I’m never ever ever buying a house. How do people even do it?!

[misstartan]

I’m 26 and I just feel like giving up. I currently flat share with a friend but want to move in with DP soon.

I have £2500 saved up and that’s it. DP has about the same so we’re nowhere near a deposit. We’re both earning a decent amount but we’re not putting enough away. I’ve tried budgeting etc and put about £300 a month away if I’m lucky.

But realistically deposits will be around 30k now, so I’m only about 28 away… 😂😭

Thing is, I’ve always had it in my head that I’d have bought a house and got married before I have kids. And I’ve always wanted to start having kids by 30. Only gives me 4 years..
I genuinely genuinely do not see how this is going to happen and it really upsets me 🙁

How do people do it?! The

https://www.hopkinshomes.co.uk/properties/suffolk/halesworth/the-linstead-plot-114/

£230k, new semi in Essex

Obviously might not be suitable op

Err, that was sort of my point? If OP could move home it would help, I didn't make assumptions that it was possible. But yes tbh I think I would be, so not sure why you 'think not'. I'd have had to buy somewhere smaller/less nice, or save up for a bit longer, but I believe I'd have met my goals. Currently sitting in a 4 bed detached at 32, so... Ladder. Also I did say I'd been saving since 18 and making choices to minimise spending/maximise income. You can't just turn round at 26 and be like 'hey how come I don't have any savings?' when you've put no effort into having any! That is possibly something OP is missing when comparing herself to peers.

@Lockheart *Back in the day a young couple could buy a small "starter" flat no problem.

Now the age at which people buy property is significantly increased thanks to the huge rise in house prices. So they need a starter home which can accommodate a young family. A tiny grotty flat isn't going to cut it*

OP is 26, not 36, so a starter flat is absolutely fine.

ExH and I finally bought at 39 in 2014. We had a 7% deposit and found a house for £183,000 which wasn't too bad. The deposit was partly savings and partly because we had a PPI payment after paying over the odds for years on one of his many loans.

It's my house now. I bought him out

Move somewhere cheaper, start with a flat and work your way up.

Mostly though, I’ve seen people get a massive dollop of money from parents, and/or they sacrifice other things like wedding/car/hols etc.

Also have you thought about lifetime ISAs for you and partner - would increase your savings 25%

@mackthepony Halesworth is in Suffolk,
North Suffolk so a very long way from
Essex.

How I did it:

My parents (owned their property, no mortgage) took out a £50k mortgage and loaned it to me for a deposit.

I got a mortgage in my own name for the remainder of purchase price.

I paid both monthly mortgage payments- mine and my parents. Was still cheaper than what rent would have been.

Lived in that house for 5 years before selling. When sold, paid off the £50k mortgage in my parents' name. Used the equity increase to fund deposit for my second property.

Obviously, I could not have done this without my parents' help... but it didn't cost them a penny. They just had to be willing (and trust me) to take out a mortgage on their property.

I have £30k saved up (hopefully £34k by the end of the year). I moved back in with my parents and have nothing in the way of a social life 🥲 but I save up the max £4k then put it in a LISA so get the full £1k on top. No sign of being able to move out any time soon though ☹️

My parents had helped me by putting money away for me to grow as I grew up. I know no help to you now, but that is my answer to your question! I did manage to save once I started work, again, thanks to my parents for letting me live at home with them until I was 24. I had the majority of the deposit, with a smaller amount of it from (now)DH. This was 8 years ago when we were 23 and 24.

@wildfirewonder never said it was fun. But if you want something you have to work to get it. Unless you win the lotto or get an inheritance how on earth do you think others manage to get on the property ladder? The system cant be changed by one person. However, you control your life and you can make changes to make sure you achieve your goals. Would you rather the OP just sat and did nothing?

I know fuck all about Essex (I'm in the south west) so this might be a hotbed of crime, but https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/134138414#/?channel=RES_BUY
Renovation might be a way round your problem? (I got on the property ladder by being willing to do a lot of work on houses).
Get creative.

