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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not go to the office tomorrow?

41 replies

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:14

I'll preface this by saying that I'm in my notice period and leaving in 2 weeks, which is definitely clouding my judgement in this situation.

I've been on A/L this week and I'm back at work tomorrow. I tend to work from home, and go in as little as possible (usually only when there are in-person meetings).

I was relaxing and then suddenly had this thought that I think I have a meeting in the office tomorrow. I just opened my work laptop and I was right. I had completely forgotten about it until just now. There's no Teams link for it, so I don't think it's a hybrid meeting. It's a brain storm kind of meeting. I don't want to go in because I don't feel prepared (it means getting up at 5:30am tomorrow to commute in), and I'm still recovering from a cold.

WIBU to work from home given it's my first day back and I had forgotten about this meeting until now? Or would I have been expected to have remembered/checked my calendar this evening?

OP posts:

Greenfairydust · 26/04/2023 22:49

You handed out your notice so it is completely normal that with 2 weeks to go you care very little about the role.

Call in sick and enjoy your day
Tell them you tested positive for Covid and can't travel so you will do the meeting remotely (or won't participate if that is not feasible).

It sounds like you had a bad experience with the company so there is no reason to waste your time and energy and be nice about it...

@pointlesssocket
''If you want a good reference, go into work.''

Grow up!

Some pretty pathetic, slave-mentality responses on this thread...

Calling sick for a day or not attending a meeting in person is not going to affect your reference and you owe a crap employer nothing as far as I am concerned.

Original poster

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:49

FoxFeatures · 26/04/2023 22:35

They are still paying your salary to do your job. So you do your job.

I will be doing my job, just from home and asking to dial in from home instead of being in the office.

My company is pretty flexible with WFH, and I don't think I've ever attended a face-to-face meeting where everyone has been in attendance. People have dialled in before, I've always attended if a meeting is said to be in-person.

OP posts:

pointlesssocket · 26/04/2023 22:51

@Greenfairydust No need to be unkind and tell me to 'grow up', it's just my view on it all.

BartsLongLostBro · 26/04/2023 22:52

I would go in obviously but you do you.

ggbbnn1 · 26/04/2023 23:00

Hmm I'd maybe be worried about the need for a reference but tbh sounds like you're over it and will be ok with the short one from HR. I wouldn't bother going in. I made a minuscule mistake in my work a few weeks ago and felt sick having to go in, it's not worth it.

Greenfairydust · 26/04/2023 23:00

''@pointlesssocket · Today 22:51
@Greenfairydust No need to be unkind and tell me to 'grow up', it's just my view on it all.''

It is a nonsensical comment to suggest that a reference will be based on whether someone misses one day of work or not.

UneFoisAuChalet · 26/04/2023 23:01

TeenLifeMum · 26/04/2023 22:22

Just email the meeting organisers in the morning and say

Hi, looking in my diary we have x meeting this afternoon. Please can you attach a teams link so I can join as I’m wfh today. Many thanks @nahhhththt

This.

Act as if you going into the office for a meeting never even crossed your mind. You’re pre-empting them asking where you are. Act surprised if they say it’s F2F. Remember - in two weeks time you’ll never have to deal with them ever again. So who gives a shit.

Candleabra · 26/04/2023 23:03

Of course you need to go in. It’s a meeting with no dial in option. Your company are paying you to work. If you feel unwell enough to phone in sick then that’s another matter.

CC4712 · 26/04/2023 23:13

If you have a reasonable adjustment to not start onsite till 10am- then how can they expect you to be there for a 9am meeting?

I'd email first thing to ask if they can add a dial in for the meeting.

I agree- bit strange they want your opinions for brain storming. 1 company I was at wouldn't allow me to attend ANY meetings once I'd resigned!

Smallyellowbird · 26/04/2023 23:22

A request to diall in is appropriate I think.

MeinKraft · 26/04/2023 23:23

I wouldn't go in, and wouldn't allude to it at all. If your manager wants to be petty then why would you run around after daft meetings?

NoSquirrels · 26/04/2023 23:24

Log on tomorrow at 8.30, or whatever earlier time. Check email, send a message to the organiser saying ‘I’m just working through my inbox from annual leave. I see there’s a meeting in at 9am - could you please send me a link as I’m WFH today’

Then don’t worry about it if it’s not possible to dial in.

Hawkins003 · 26/04/2023 23:24

It's always better to build bridge's as you never know when you'll need them.

Changeforachange · 26/04/2023 23:35

As you're leaving in 2 weeks. Genuinely, your time is probably better spent focusing on tying up lose ends & cracking on while WFH than being unproductive in a meeting for future planning because you were stressed/overwhelmed by travelling in rush hour which you have a documented adjustment for.

Agree with PP.
Email boss, say you made a judgement call because of the above & ask for a link if it's necessary for you to participate the meeting. You're showing initiative by making best use of the time you have left. Or that's the line I'd spin anyway.

CantHaveTooMuchChocolate · 26/04/2023 23:49

nahhhththt · 26/04/2023 22:31

I handed in my notice with nothing lined up as I was so unhappy there, so I do still need a reference. Thankfully I spent my annual leave this week interviewing for jobs and received a job offer earlier today

Show quote history

Congrats on the offer! I agree with @thecrispfiend and say you don’t want to pass on your virus (no one wants to sit in a meeting with someone ill!). If your manager hasn’t bothered to speak to you in 6 weeks then I very much doubt that will change now either, so enjoy the day wfh.

BramblyHedgeMouse · 26/04/2023 23:58

Can‘t blame you for wanting to stay home.
Realistically how important is it for you to contribute? How many people are attending?
If they really need your input, I would say ask for a Teams link.

I would be tempted to decline the meeting, just say you’re busy catching up after annual leave, tying up loose ends before you leave etc…

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