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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I leave a negative review for this soft play?

58 replies

Razputini · 10/05/2023 18:04

Hi, I feel like I'm needing a bit of reassurance here, I hate to be the bad guy and I hate leaving negative reviews for places especially since this is a new soft play starting out so I'm doubting myself about doing this, but I'm feeling a bit frustrated at the moment. I have emetophobia (fear of vomiting) so that doesn't help the situation.

Today when I took my daughter to soft play for a birthday party and young boy (looked about 10 years old) projectile vomited everywhere, he was taken away by family and cleaned up for 1 min, then ran straight back into the soft play, same clothes and all. None of the staff seemed bothered by this! I spoke to a staff member (I believe the owner but I'm not certain) voicing my concerns over the health and safety of the other children in the play area, and she told me that she had spoken to the family but they didn't want to leave. I replied that it isn't the choice of the family and the establishment has a duty of care for the other children and they make the rules, not the customers, but wasn't given any further comment aside from 'there are lots of bugs going around at the moment'. Surely with that being the case you have a duty to ensure the wellbeing of others visiting and stop the cycle of bugs going around?

AIBU to leave a negative review over this? I know rationally it's probably right but I'm doubting myself so much so I need a second opinion 😩

OP posts:
greenlychee · 10/05/2023 18:05

I think I would put a complaint in writing to them and see how they respond. Rather than go for the big online review option. Give them a chance first; they might realise the error of their ways and change their policies.

greenlychee · 10/05/2023 18:06

If they don't respond suitably to the written complaint, then maybe take it further with a review! I agree it is bad though, if they were at school they would be sent home for two days to avoid spreading it.

tikkanaan · 10/05/2023 18:07

That is disgusting

MargaretThursday · 10/05/2023 18:09

How do they make him leave though? They may have told the family that they should leave; if they refuse there isn't much they can do.

WeeOrcadian · 10/05/2023 18:10

MargaretThursday · 10/05/2023 18:09

How do they make him leave though? They may have told the family that they should leave; if they refuse there isn't much they can do.

It's private property - they can be made to leave

Gingerlygreen · 10/05/2023 18:11

They should've made the family leave and regarding your review were you planning to leave a positive one if that hadn't happened?

So many people jump to leaving negative reviews if they're unhappy with something yet rarely think to post positive ones if they're not.

OhmygodDont · 10/05/2023 18:13

And this is why there are so many bugs. Soft play. Always brimming with ick.

DemonicCaveMaggot · 10/05/2023 18:13

That is ridiculous, and of course people can be asked to leave a business if they are projectile vomiting all over the place, changing nappies on a restaurant table, or setting their child down to poop on a potty in the middle of a cafe or any of the other disgusting things that some parents seem to think is acceptable once they have got used to their own child's vomit, pee, and poop. They may not want to leave, but the company either employs security to walk them out or phones the police to trespass them out if they won't leave of their own accord.

I'd complain to the local council health inspector or whatever the name for it is in the UK. Do they serve food there? Their hygiene rating needs to go down a few notches.

PriOn1 · 10/05/2023 18:14

That’s grim. I hope he’d just had too much cola or party food and that you and your daughter are fine. Sorry you went through that though. As a fellow emetophobe, that would be about my worst nightmare.

I think I might leave an honest review, but if you want to go in more gently, you could send a letter and ask if they would reconsider their policy.

seventyfour75 · 10/05/2023 18:15

This is gross, don't get me wrong but it's well known soft plays are filthy places anyway.

Jonnycakes · 10/05/2023 18:20

I saw similar a couple of weeks ago. A little girl was running around while her parents were eating. She threw up, mother stood and watched the staff clean it then just sat back down at the table and carried on eating!! I couldn’t believe it, if it was DS being sick, we’d have been straight in the car and on our way home!

Original poster
Razputini · 10/05/2023 18:23

Re the letter about changing policies, they've got a wall of rules near the entrance that says 'unwell children must leave' which I even pointed out to the staff member but she didn't seem bothered, and from describing her to a friend it seems shes the owner ☹️ they do also serve food there yes. If I do put up a review I would start by writing the positives for sure, it's a nice place but this has just really let down my opinion of it.

