To not feed DS pasta for every meal

[PastaMonsta]

Yet another meal wasted because DS decided he didn’t like it. The list of foods he wants to eat is getting smaller and smaller. Today he decreed unless the meal is pasta based (spaghetti bolognaise, spaghetti carbonara, macaroni cheese) he won’t eat it.

Asides from the fact no one else in the family wants to eat pasta for every meal it’s just not healthy. AIBU? And can you think of any meal suggestions he might like that are like pasta but not?

For context he’s in Y5, has ASD, and is on the 99% percentile for BMI

Serve up your regular family meals, if he’s hungry he will have to eat it. I wouldn’t pander to it myself. He’s obviously not going to starve is he.

He has ASD. I think you're being unhelpful here, picking a pointless battle.

Pasta is healthy enough. What does he eat with it - will he eat other sauces?

Make food a battleground at your own peril.

As he's got ASD I'd be inclined to go along with it. What you describe here isn't terribly unbalanced, in the grand scheme of things. I assume you can get veg into the bolognese? That one is also batch cook friendly.

🙄

You can do a lot of variety with pasta. I’d try to compromise - he can have pasta but not the same pasta meal each night.

Well it’s healthier than not eating and it’s something that can be mixed up a fair bit.

is it really worth getting into a battle of wills over?

When you say every meal, do you mean he wants pasta for breakfast, lunch and dinner?

Ohh and cook your regular meals, but just swap out his carbs for plain pasta. I’ve got a child that won’t eat potato or rice so he has pasta with whatever we’re having. Curry and pasta. Roast dinner and pasta. It’s just a carb option.

You've clearly got no understanding of ASD at all.

Look up ARFAID it’s a form of disordered eating.

When my DS was young and in the fussy food phase ( I understand this is different) I’d purée uncooked green veg and stir them into his Bolognaise sauce so I knew he was getting some iron and vitamins. Away from him seeing, of course.
Years later older DS told him!

Yes, it’s not really worth the battle is it? I just worry about his weight. He already will only drink milk and has grated cheese with every meal.

He eats weetabix for breakfast with grapes. Lunch is usually meat/cheese with cucumber and tomatoes as he doesn’t like bread. He love most fruit.

Can you not batch cook and freeze the things he will eat and then serve them up when the family is having something he doesn’t like?

I’m an adult with no disorders or neurodiversity of any kind; but sometimes, I just want to eat what I want to eat even if I’ve already had it for the four previous days. I don’t see the point in battling over food. Let him grow out of it / explore new foods in his own time and give him what adults take for granted in the meantime: agency in choosing what you have for dinner.

It may be limited in variety but it sounds like nutritionally it’s covering most things so personally I would go with it. Provide opportunity to try new things but don’t make an issue of it either way

My daughter is the same with pasta. Pasta pesto over and over and over….

I just make our normal meals but give her a little pasta on the side. Occassionally she has tried things and has now some more foods she likes. It’s ALWAYS on her terms though. If we suggest trying a bite or anything she won’t.

*Yes, it’s not really worth the battle is it? I just worry about his weight. He already will only drink milk and has grated cheese with every meal.

He eats weetabix for breakfast with grapes. Lunch is usually meat/cheese with cucumber and tomatoes as he doesn’t like bread. He love most fruit*

That doesn't sound too bad a diet tbh, my DD is a nightmare with food and only eat cheese pasta for dinner. Very occasionally a bite of something like a chicken nugget. No vegetables. Some fruit. No cereal. Same with only drinking milk but she wants it warmed and from a particular cup with a straw 🙄

It is worrying about his weight - my DD is the opposite in that she's very skinny and just hardly eats anything. We silently celebrate every calorie. Is he active and sporty?

I tried this with my picky dd and she went 7 days eating only her breakfast before I caved because Hangry isn't conducive to happy houses.

It's trotted out as the solution very lazily

Sorry I didn’t really answer. Given your child has ASD I’m assuming the limited diet is related to that. So I’d personally make sure they did have some pasta. I wouldn’t refuse to make it, but I would make a basic pasta, like pasta pesto, and do it alongside the meals everyone else is having. .

Serve the normal meal, with a small serving of pasta on the side. I wouldn't stop serving him the same as everyone else as exposure to different food is beneficial.

Your choices are let him eat pasta or watch him refuse and waste the food really. If he is overweight, make sure he is getting reasonable portion sizes. Can you hide veg in the sauces without him knowing? Cauliflower or butternut puree in macaroni cheese. Bolognaise can hide loads of veg and mushrooms in the sauce. Batch cook and freeze individual portions, so no one else needs to have it.

One thing that can help my DD is having a sectioned plate. She will sometimes want a 'surprise plate' of different foods in the sections. It's mostly just stuff I know she'll eat but I sometimes put something new on it. Ours are from B&M and are a hit with all my kids.

This is what over seen most professionals advise. Give them their safe food with small
amounts of different foods so they can try them without feeling overwhelmed. It’s, sort, worked for us in that our daughter now randomly likes Salmon too ( of course it had t be something super expensive)

Pasta will only contribute to his weight if you serve it up in a calorie laden sauce. I load everything with veggies which thins it out. We all Iove pasta in our house and none of us are overweight.

Perhaps it’s because pasta is very samey he knows what to expect? Unless it’s McDonald’s Fries potatoes can be very variable.

Please ignore this terrible advice, it's dangerous and could very easily lead to an eating disorder.

Op there was a thread on AIBU a few days ago about fussy eating, I suggest you find it and have a read through, it will be enlightening for you. In fact you too @Livinginanotherworld there's no excuse for ignorance in this day and age.