School office lost my son's school bag

[Liglig]

AIBU to feel annoyed about a staff member misplacing my son's schoolbag? Unfortunately we got to school and realised we forgot my son's school bag at home, so as I live close by I popped home and dropped my son's school bag into the office to pass it on to his classroom for us, this is not usually a problem and we very rarely do it.

This time the bag didn't make it to the classroom and the lady who took it up went home early so we had to wait days for her to come in again as she does not work everyday.

When she finally turns up the office says the lady cannot remember where she took my son's bag to. We waited days just to get this reply. AIBU to think they could of phoned her up and asked her on the day the bag went missing where she put it? Maybe she would've known and remembered while it was fresh in her mind, but instead they waited days until she forgot.

I went to the head teacher and they just keep saying they'll look out for it and that there is nothing else they can really do. I describe the bag as blue and black everyday and still each time office staff as if it's blue and yellow, they don't take note of what I say.

AIBU that this person who lost my son's schoolbag is not being held accountable. I feel like I'm just being fobbed off, not even had any apologies or anything, his bag had a PE kit and his reading record in there which would've been nice to keep as it is his last year there. I am not financially well off as now I have to buy another bag and a set of PE clothes just for the last 2 months he has at this school and the reading records I usually like to keep for keepsake.

Sorry this is so long I don't know how to type in a nutshell and end up typing a novel.

Well I guess stealing or making a child's bag deliberately is a really great thing for the staff to do then right! 😏 way to go! It's not right to do that even if you think it'll teach someone a lesson. It's just dishonest.

I always assume that anything lost in a school or hospital will never be seen again. They’re like black holes.

Oh for goodness sake get over yourself 😄

It's not " victim blaming". Your son and/or you, forgot a bag, someone tried to help, despite it being no part of their job. Your son did not take responsibility for his belongings and get them to where they needed to be, don't blame anyone else. You absolutely do not need to buy a new PE kit at this stage of the year and keeping reading records as sentimental keep sake, for year 6!!

Clearly I'm in the minority here - but I think it's fair enough being annoyed about his bag going missing. There will be plenty of families out there who cannot afford to buy another bag, even a second hand one from a charity shop, or replace even a pencil case in the bag.

Also, where is the respect for your son's possessions from the school. I understand your annoyance at an adult losing the bag - you trusted them with it. You thought you were handing it over to someone who you could rely on. If you'd handed it over to a child in the school to pass on, then yeah, that would have been poor judgement on your part.

An apology would have gone a long way - I don't understand why people are so incapable of apologising when they've made a mistake or even trying to empathise.

It sounds like there's very little you can do in this situation unfortunately. It's crap that his reading record is lost too. Your son will have other pieces of work over his upcoming years in school which will be important keepsakes 😊

Don’t buy new stuff. This will probably turn up at the very end of term in the big collection of lost property when all the teachers are having a clear out.

Wow anyone would think we forgot the bag every day with your comment. At the end of they day I'm sure you or anyone else would be a bit pissed off if responsible adults added to your one off event of forgetting the bag and trying to put things right quickly by handing it in. Can you honestly say you would be happy at somebody losing your child's items whether it is or isn't your fault?

So. Ow this poor woman that you wanted harassed on day off is deliberately stealing your kids bag?

OP, you may have been understood for being annoyed but you’ve now gone round the bend with your comments.

I think you sound like every school office worker's nightmare.

You lost me at saying they should call her when she isn't in work. You need to get over it OP, it's frustrating but you have 2 months left. Move on.

It's definitely inconvenient and probably costs money to replace, so I see why you're annoyed.

However, I'd let it go. Schools are busy places. Receptionists in schools can be absolutely run off their feet. She may have been sick or had a family emergency which meant she had to leave early that day and that would explain her forgetfulness maybe.

I'd just chalk it up to experience and be really careful not to forget things.

I work in a secondary school office and cover reception sometimes. We are told never to accept anything to give to a student as they should be bringing everything. We make exceptions sometimes but we aren't really supposed to. This is probably one of the reasons why! It might get lost and then it'd be our fault in the parents' eyes.

I work in a school and am always surprised at the number of bags/PE kits/lunchboxes that disappear. They almost always turn up eventually despite everywhere have been searched at least once before.

and to pp who say it's the OPs fault for forgetting it in the first place. Bollocks.

I’ve worked in a school office and it was so tiresome dealing with parents
like you. The onus is on you as a parent to provide your child with what he needs and it is not the responsibility of the school staff to drop things off with children that have been forgotten. 600 pupils, imagine if the school admin staff were asked to deliver forgotten items to even 5% of the staff?

Tbf OP it's soooo obnoxious of them. Like if they weren't going to bother getting it to him they shouldn't have taken it off you to begin with.

And now they can't be arsed? Honestly if I misplaced someone's bag I'd be mortified and I'd be tripping over myself trying to locate it. Yes your son should've remembered it but this is a team of professional adults who said they'd bring it to him.

Looks like they brought it to the wrong place and now someone's nicked it and they're covering up by pretending to continue looking for it.

Send him to PE in whatever he wants to wear and if anyone says anything tell them they shouldn't have lost his stuff. Dummies.

Yeah but if that's the case, surely they could just refuse to take it?

Instead of passive aggressively making a half-arsed attempt to deliver it and then acting confused about why it's lost?

Surely if you take something of some value off a parent and then undertake to actually bring it to a specific kid you need to do that?

Thank you to those who gave some constructive feedback and advice I appreciate it. As for others I have no words, just congratulations on making an upsetting situation feel a whole lot worse. Good luck to you when you dare to next make a mistake and have someone else add to it.

What I can’t work out is what the OP wants the school to do? As I said, annoying that it happened. The bag is lost, it will either turn up eventually or it won’t. (I’m assuming the child doesn’t attend Hogwarts where a quick wave of a wand could resolve the situation.). My guess is that in some random classroom there is a bag that won’t be noticed until the classrooms are emptied at the end of the school year. Isn’t that the most likely scenario?

As for the theft angle that keeps being trotted out…who is going to want to steal a bag with grotty PE clothes? Is there high demand for this on some weird black market?

Coffeetree exactly they are professional adults, with lots of important work to do, who should not be tasked with getting belongings to children who forget them. Yes they should say no, ( they don't because can you imagine how OP would have reacted in the school office if they had) because by trying to help out they get accused of stealing a PE bag.

Oh please, nobody has 'stolen' it!!

It's one bag of many! It will turn up

Love how you go straight to staff to blame!

OP, we're the individual PE items labelled? Have you searched for the individually as well as looking for the bag with its full contents?

It's really just one of those things.

Your "grotty" comment is so not necessary. A comment from another person on here suggesting that " someone correcting my mistake for me" is what made me assume they were suggesting that the staff deliberately "misplaced my son's bag or stole it" that's how that reply of mine came up.

Depending on the size of the school there may be between 200-600 pupils in the school and you will not have been the only parent to 'forget' and drop something in.

Would you like the office staff member to lose their job over it...or better be hung drawn and quartered after a public shaming?!

A comment that another member here said, made me mention stealing as they suggested that maybe they were "correcting my mistake" I can only assume they reckon the staff deliberately held back the bag to teach me a lesson or stole it,that is where that comment came up in response to that.

’big school’ 🙄