To tell you the school does not decide when your child can walk home alone

[Itisuptoyou]

I keep seeing this on threads and I don’t want to derail what the thread is about.

But the school cannot decide this. You do as parent. It may be you are broadly in agreement with the school and I am but this is your choice and not the schools.

It irrationally annoys me when people claim ‘the schools don’t allow …’ Not up to the school!

Completely agree. Our school had always made you think it wasn't allowed. Then a year 5 in my childs class starting collecting their year 1 sibling to walk home and the mum had to basically demand they let the kids leave.

It seems to me with some recent experiences that parenting and indeed schooling is getting increasingly polarised. Schools have got a lot of pressure from outside to ensure they're operating appropriately - OFSTED deeming you have safeguarding issues can lead to requires improvement grading in a flash I hear. Understandably I think schools will look to protect themselves, hopefully in most cases without alienating their parents. Same goes for attendance, schools are under huge pressure from LA and government because so many children are not attending school (a whole range of reasons for this and many threads will have discussed this), so parents are getting daft responses from school (like refusing a funeral) - the whole thing is broken.
Our school had a safeguarding incident where a year 1 child took it upon themselves to leave the playground on their own and walked home, crossing a number of busy roads, while the parent was still in the playground waiting for them. Consequently school then overhauled the process for children leaving and arriving on the premises - adults on the gates at start and end of school to monitor anyone arriving/leaving alone, Adults on the classroom door who have to dismiss the child to a waiting adult, who is listed with school at start of the year. If they're going home with someone different school has to be notified.
Year 5 and 6 are allowed to be independent travellers - parents give permission at the start of the year that their child can be dismissed at the end of the day or arrive at school on their own.
I am sure our school would be supportive if I someone needed a variation to these ways of operating. I think it's easier to be flexible by exception, rather than firmer by exception. I can imagine there could be instances of children with challenging parental/family situations where you would not want the child to be picked up by others, even if known to the child.
There's a fine line between being respectful and responsible of boundaries and rules and teaching our kids that they can't just do whatever they like (the rules don't apply to them) and making sure you've got critical thinkers who can make good decisions.

Indo worry about the amount of parenting we seem to be happy to outsource to schools. I mean its all very well when it works for you. Your kids have to havw schools means or the lunch box policy means you dont have make lunches or you dont have to explain why they can't have the same chocolate bar as Sammy. But when your kid has to get wet feet in flimsy shoes or cant possibly do something normal like walk home at an age where many children in many other places have already been doing it fir years it bites you on the arse.

The amount of power we let schools have over our children is beyond a joke. 14/15 year olds are old enough to baby sit. Like fuck should they not be able to grab their sister and walk 50 metres to their house. Who do they think they are.

This - we need a conversation to happen sensibly. Schools are overwhelmed, parents unempowered.

It also turns everything into a battle.

Parents and schools are being set up to constantly feel undermined or antagonised by the other. Rather than as part of a team each with jobs to do in the child’s life.

During the pandemic times when I was supposed to wait 20 minutes between pivk

Picking up child 1 and child 2, I said my 10 year old (year 5) was walking home himself as I couldn't take a half hour out of work.

Headteacher tried to stop me but I stuck to my guns. Then the other parents started copying me. Nothing she could do about it.

I'm a great worrier. Knowing (thinking) that my daughter walked home from school with her older brother, and phoned me at work when she arrived, I worried less. And they used to come home with a crowd if noisy children.