I got a high earning career, paid off my student loans and then saved. Poor parents so did it all myself but onky managed to buy (in London) aged 37, by which time my eggs were no good and I can’t carry a pregnancy to term (14 babies down). So I have a house but no kids!

I wish I had got pregnant sooner instead of waiting for the house!

Well yeah, my DD and her husband are very fortunate, and are the exception rather than the rule. A cheap rent AND their very good wages meant they could save a lot very quickly. Not AS much surplus income now they have their own house! But still are quite well off with a decent amount of surplus income. (Hopefully things stay this way.) They have worked hard to be on the salaries they are on, but yeah, still good fortune has played a part.

They are overpaying the mortgage a bit at the moment. While they can!

Nope. You don't buy your ideal home. You buy something to get on the property ladder. If that has to be a one bed in a shitty area then that's what you do. That's what everyone has done for generations.

And I didn't go out, I didn't go on holiday, i walked instead of getting public transport. That's how I saved my deposit. And if your boyfriend put cash into the house he bought with his ex wife or paid half of the mortgage, he should get something out, even if not much

Hi this is how we did it. Saved 10k. Borrowed 10k from family, got a Builder's gift (5k) that was 5%.

Collectively we earn £130k a year before tax. We are mid 30s. Look into Builders gifts they can he as much as £12k and look into shared ownership.

I'm so sorry....... You sound like a woman I know tbh. 33 y.o. Saved £30K after living with her 2 sisters for several years, then put it on a little 2 bed semi that she bought in Autumn 2021. Was £150K.

She was given a £120K mortgage, which (on paper) was affordable and doable, and cheaper than most private rents. But she has had one thing after another go wrong with the house, and on top of her mortgage payments which keep going up and up, she now has £20K in loans (on top!) for house repairs and maintenance she has HAD to do in the 18 months since she bought the house!

She has NO surplus income now, is dreading her car failing the MOT, and has had to put a house repair she had last week on a credit card, as her funds are exhausted. She says repeatedly that she wishes she has stayed with her 2 sisters.

You definitely have to be more frugal if you want to get a place.
do you have any family locally that you could live with when your lease ends?
Also have a look on money saving expert, you can switch bank accounts and get £200 cashback but just make sure you make sure you can meet the requirements for the free money!

DH and I moved in to a shitty house share for 12 months. Meant rent and household bills of less than £500 each, meaning we could each save about £1k a month. Prior to that we'd only been able to save about £200 a month due to high rent. In the 3/4 months where we were actively looking for a house, we spent barely anything, never went out and turned down invites for birthdays etc - it was miserable but worth it.

I’m not saying renting is easy, but I had my child while renting - two different places and bought my first house just recently at 40. Don’t worry what ‘should’ have been.

@misstartan
OP, haven't read the full thread, so may have already been mentioned, would you consider shared ownership of a home?

Just seen you're spending £150 on your car. Is that a PCP? Can you get out of it? I had a crappy old banger that cost me a couple of hundred quid when I was your age.

You need to prioritise if you want to get on the housing ladder not means you can't have nice things. No 22 plate cars, no coffees on the way to work, no lunches from itsu, no gym membership, no holidays.

Share a room with your boyfriend. Save, save, save.

Of course! Good for them to be honest!

I bought at 45 5 years ago. Couldn't have bought earlier. It was impossible.

Keep saving, however much you can. It will add up. It will take time but you can do it.

Yes if you buy a house and the house needs repairs, you can easily get into serious debt of thousands of pounds.

It's a strange one.

Sometimes I do feel grateful that I "own* a house.

Other times I feel tremendous worry about the huge amount of money that I have to pay on house repairs.

There is definitely some good with owning a house of course. And I'm grateful to have a roof over my head. But there is definitely a lot of work and worry too. It's an experience

But overall I am grateful to have a house.