To wonder if I actually have ADHD after all?

[FlipsFlops]

I was diagnosed with ADHD last year at a private clinic after getting nowhere with the NHS. I did a fair bit of research and went to a named psychiatrist who specialises in treating ADHD and went in with an open mind not necessarily expecting a diagnosis.

Somewhat to my surprise I was diagnosed very quickly (I'd filled in lots of very lengthy forms before my assessment and off the back of that was told I was a clear cut case), and strongly encouraged to try medication (I haven't yet).

It's taken a bit of courage to tell family and friends - some have been supportive, some a bit sceptical ("but you seem completely normal?" "yeah I've seen all those TikTok videos too").

I still struggle a bit accepting the diagnosis and am prone to beating myself up about it (it's not ADHD, I'm just lazy, don't try hard enough, etc...).

Then I've seen this BBC news report today about the "ADHD private diagnosis scandal" suggesting people are being diagnosed by private clinics who don't actually have ADHD.

ADHD: Private clinics exposed by BBC undercover investigation - BBC News

Have I just been taken in by all the TikTok nonsense (even though I don't use TikTok) and exploited by an industry trying to sell me expensive drugs?

Or do I have a genuine neurological condition that's being called into question by journalists looking to turn everything into a some kind of scandal?

I don't honestly know what to think any more.

Was it Professor Nutt? They will. That's why they're currency in Universities around exam time and if you're depressed, they'll give you the motivation to get up and do something.

But it's a fine balance and there are always side effects. And if youre anxious, they'll likely make you feel extremely shit.

Agree 100%.

I know it's hard to do but if you want, pursue it. Ask for a referral to be considered again and look at the DIVA interview and see how many criteria you would fulfil in childhood and adulthood and use that as a framework, and ask for a detailed reason why you were rejected for assessment.

Do you have any school reports? Even if they said you got an A in every subject, mentions of day-dreaming, being late, speaking out of turn, losing things, being disorganised etc can all point to the potential of ADHD.

I'm wondering how Psychiatry UK doing assessments on behalf of the NHS fits into this? They can't be the hours-long appointment and travel through medical records that has been described above as the in-house NHS method?

My GP has referred me via this route, mainly I think because I asked and there was no other appropriate provision for anxiety and depression that she could refer me for.

I’m really sorry to hear that. It’s a risk with mood stabilisers and you can’t mess with that side effect.

Hats off to you doing all this without meds!

This is where DS is having issues. He's underperforming by some margin at school BUT he is hitting all his targets and is regarded as 'at expected level'. He should be exceeding though.

I did key stage 1 papers at home with him before his SATs. He was doing stupid mistakes because he wasn't concerntrating and was missing out whole pages without realising.

At school they are saying he is verbally exceeding but on paper they can't record it because he isn't doing work because he can't hold his concerntration for more than five mins without the teacher reminding him to do his work.

He also gets in a fluster saying he can't do the work so doesn't do it. Even though if you calm him down he can do it. A couple of sessions with the Sen ta for English has seen an improvement in his confidence and his work.

DH didn't do any homework or school work. But could ace exams.

Likewise I could walk into an exam without any revisions and just do it because I remember everything. I struggled with revision as it didn't help and I just wound myself up with it. Coursework was a nightmare (and still to this day gives me nightmares). It was pretty typical for me to wake up at 5am on the day coursework was due, and write it then and there and hand it in that day.

That didn't work so well for a level. Particularly a level art. My predicted grades were AAB. I got BBD. I got on a very sort after degree course though. And again under performed on that. Due to coursework.

It leaves really bright people up shit creek. The diagnosis criteria almost means it says you can't be ADHD and bright. Which is bollocks.

We are only getting assessed for DS because he's at a borderline point and we've been warned it's unusual for child who are performing at the expected level. I am fully expecting it to be thrown out the window tbh. His teacher really does think there is an issue - but we don't know where that leaves him next year with a new teacher. It could be pot luck. We could be fighting all sorts of appeals.

I know SOMETHING is affecting my life to the point I can't do normal things.

I worked in a job with deadlines for a decade that doesn't help because it doesn't fit with ADHD. Except for the fact I had to drop to part time...

I know it's really common to have misdiagnosis for years - my medical history would support that to a degree I think. But the answers I've given before probably don't really reflect things either.

As for getting someone from your childhood to do things. There is no way I would let my mum anywhere near that. And I don't really have anyone else who could fill it in. So I'm screwed.

I am despairing over all of this today. It just feels like I'm doomed in limbo and DS is probably screwed too.

Totally agree with this.

You've summed up exactly how I feel @Feelinadequate23.

It's given me another thing to procrastinate over.

Do you have any school reports? Even if they said you got an A in every subject, mentions of day-dreaming, being late, speaking out of turn, losing things, being disorganised etc can all point to the potential of ADHD.

No one notice me at school. All my reports say 'very quiet should speak up more'. And that's about it. I was unbelievably disorganised, and had total meltdowns over it because I was terrified of not having things for school. So I'd always have them in school. I struggled with friends but was also friendly with everyone at the same time.

I'd love to try the meds @gamerchick to see if they help. I'm impatient and can't be bothered to wait. I just want the help. Now!

what to you really know about the adults who you think are claiming to have ADHD because it’s “trendy”? Do you know them well, do you live with them and see their lives behind closed doors? You don’t really know at all.

