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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not go to the office tomorrow?

41 replies

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:14

I'll preface this by saying that I'm in my notice period and leaving in 2 weeks, which is definitely clouding my judgement in this situation.

I've been on A/L this week and I'm back at work tomorrow. I tend to work from home, and go in as little as possible (usually only when there are in-person meetings).

I was relaxing and then suddenly had this thought that I think I have a meeting in the office tomorrow. I just opened my work laptop and I was right. I had completely forgotten about it until just now. There's no Teams link for it, so I don't think it's a hybrid meeting. It's a brain storm kind of meeting. I don't want to go in because I don't feel prepared (it means getting up at 5:30am tomorrow to commute in), and I'm still recovering from a cold.

WIBU to work from home given it's my first day back and I had forgotten about this meeting until now? Or would I have been expected to have remembered/checked my calendar this evening?

OP posts:

Oysterbabe · 26/04/2023 22:16

If you weren't leaving I'd say you need to go in. You're leaving in 2 weeks, what are they going to do, sack you? Fuck it. Stay home.

Sissynova · 26/04/2023 22:16

Or would I have been expected to have remembered/checked my calendar this evening?

But you did remember to check this evening and you do know you have a meeting.
It’s pretty immature to just claim you didn’t know and not attend. It wastes other people’s time too.

Workyticket · 26/04/2023 22:16

Forgetting isn't an excuse - I'd say you need to go in

patrickbatemansbusinesscard · 26/04/2023 22:17

Ehhh... go into your work? Why even ask

lissie123 · 26/04/2023 22:18

I wouldn’t bother…

Original poster

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:18

I know rereading the post that IABU, I just really don't want to go into the office. I feel awkward as I'm leaving; my manager hasn't spoken to me since I handed in my notice 6 weeks ago...

OP posts:

Oopsiedaisyy · 26/04/2023 22:19

No point you brain storming as you're leaving 🤷‍♀️

salto · 26/04/2023 22:20

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:18

I know rereading the post that IABU, I just really don't want to go into the office. I feel awkward as I'm leaving; my manager hasn't spoken to me since I handed in my notice 6 weeks ago...

Sounds like it will be more awkward to go, in this case

Before you’d added this point I would’ve said to go. There’s no excuse not to since you remembered, but ultimately, I don’t see how there will be any consequences for you if you’re leaving anyway

bumpytrumpy · 26/04/2023 22:20

I wouldn't bother getting up for a brain storming meeting in a job you're leaving in 2 weeks!

Ask them to set you up on a laptop to listen on, or just don't say anything and miss it.

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 26/04/2023 22:22

I suppose it depends on whether you might need to ask for a reference from them in the future. I'd go in, if it's expected.

StepAwayFromTheBiscuitJar · 26/04/2023 22:22

As long as you've already got your references etc I'd probs say fuck it.

Original poster

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:22

I'm also autistic which is probably why this is more of a big deal than others. I find going into the office quite stressful, and have lots of little routines that help me feel in control about it (such as going to bed really early, laying out all of my clothes and packing my bag, eating a 'safe' meal and clearing my calendar so that I can start at 10am to miss rush hour - which is a reasonable adjustment I have in place). But the meeting is at 9am so I can't do that, and I've only remembered at 10pm and nothing is ready.

OP posts:

TeenLifeMum · 26/04/2023 22:22

Just email the meeting organisers in the morning and say

Hi, looking in my diary we have x meeting this afternoon. Please can you attach a teams link so I can join as I’m wfh today. Many thanks @nahhhththt

TeenLifeMum · 26/04/2023 22:23

Change afternoon to morning.

pointlesssocket · 26/04/2023 22:24

If you want a good reference, go into work.

Original poster

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:25

We aren't allowed to request references from our managers, references are just short, factual references given by HR

OP posts:

mackthepony · 26/04/2023 22:25

Nah, stay home

hagueliue · 26/04/2023 22:26

pointlesssocket · 26/04/2023 22:24

If you want a good reference, go into work.

Surely references have already been checked

thecrispfiend · 26/04/2023 22:26

Tell them you have a heavy cold and don't want to pass it to colleagues so will work at home x we are now actively encouraged to stay home if under the weather to avoid passing germs x

Summer2424 · 26/04/2023 22:30

Hi @nahhhththt
Surely the perk of any notice period is to start winding down not taking on more work and attending meetings!
Enjoy your wfh day x

Original poster

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:31

hagueliue · 26/04/2023 22:26

Surely references have already been checked

Show quote history

I handed in my notice with nothing lined up as I was so unhappy there, so I do still need a reference. Thankfully I spent my annual leave this week interviewing for jobs and received a job offer earlier today

OP posts:

FoxFeatures · 26/04/2023 22:35

They are still paying your salary to do your job. So you do your job.

KittyAlfred · 26/04/2023 22:39

Will other people have to do extra work to make up for your absence?

Istolethecookies · 26/04/2023 22:42

I wouldn’t go in. I’d just say it completely slipped your mind. You’re leaving anyway, they probably won’t bat an eyelid about it if you don’t turn up.

hagueliue · 26/04/2023 22:45

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:31

Show quote history

Wow, well done. What kind of job is it if you don’t mind? I need a new job with that sort of quick turnaround!

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