@PriOn1 it's awful isn't it 😭 I had to leave early and I felt so bad because my daughter was having so much fun and was begging not to leave but I was shaking in fear. It'll be keeping me up for a few nights unfortunately

OP posts:
Original poster
Razputini · 10/05/2023 18:24

@Jonnycakes I feel exactly the same, I keep thinking if it was my own children we'd be out of there, it's just irresponsible towards other children I think, it's a horrible thing that doesn't need passed around

OP posts:
ToastandJamandTea · 10/05/2023 18:24

I have a child who has a medical condition that can cause vomiting but is not the result of anything contagious.
I would be able to decide if the vomiting was part of their condition based on other symptoms. It often happens when they are anxious or overwhelmed and we always always end our activities as they can normally carry on when cleaned up.
Not everything is always as black and white as you think.

LlynTegid · 10/05/2023 18:26

In writing first.

The if they are unwilling to enforce policies and as they serve food, then to me it is a matter for Environmental Health.

Original poster
Razputini · 10/05/2023 18:30

@ToastandJamandTea I wondered this too but seeing as the staff member spoke to the parents and they didn't mention a condition like this to me when I was concerned afterwards I'm assuming it's a bug not the norm

OP posts:
Sceptre86 · 10/05/2023 18:31

My youngest has reflux so does do a projectile vomit now and again. It's much improved since she was born. She is 20 months though and I take 2 sets of spare clothes wherever I go. I would just change her clothes, clean her up and send her back in. If my 5 or 7 year old had been sick it would be more likely that they were coming down with something and I wouldn't have spare clothes for them, I'd likely take them home.

Leave a review if you want.

Neededanewuserhandle · 10/05/2023 18:36

I don't know why people get so wound up by online reviews. You can post a factual account of what happened and add that you were not happy with how staff dealt with it - there's no reason not to do this if you wish.

You would not be in any way unreasonable to post an honest account of your experience.

iatealltheminieggs · 10/05/2023 18:38

That's gross. I feel sorry for the staff at softplays though, its not a job I could do! They may not have felt confident enough to make the family leave. Its every man for himself at those places.

ToastandJamandTea · 10/05/2023 18:38

Razputini · 10/05/2023 18:30

@ToastandJamandTea I wondered this too but seeing as the staff member spoke to the parents and they didn't mention a condition like this to me when I was concerned afterwards I'm assuming it's a bug not the norm

I wouldn't have explained my child's medical condition to the staff member either. It's sensitive information and they get very anxious/upset with strangers knowing.
I think you would be best letting this go.

SleepingStandingUp · 10/05/2023 18:40

greenlychee · 10/05/2023 18:06

If they don't respond suitably to the written complaint, then maybe take it further with a review! I agree it is bad though, if they were at school they would be sent home for two days to avoid spreading it.

Not these days. If they seem wel after vomiting, it's a call home to check there's no history and they can otherwise stay.

Anonymous48 · 10/05/2023 18:45

MargaretThursday · 10/05/2023 18:09

How do they make him leave though? They may have told the family that they should leave; if they refuse there isn't much they can do.

Of course they could ask them to leave! It's private property. If they refused, the soft play people could choose to call law enforcement.

I agree that this is pretty disgusting. If I had a child with a medical condition that might make them vomit even when not ill, I would at the very least be bringing a change of clothes for them, not letting them back into the activity with vomit on their clothes.

Barleysugar86 · 10/05/2023 18:46

SleepingStandingUp · 10/05/2023 18:40

Not these days. If they seem wel after vomiting, it's a call home to check there's no history and they can otherwise stay.

Show quote history

Haha can definitely say this is not the case... primary sent home for the two days regardless this week.

WoolyMammoth55 · 10/05/2023 18:46

SleepingStandingUp · 10/05/2023 18:40

Not these days. If they seem wel after vomiting, it's a call home to check there's no history and they can otherwise stay.

Show quote history

Where are you getting this idea? It's certainly not the case at our primary! 48 hours from vomit to being allowed back, no quibbles. My DS has a 'sensitive stomach' (my DDad was the same) and pukes sometimes when tired/run down. It's easy to distinguish from tummy bugs because no fever and just one big puke, then he sleeps, then he's back to normal. School will never relax their rules for this though, even with a note from the GP... They err on the side of caution.

OP, I'd leave a bad review in your shoes - you raised it on the day and gave them a chance to make it right. Now just share the facts with other parents so that they can make an informed decision.

JMSA · 10/05/2023 18:47

my daughter was having so much fun and was begging not to leave but I was shaking in fear. It'll be keeping me up for a few nights unfortunately

How do you get through life?!