AIBU to not like the term 'on the spectrum' to mean autistic/has autism

[UndertheCedartree]

It really bugs me! Lots of conditions have spectrums so you could be talking about anything. It's so imprecise.

Also, I think it perpetuates the myth that there is one spectrum and everyone is on it somewhere so everyone is autistic to a greater or lesser extent.

I am not sure I understand it fully.

But I thought "the spectrum" refers to the range of behaviours displayed.

Whereas most of the public seem to use it in the context as a level of severity of symptoms.

So as far as I can tell it is used completely in the wrong sense by most people, and therefore at some point will fall out of usage or be replaced.

I don't like the phrase when applied to myself but I also don't like 'has autism' - I'm autistic.

I don't particularly care what others choose to say about themselves though.

I dont like it either as, like PP, i understood it to mean the there is a range of behaviours displayed.

But people seem to use it to mean a severity scale with neurotypical at one end and profoundly autistic at the other (for want of better words)

Just shows we are all different - I LOATHE the term 'is autistic' as you wouldn't say 'she is cancerous' - you would say she HAS cancer. I don't see why autism is any different, but there we go. Horses for courses

It refers to different areas that people struggle with more or less, but not as you say a simplistic severity of the condition. And I often hear people say 'we're all on it somewhere' as if it's a universal spectrum everyone is on rather than a spectrum that only autistic people are on.

Cancer is not comparable to a neurological condition though. You can have cancer just as you can't. If you are autistic you are always autistic.

Same, but I don't mind how others describe themselves/their child.

But this just seems particularly illogical to me.

I wouldn't take offence when people describe someone as a bit "spectrum". It's generally accepted that people mean along the autistic spectrum. The term doesn't bother me.

It used to bother me. My sons autistic and he has seemingly become so much less severe over the years that I can understand somewhat better the range of aspects/degree of severity.

But “on the spectrum” IME seems to be used in a mocking or self deprecating way and I hate it in that context. It’s ignorant.

Similarly, I also hate the disability label. Not every autistic child is disabled by it. My son was definitely disabled by it when he was younger, I didn’t think he’d be able to go to mainstream. He’s in seniors, very bright and outgoing - his only aspect is anxiety and poor sleeping. He would be absolutely crushed if he thought he was apparently ever disabled. I suppose proof that is really is a spectral disorder, nothing fluid, we
al just roll with the changes. My current worry is what puberty will bring (if it ever turns up ).

Living with autism is completely exhausting.

Thank you for explaining.

I also realise I used the word "symptom" which feels inappropriate in this context. Behaviour or characteristic seems better.

Out of interest do you have autism?

The difference for me is cancer is an illness, ASD is not. You can be cured from Cancer but not of Autism, you will always be autistic it is who you are.

But I respect those who prefer to say have autism.

But everyone isn't on the autistic spectrum, only autistic people are. Unless I've misunderstood what you meant?

The “spectrum” is really like a colour wheel and no, it doesn’t show “areas of struggle” but neuro-divergence from the neuro-typical norm in different aspects which like anything can be a strength in some situations, but a weakness in other situations.

I agree that people saying “oh we are all on the spectrum” is dismissive and similar to people saying “oh everyone gets depressed” or “we are all a bit OCD” or even “everyone has a bestselling book or top 40 song in them” or “anyone could be an Olympic athlete if they….”

It’s the kind of statement that minimises and dismisses everything good or bad about a person.

Autism isn't a disease that you may or may not have.

@UndertheCedartree no, I didn't mean we're all a bit like that as many people tend to imply to anyone showing a mere hint of an idiosyncrasy. I agree it minimises the condition for the genuinely autistic. I don't think people mean any harm by it but I can see why people dislike it.

My son has definitely struggled in different ways over his childhood.

I think disability is something that you define for yourself. So if your son doesn't feel disabled that should be fine. My son has struggled with needing access arrangements for his exams. How old is your son?

And yes, it is exhausting!

Yes, that's it.

I always say that I'm autistic - and there's logic to it. When somebody has cancer, you can think of them as the person they were (ie healthy) plus another thing (cancer).

Autism is entirely different - it's impossible to separate the person from the autism, because it's been a fundamental part of their personality, perception and behaviour since birth. It's not something that can be medically treated (in any meaningful way) or removed, or separated from their "normal" characteristics in any way. It's always been a part of them, and it always will be.

It's a part of me, therefore I am autistic. I'm built differently, and I'm cool with that (although knowing about it sooner would've been nice). I get that some folk don't like it, though, so I'm not exactly militant about it; each to their own, this is just my choice because it makes the most sense.

As for the OP..."on the spectrum" has always seemed to me to imply a fundamental misunderstanding of what "spectrum" actually means; it often goes hand-in-hand with somebody who says "we're all on the spectrum somewhere", as though it's a linear scale with "not autistic" at one end and "Rain Man" at the other. The reality is that it's more like a 2D colour palette as you'd see in Photoshop or similar, with each colour representing a neurodivergent trait.

Accordingly, while "on" implies a line, "in" implies presence within a bounded shape. If somebody said their friend was "in the spectrum", I'd be a lot happier.

But then...I'd be much happier if people stopped treating it like a dirty word to be avoided, and just bloody-well say "has autism" or "is autistic".

I agree with you OP. People who say “on the spectrum” are tiptoeing around the word autism or autistic which perpetuates the idea that autism is a dirty word.

I don’t say my children are “on the spectrum”, or “have ASD”, they are autistic.

Hmmm...yes, I suppose so but not sure I've ever experienced it like that, tbh. Can you give some examples? I mean yes there are usually benefits but struggles too.

Yes, it does feel dismissive.

I’ve worked with autistic people & now coming to terms with the fact that my 5 year old DD is autistic. I’ve learnt so much recently about autism & I have to say I’m inclined to agree about the use of ‘on the spectrum.’ I also cringe when I think of the term ASD (autism spectrum disorder). Most clients I worked with preferred the term autistic or Aspergers (though I know that is no longer used).

No, people don't usually mean any harm. It just annoys me!

Yes, I think some people do use 'on the spectrum' as an euphemism so suggesting 'autism' is too dreadful to say which doesn't feel nice.

Weirdly, "Aspie" has become an accepted-ish term, whereas "Asperger's" is a definite no-no. I guess "Aspie" has more of a friendly feel to it.

Still wouldn't use it myself, and I wouldn't be presumptuous enough to correct someone who applied it to themselves. I'd probably point it out if they were talking about someone else, though.

Well it is very different. You can get rid of cancer, you can't get rid of autism.

Most autistic people, such as myself, prefer to be called autistic or is autistic.