Also, why would these people spend so much money on diagnosis and private prescriptions for 'attention'?

It's a lot of hard work

Everyone that is doubting booking an assessment or doubting the results I would look in to the clinic & reputation as not all private clinics will behave like this. Sadly the problem with exposé’s like this is they cast doubt over all private diagnoses.

The real scandal here is the lack of access to NHS mental health services.

BINGO

Of all the children I have worked with who received a diagnosis, medication and an EHCP, the overwhelming majority had very significant trauma. Not surprisingly, medication didn’t make a great deal of difference. I have observed some children who received a diagnosis and meds and it did make a massive difference in their academic progress in the short term.

Explain to me in layman’s terms how someone who gets top marks in their A levels might also have ADHD?

I certainly struggle more since having children and I wonder if some of the birth trauma is either why I struggle so much or has somehow triggered a trauma response.

I had lots of small t trauma as a child and had some damaging relationships as an adult. What I've read about the connections with trauma and ADHD makes me feel confused and I.move on to something simpler rather than pursue help.

That's okay. School reports can be incredibly helpful but not always essential. Though school reports that clearly stated the opposite of potential ADHD symptoms rather than just not mentioning much, could possibly be detrimental if provided.

One of my reasons for not seeking a referral for diagnosis is my fear of 'jumping on the bandwagon'. I'm fearful of being told I'm silly or wrong.

How does your DD feel since taking g the medication @Creamcrackersandricecakes?

I had a private assessment and subsequent diagnosis. I definitely have ADHD though and it worries me that I won't be believed - I have bad imposter syndrome as it is. My psychiatrist works in the NHS and privately, the assessment is the same. I have struggled all my life with ASD and ADHD and I fell like I'm back to square one in terms of being believed and understood

The state of the NHS and the inability of some to access to the support they need is nothing short of a national scandal. People shouldn't have to be forced to go private. As I said it was undoubtedly undiagnosed in the past but that doesn't takeaway from the fact that there are increasing numbers who say they have it but they don't.

Unfortunately my views may be somewhat influenced by several in my social circle who I know extremely well. They insist they have ADHD. They haven't. They don't just have an absence of symptoms they have the polar opposite. I actually find it incredibly offensive.

It may be distasteful but there is a Tik Tok effect and some people want a label at any cost.

@LostMyUserName - she's still at the stage where they're adjusting the dose / type etc, as she only started taking them a couple of weeks ago. Not a huge difference as yet, but she does say she feels more focused in the afternoons, (previously, as she became tired throughout the day, her focus would really wander in the afternoons, particularly if it was a subject she wasn't that interested in). We haven't had any negative side effects at all, which is a relief. She's on Concerta 27mg.

Being very bright? Luck? Many clever kids with ADHD get by using techniques they evolve themselves to get through, and only crash when they just won't work any more.

I made it to university before that happened to me.

I have a private diagnosis but I got it in a different country where healthcare is mostly private and health insurance covered the diagnostic process, face to face with a specialist psychiatrist and carried out according to best practice, including a corroborative interview with someone who knew me when I was younger. The diagnosis was life changing but reading through this thread I wouldn't have got near a referral on the NHS.

For me, drugs don't do much. I'd like to try again and am in what I'm told is a two-year wait to access NHS services here for medication. My psychiatrist though did tell me that a significant number of people come to her for diagnosis after taking speed to get themselves through exams and realising what a huge difference it makes to them. It really does affect ADHD brains differently. I was taking what a friend told me was a very hefty recreational amount while I titrated originally, and I felt pretty much nothing.

My biggest regret is not seeking an assessment when I had my ‘lightbulb moment’ after stumbling across an article on MN 5 years ago. I would have been assessed through the NHS much quicker, and not have the whole ‘it’s just TikTok’ argument thrown at me as I’d have a more ‘believeable’ diagnosis.

Due to my procrastination in seeking it (ha!) waiting lists in my area had quadrupled by the time I reached my breaking point and got myself in gear to request it from the GP. I then gave in and sought a private diagnosis after 6 months because I was struggling so much in a new job.

I’m still in the titration process, it’s been nearly 6 months of trying different medication and weekly reports. I’m not made of money and it isn’t cheap, so the idea that ‘everyone thinks they have ADHD now’ is so insulting to me.

Because you can just be really bright with natural exam performance skills but otherwise coast

Or you have parents at home that designed a revision schedule and home is really regimented, organised and controlled even if you aren't. So all you have to focus on is academic work, everything else is done for you

Or you have a girlfriend/boyfriend who helped (or did) a lot of the coursework for you.

Or you made up some lie to submit your coursework late.

Or you left everything to the last minute and then pulled some all nighters because the way your brain works is you're much more efficient, calmer and more focused when you have high levels of adrenaline.

Lots of people with ADHD are amazingly productive and effective in high-stress situations but not so much in 'normal life'.

I know someone with ADHD who makes a very good living in a dangerous sport. He doesn't take his meds on the days he does the sport because he'll think WTF am I doing? This is dangerous! But without meds his ADHD brain means the adrenaline makes him feel calm and focused doing dangerous things. But he has to employ a secretary to do the admin side of his job because he's a complete shambles at that.