can really do. I describe the bag as blue and black everyday and still each time office staff as if it's blue and yellow, they don't take note of what I say.

AIBU that this person who lost my son's schoolbag is not being held accountable. I feel like I'm just being fobbed off, not even had any apologies or anything, his bag had a PE kit and his reading record in there which would've been nice to keep as it is his last year there. I am not financially well off as now I have to buy another bag and a set of PE clothes just for the last 2 months he has at this school and the reading records I usually like to keep for keepsake.

Sorry this is so long I don't know how to type in a nutshell and end up typing a novel.

OP posts:
Original poster
Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:05

HelpSendGin · 25/05/2023 18:03

Depending on the size of the school there may be between 200-600 pupils in the school and you will not have been the only parent to 'forget' and drop something in.

Would you like the office staff member to lose their job over it...or better be hung drawn and quartered after a public shaming?!

No of course I don't but a simple apology or acknowledgement wouldn't go amiss.

OP posts:
Starhead69 · 25/05/2023 18:07

Liglig · 25/05/2023 16:03

AIBU to feel annoyed about a staff member misplacing my son's schoolbag? Unfortunately we got to school and realised we forgot my son's school bag at home, so as I live close by I popped home and dropped my son's school bag into the office to pass it on to his classroom for us, this is not usually a problem and we very rarely do it.

This time the bag didn't make it to the classroom and the lady who took it up went home early so we had to wait days for her to come in again as she does not work everyday.

When she finally turns up the office says the lady cannot remember where she took my son's bag to. We waited days just to get this reply. AIBU to think they could of phoned her up and asked her on the day the bag went missing where she put it? Maybe she would've known and remembered while it was fresh in her mind, but instead they waited days until she forgot.

I went to the head teacher and they just keep saying they'll look out for it and that there is nothing else they can really do. I describe the bag as blue and black everyday and still each time office staff as if it's blue and yellow, they don't take note of what I say.

AIBU that this person who lost my son's schoolbag is not being held accountable. I feel like I'm just being fobbed off, not even had any apologies or anything, his bag had a PE kit and his reading record in there which would've been nice to keep as it is his last year there. I am not financially well off as now I have to buy another bag and a set of PE clothes just for the last 2 months he has at this school and the reading records I usually like to keep for keepsake.

Sorry this is so long I don't know how to type in a nutshell and end up typing a novel.

@Liglig

Don’t buy a new PE kit which he’ll get 6 weeks wear from. If they complain about him not being in uniform explain you can’t afford to replace the one they lost.

the reading record will never get read, honestly

Original poster
Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:07

salmonlinguineplease · 25/05/2023 17:54

Coffeetree exactly they are professional adults, with lots of important work to do, who should not be tasked with getting belongings to children who forget them. Yes they should say no, ( they don't because can you imagine how OP would have reacted in the school office if they had) because by trying to help out they get accused of stealing a PE bag.

If they told me no they won't take the bag then I would happily accept their wishes actually. We are not all agressive shouty parents btw.

OP posts:
HelpSendGin · 25/05/2023 18:08

So why use the loaded language of 'held accountable' if all you want is an apology?

They've said they'll look for it, what more do you want? Things happen in school and they have their job to do as office staff and perhaps they were prioritising that.

MayBeeJuneSoon · 25/05/2023 18:09

Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:04

A comment that another member here said, made me mention stealing as they suggested that maybe they were "correcting my mistake" I can only assume they reckon the staff deliberately held back the bag to teach me a lesson or stole it,that is where that comment came up in response to that.

Don't be so bloody ridiculous!

Coffeetree · 25/05/2023 18:10

salmonlinguineplease · 25/05/2023 17:54

Coffeetree exactly they are professional adults, with lots of important work to do, who should not be tasked with getting belongings to children who forget them. Yes they should say no, ( they don't because can you imagine how OP would have reacted in the school office if they had) because by trying to help out they get accused of stealing a PE bag.

They should never have agreed to take it then. If it was too difficult to bring a bag to a kid.

MayBeeJuneSoon · 25/05/2023 18:11

Sockpuppeting going on in this thread!! 😆

Coffeetree · 25/05/2023 18:15

I don't think the staff stole it but more likely some dummy on staff brought it to the wrong place, dumped it, and then another kid nicked it.

Sandylanes69 · 25/05/2023 18:15

Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:04

A comment that another member here said, made me mention stealing as they suggested that maybe they were "correcting my mistake" I can only assume they reckon the staff deliberately held back the bag to teach me a lesson or stole it,that is where that comment came up in response to that.

Paranoid much?

DelphiniumBlue · 25/05/2023 18:22

Are you actually saying that the member of staff should have been contacted on a non-working day to check where the bag was? I can't imagine that being acceptable in any workplace.

mathanxiety · 25/05/2023 18:34

The school should apologise. They should also spring for a new PE kit. Losing a child's bag is sheer incompetence.

Is there no tannoy system? No way of making announcements for the school? If there is, it would have been easy to summon DS to the office to pick up his bag, and the embarrassment might have made him remember it next time.

mathanxiety · 25/05/2023 18:36

And of course an employee could have been contacted after she kept the school. What if she had been entrusted with a child's inhaler or some such item?

