Multiple Savings account for baby opened by others

[CookieBaker88]

AIBU about family members telling me they’re opening multiple savings accounts in my baby’s name?

Just sounding out a bit here to figure out if I’m being unreasonable or not. Would be good to get some neutral opinions.

My baby was born last year, and since then individual family members (on my side) have said that instead of buying Christmas presents etc, they’ve opened a savings account for the baby. We haven’t been given any documentation and we intended to open up an account for baby soon ourselves, being the parents. I should add we are more comfortably off than most of my family.

My gut instinct is to feel quite put out by this for some reason, I thought if they wanted to do such things they would do it with us or let US Open one for baby which they contribute to. It seems messy for baby to have all these accounts everywhere.

My mother is one of the people and is a bit of a nightmare/control freak to be honest and I can’t tell if I’m letting issues I’ve had with her previously taint my reaction to this. She oversteps boundaries, wants to be involved (aka in charge) of everything regarding “her precious grandchild”. The nightmare mother in law is in fact my mother in this scenario… I want to not see everything she does as a dick move tbh. The other people are not like this.

How on Earth are all these people opening multiple accounts without proof of parentage..?

YABU. Nothing messy about it, if someone wants to save for your child it's a lovely thing to do. It's irrelevant how well off you think you are in comparison.

If they've set up an account in the baby's name then they will have needed the birth certificate.

I thought you need a birth certificate/proof of identity to open a bank account? So noone can open an account for dc without obtaining that from you.
Happy to be told I'm wrong but 3 years ago Halifax and Virgin Money requested it when my parents and parents in law opened ds bank accounts.

This is not possible without birth certificate. I wanted to do the same with my sister’s agreement for my niece and it was not straightforward so decided to contribute to the one she opened instead.
they clearly have not done it.

Let them save that’s fine, but just don’t give them baby’s documents and set one up yourself. Give them the account number if they want to add to it.

well they’re not are they? If they had the birth cert to open these accounts that’s your own fault for providing it. If they didn’t have the birth cert then they haven’t opened any accounts in the baby’s name so there’s no problem.

YABU

My in-laws did this. We checked them that it wasn't an ISA and once they confirmed it wasn't, we let them knock themselves out.

No idea how much is in the accounts or when the kids will get access but my MIL is also a total control freak, it doesn't impact us on a day to day basis, and the kids will no doubt appreciate it when the money does come their way one day, so it seemed better just to let them get on with it.

I do find it really odd though that we as their parents have no idea what is being done on their behalf.

They have not opened savings accounts in your baby's name.

They have possibly opened savings accounts in their own name, and told you they are 'for the baby', but they nevertheless own those accounts. That's the law if you are in the UK, I believe.

You just need a birth certificate.

Although when we opened one for granddaughter we never see we had to get a parent to sign a paper.

(There was no issue in our case with not having birth certificates- we never gave them to the in laws, but they still managed to set up accounts. I think they might be a type of trust fund, but I don't really know!!)

It's easy to get copy birth certificates isn't it? I've never done it for someone's baby but I have done it for older relatives when researching family tree. It isn't very expensive.

Anyone can get someone's birth certificate if they know where they were born.

And that's why banks want sight of the child now.

How did they open them OP?

The cynic in me would say that your baby will never see that money.
it’s highly unlikely the accounts are in the babies name.

just say actually we’ve set up an account with x bank in babys name, here are the details … feel free to contribute in that one rather than buy baby gifts if you’d prefer.

if they don’t then, just ignore any promise of money in the future and if it comes through then bonus.

All they’re saying is that they’ve opened a new account, in their own names, into which they will put money on birthdays and holidays in lieu of gifts for your baby. At some point, that money will be your baby’s.

How can you possibly object to this? What is wrong with this? And what does it have to do with you? Your baby has lots of relatives. You’re not the only person in your baby’s life, hopefully there are grandparents, aunts and uncles etc. Isn’t this something to be happy about? So much love and generosity from so many people?

Also, your baby IS your mum’s precious grandchild. Of course she is! And how lovely is that??! Wish I had had even a single grandparent, all four of mine passed before I was even born.

I don't think this would bother me tbh. If they want to save for the baby then I don't see it being a problem. The account doesn't need to be in the baby's name for them to put the money aside.

Well if you are really upset about other people saving money for your child, I am more than happy to provide a copy of my birth certificate and they can open an account for me. 😁

I think you can buy bonds for a baby although I do think the parent still needs to verify it.
FIL put money into bonds for DD on her first Christmas, I think my husband had to send something off thought within a certain amount of time otherwise the first amount would have bounced.
FIL tops it up on birthdays without anything to do with us.

If someone is saving money for my child I’m perfectly happy for it to be separate. Why wouldn’t you? If they’ve saved it then I think it’s fair they get credit.

You do realise that if they opened the account, they can also close it and take the money out right? The child will never see a penny.

@gamerchick which bank is it that just needs a birth cert? The one I work for needs to see the child. A quick google shows that most other banks do as well.

Children's accounts have very good interest rates so if no verification was required there's nothing to stop people from fraudulently opening them and making £££.

Unless you e given them some documentation how can they open accounts in your child’s name?

I don’t find this odd at all. Both my dm and dpil opened an account each for my dc. I thought it was a kind thing to do. They did ask for birth certificates which I happily provided and my dc have quite a substantial sum now for when they are grown up. My dm passed away and this money is a lovely gesture for my dc that they can treasure even in her absence.

It won’t be in your baby’s name if they don’t have access to the birth certificate. So presumably they’ve just opened a separate account to save for the baby, and will give them the money at some point. I would just say ‘oh that’s nice, thanks’ and not think too much about it.

A family member did this for our DC. They told us they had done so, but would never tell us how they'd done it - in her name or theirs. Then anytime anyone on their side of the family used to send money in a card, this person used to intercept the cards, and tell us that they'd put the money in that account. We never got to see a penny. Some years later, we've ended up NC with that family member, and the DC are approaching an age where they'll be taking full control of their own finances. But I suspect they'll never see that money that relative took.

This relative knew we already had accounts set up for the DC. I did rather resent separate accounts being set up - it felt like they were saying they didn't trust us not to touch DCs money. They could very easily have paid into their account - which cannot be touched by anyone before they reach 18. So I am not in favour of family setting up accounts when accounts already exist.