15 free hours (punished for not having a partner?)

[glossypeach]

Title is a bit weird but let me continue. I’m disabled and unable to work at the moment, I’m also a single parent to a three year old. He is eligible for the 15 hours free childcare because I’m currently not working. But if my circumstances changed and I got a partner who worked, I would be eligible for him to have the 30 hours free childcare. But the only thing that would change would be having a partner. I’d still be disabled, id still be unable to work but because I’d have a partner my child would be allowed to have that extra time in nursery. It feels like I’m being punished for choosing to remain single, and a bit discriminating that I’m unable to work at the moment but because I cannot do that, my child is missing out. My child is very active and although I have a good support network to help him get out when my disability disabled me to, he thrives at nursery - so I cannot see how single disabled people don’t get that 30 free hour funding also??

Exactly which parts of being in, and thankfully escaping from, an abusive relationship are you suggesting the Op should “point fingers at herself for”?

Vile.

But this isn’t the only thing that needs ‘fixing’ is it?

So say we somehow free up £50 million of taxpayers money. Do we spend it increasing OP (and others in that situation) nursery hours to 30, or do we spend it on training and paying more social care workers and providing respite to people with disabled children?

Which would you choose?

So no, it’s not a ‘simple fix’ by the government.

Yes, I see your point.

Exactly the 30 hours is to facilitate working not staying at home.

Why can't we have both? Why must it be either or?

Because to repeat a well worn phrase there is no magic money tree? What do some mumsnet posters not understand about that? I have no idea how grown adults cannot compute that things cost money, and money is finite.

Given the dire financial situation this country is in at the moment and the lack of taxes to pay for benefits and services I’m guessing it because there isn’t enough money.

Another option could be for a discussion, and even understanding that it’s not an easy fix, that doesn’t involve people jumping on the Op and claiming if she was given that she’d just be chasing something else next and basically calling her a scrounger (and in one case in this thread suggesting she should be pointing fingers at herself for being in an abusive relationship…).

Just because it’s not the only thing that needs fixing doesn’t make it illogical or outrageous that the OP feels like her DC is missing out on something another child with a similarly disabled parent benefits from.

I mean, there is an illogical element to the fact that the OP could meet someone next weekend, move them in with her, and even if they had basically zero to do with caring for her child because they worked her child would get double hours.

People fall through little gaps between different policies. In this case it’s the OPs child and, given she wants the best for her Dc (as the benefit to the child is the clear point of her post) it’s understandable she is frustrated about that specific thing.

Because it doesn’t fit with the current governments feelings toward the disabled.

Even if there was a magic money tree it wouldn’t be done atm.

The current governments policies toward the sick and disabled have pretty much all been cuts based.

Actually I think it is ‘outrageous’. Well, not outrageous, that’s a little strong, but her assumption she should be ‘entitled’ is, well, entitled.

It isn’t ‘illogical’, because the 30 free hours scheme is not based on disability or the make up of a family. It’s based on whether the parents work or not. It’s like posters on here can’t cope with a concession being based on working for once, rather than disability or not working. They assume it should apply to them even though they don’t meet the criteria, because they’re so used to meeting the criteria on everything else.

And what about the best for my child? I don’t think they’re getting ‘the best’ by only seeing me for 3 hours a day; when we’re rushing to get out the door or I’m exhausted after a day at work. That’s not best for my child. However my child doesn’t seem to count on here because I work - I’ll just be accused of ‘whinging’ by saying that; and should be ‘grateful I have a job’.

So it’s not really about children, it all circles back to entitlement, and this sour undercurrent on here that if you work you exist to prop up people that don’t, and what’s more, if you query it or complain you’re highly unreasonable.

Frankly if there was £50 million sloshing about, I would like it to be spent on foster cares and improved social services, given the number of children sadly abused (and worse) in the news recently.

And everyone else. They hate everyone equally it seems. Well, everyone who isn’t rich.

If there are any disabled MN on here and they are not already aware
There are Govn approved websites giving advice on additional support for, at the moment, 2023/2024.
Im guessing there are caveats and exclusions ( I don’t know), but there is a lot of support out there that is not currently being claimed.

But the OP also would not qualify for some of the benefits she is in receipt of as a disabled single parent.

So she is not at a 'disadvantage' in comparison to disabled persons in a relationship, she would be able to access more free childcare but lose money in her benefits.

She wouldn't be receiving all the assistance she gets now AND having more free childcare.

Swings and roundabouts.

You can get up to 85% childcare costs back if you’re claiming UC. I don’t know if this applies to OP or not though.

There’s loads of stuff around this which doesn’t always seem fair.

when I was a midwifery student “working” 40 hours a week unpaid at the hospital I wasn’t entitled to any free childcare because I wasn’t “working”. It’s not like I was sat at home all day! Dh was working.

In a way I was worse off than a working person. Not only did I have no wage I had to pay for full time childcare. Not sure if it’s still the same for nursing students, etc….sounds like they might get 15 hours now.

Not just because you’re single though as Royalbloo was replying to. The OP isn’t entitled to claim childcare costs if she doesn’t work, so wouldn’t get help toward it if she put her DC in more hours as suggested.

But she wouldn't... Both need to be working to qualify.

They don’t.

If the OP qualifies for certain disability benefits, which she does, she would be classed as disabled for childcare purposes and her partner would essentially be treated as a single parent in terms of hours and claiming childcare costs.

The links are earlier in the thread

When I was a student midwife I received childcare help through SFE childcare grant. Your partner must have earned too much to qualify.
I also got some help from charities and other funding to help with childcare costs.