MayBeeJuneSoon · 25/05/2023 18:37

Can you imagine schools reimbursing for every lost item?

EasterBreak · 25/05/2023 18:40

10 years ago my sons school office lost his whole SEN file full of reports and information. It never did turn up.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 25/05/2023 18:42

mathanxiety · 25/05/2023 18:34

The school should apologise. They should also spring for a new PE kit. Losing a child's bag is sheer incompetence.

Is there no tannoy system? No way of making announcements for the school? If there is, it would have been easy to summon DS to the office to pick up his bag, and the embarrassment might have made him remember it next time.

Oh god this is a great suggestion…

Teacher: ok class we’re going to start the new chapter on Saturn tod-
Announcement: Please send Jimmy to the office to collect his school bag
Teacher: as I was saying, we’re talking about Saturn today…it’s the distinct plane-
Announcement: Please send Susan to the office …her mother dropped off her reading homework
Teacher: Rings… Saturn has ri-
Announcement: Kent is needed in the office to collect his dinner money

LookItsMeAgain · 25/05/2023 18:42

user1497787065 · 25/05/2023 17:44

I’ve worked in a school office and it was so tiresome dealing with parents
like you. The onus is on you as a parent to provide your child with what he needs and it is not the responsibility of the school staff to drop things off with children that have been forgotten. 600 pupils, imagine if the school admin staff were asked to deliver forgotten items to even 5% of the staff?

My heart bleeds for you. Not.

Cocopogo · 25/05/2023 18:42

“We forgot my sons school bag” he’s in Year 6, surely you mean he forgot it and it sounds like it’s happened more than once too. So instead of holding the office staff accountable why don’t you use that energy to figure out what is going wrong in the mornings and sort it out.

LAlady · 25/05/2023 18:50

I assume it was all items were named, including the bag. The amount of parents who think that unnamed items will find the way to their owner is unbelievable. In which case, I'm sure they will find their way back to you.

This is a major frustration of our reception staff - the onus is on students to remember their items. We don't have the capacity or resources to deliver items to classrooms.

Original poster
Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:52

Cocopogo · 25/05/2023 18:42

“We forgot my sons school bag” he’s in Year 6, surely you mean he forgot it and it sounds like it’s happened more than once too. So instead of holding the office staff accountable why don’t you use that energy to figure out what is going wrong in the mornings and sort it out.

Yes 3 times in all the years he has been there, wow excuse us for being human and very rarely daring to forget something, our mornings are very organized thank you and this has not happened to us for years now but this time it did, gasp!

OP posts:
Original poster
Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:54

LAlady · 25/05/2023 18:50

I assume it was all items were named, including the bag. The amount of parents who think that unnamed items will find the way to their owner is unbelievable. In which case, I'm sure they will find their way back to you.

This is a major frustration of our reception staff - the onus is on students to remember their items. We don't have the capacity or resources to deliver items to classrooms.

Yes my son's name is also written on each piece of his pe clothes, uniform etc.

OP posts:
GreenWheat · 25/05/2023 18:57

It's a bit slapdash of them but it's just one of those things. Annoying that you forgot the bag, annoying that they subsequently lost track of it. Our school is way smaller than yours and never makes any guarantees about lost property or keeping track of pupils' stuff. As PP have said, don't buy new PE kit just for these few weeks. But a word for the future - a lot more stuff goes walkabout at secondary school!

itsgettingweird · 25/05/2023 18:59

Highlyflavouredgravy · 25/05/2023 16:48

If you hadn't forgotten it in the first place then it wouldn't have happened. Why is ok for you to forget something but not the member of staff?

Yep.

Exactly my thought as I read it.

And unless your DS has send then it's actually him who lost the bag because at 10yo he should have picked it up himself.

How's he going to cope in secondary school if he can't remember a bag?

Sandylanes69 · 25/05/2023 19:01

mathanxiety · 25/05/2023 18:36

And of course an employee could have been contacted after she kept the school. What if she had been entrusted with a child's inhaler or some such item?

She wasn't though, was she?

Sandylanes69 · 25/05/2023 19:03

Liglig · 25/05/2023 18:52

Yes 3 times in all the years he has been there, wow excuse us for being human and very rarely daring to forget something, our mornings are very organized thank you and this has not happened to us for years now but this time it did, gasp!

Show quote history

Shame you don't extend that leeway to other humans - is it only you who are allowed to make mistakes?

Original poster
Liglig · 25/05/2023 19:05

itsgettingweird · 25/05/2023 18:59

Yep.

Exactly my thought as I read it.

And unless your DS has send then it's actually him who lost the bag because at 10yo he should have picked it up himself.

How's he going to cope in secondary school if he can't remember a bag?

Show quote history

This happened after many years of not leaving his school bag at home by mistake, people are going on as if he loses it everyday. He does not, so going on about how will he cope in secondary is not relevant plus I won't be able to be dropping bags I to school should they be forgotten in the future. The primary school is literally a stone throw away from me which is why I took the bag in, they could say no if they wish but they didn't and agreed to make sure the bag got to him.

OP posts:
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