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Original poster

To ask you to help make me feel better about myself and tell me of a time you made a tit of yourself

29 replies

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 21/04/2023 23:45

I noticed a £20 charge on my Apple Pay this morning called ‘Park Dragon’, at 10am. A ‘transport service’ according to my banking app.

Got onto online chat saying I’ve had fraud on my account, I was driving at this time, can they cancel card and refund my transaction, that I haven’t spend £20 on parking or transport anywhere!

They were very nice, they cancelled my card, raised a fraud query etc and will look into refunding it.

It’s just dawned on me now that the charge was for petrol. Totally forgot I stopped for fuel and was impressed that I managed to get to £20 on the nose. I feel like a right tit.

OP posts:
Annoyingwurringnoise · 21/04/2023 23:54

I’ve done that several times, don’t worry. Nothing more embarrassing than ringing up a company all indignant because a charge has landed on your account that you don’t recognize, only to realize half way through the call that, oh yeah, it was me, I just forgot/misread. I bet they get it all the time.

i’ll try and think of an occasion I made a tit of myself. It’s not that I’m struggling to think of one, it’s that I’m struggling to pick one out of the many millions of occasions there have been.

Beeinalily · 22/04/2023 00:00

There are a few, but remembering the faces of a mum and daughter when I sold them some Mane 'n' Tail shampoo while wittering on about how nice it was that horse shampoo was available in supermarkets has got to be up there...

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 22/04/2023 00:04

I was very enthusiastic at Zumba and managed to punch myself in the face.

I was the instructor.

BakedTattie · 22/04/2023 00:06

Don’t worry. I make a tit of myself everyday. I just laugh about it, it’s better than crying 🥴

Newuswr · 22/04/2023 00:08

One day I had a job interview where they were going over my statement in the interview. He asked me about “apples” and I started talking about “oranges”. (Both are different programming languages eg R vs Python). I didn’t get the job. He probably thought I lied on my application but the truth was I was flustered lol

fourlambbhunas · 22/04/2023 00:15

When I was in college I was a part time waitress. I thought a regular customer was leaning in to kiss me on the cheek... he was reaching past me for his coat and I planted a kiss right on his cheek... in front of his wife...

345s · 22/04/2023 00:22
  1. Trying to be sophisticated in the upstairs room of a wine bar. Fell backwards over the balcony and landed in a bush. I was fine.
345s · 22/04/2023 00:23

I was 16!

IHateLegDay · 22/04/2023 00:24

I make an absolute tit of myself daily.

Inca22 · 22/04/2023 00:25

@Beeinalily but it was used on show horses?!

Bayleaf25 · 22/04/2023 00:28

IHateLegDay · 22/04/2023 00:24

I make an absolute tit of myself daily.

Me too. I’m over 50 and am basically a ridiculous, overgrown, Bridget Jones who somehow can’t help but end up being a total idiot.

HighInfidelity · 22/04/2023 00:32

I fell flat on my face today after tripping over my own feet in a park. I also managed to bang my head really hard on the table when I leaned under it to pick a fork up. It’s a good job I have hair to cover the inevitable bruise I’ll have in the morning.

whoami24601 · 22/04/2023 00:32

Oh OP this has reminded me of the time my sister made me accompany her to the bank to enquire about unrecognised charges on her account. When the bank manager explained they were from Walkabout (tell me your age without telling me your age...) she looked like this Blush and made me leave sharpish. Turns out her and her mate had been on a massive bender that weekend and they'd been so drunk she'd forgotten how much she'd spent 🤦‍♀️ oops!

SarahDippity · 22/04/2023 00:32

I still cringe about this though it was 20 years ago. Went to a house party at ‘Peter and Jane’s.’ I knew Peter well from uni but had only met Jane once. When we arrived (bang on time) Jane answered the door in a fab tux jacket I recognised from Zara, and I swept in with a gift and kisses, as she took my coat. I admired her jacket, complimented her new hairstyle and asked about her work, insisting she sit beside me. After about five minutes, ‘Jane’ appeared out of another room in a fabulous dress, and I realised Jane #1 was the bar girl they’d booked.

As for other guests who could have rescued the situation, nobody else arrived for about 20 minutes, or possibly three hours, as that’s how long it felt. What made it worse was Peter and Jane were announcing their engagement.

We didn’t get invited to the wedding.

345s · 22/04/2023 00:40

I was stuck in the lift at work for three hours. I'd been out to buy lunch, so at least I had supplies, but had to drink my bottle of coke so that I could wee into the empty bottle. Thankfully I was alone in the lift but people knew.

PussBilledDuckyPlait · 22/04/2023 00:45

TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 21/04/2023 23:45

I noticed a £20 charge on my Apple Pay this morning called ‘Park Dragon’, at 10am. A ‘transport service’ according to my banking app.

Got onto online chat saying I’ve had fraud on my account, I was driving at this time, can they cancel card and refund my transaction, that I haven’t spend £20 on parking or transport anywhere!

They were very nice, they cancelled my card, raised a fraud query etc and will look into refunding it.

It’s just dawned on me now that the charge was for petrol. Totally forgot I stopped for fuel and was impressed that I managed to get to £20 on the nose. I feel like a right tit.

I spent a good 25 minutes fussing through receipts to identify a payment for £20.54 on my last bank statement - also turned out to be petrol. It was something like 'Green Valley Heights' which I had no idea was the name of that particular petrol station. We pass it often but only used it as a one off due to road works near our usual one.

JMSA · 22/04/2023 00:50

I once did a massive fart in front of a class of teenage boys. I didn't know it was coming obviously Blush
They were bent double over their desks from laughing.

Hoppingmad231 · 22/04/2023 00:54

When my ds had his 2 year check up and health visitor was talking about how he plays asked if he makes a cup of tea role play etc I said a cup off tea why would I even let him try haha obviously I was still sleep deprived then.

MicrowaveRice · 22/04/2023 01:08

Went for a fancy-dan interview in a posh London office ... walked into a glass wall while walking to the elevator afterwards ... mortified! But got the job.

user1473878824 · 22/04/2023 01:11

a tiny bit outing but not really because no one read it which is why I no longer work there: I used to work for the first iPad magazine and despite having no knowledge to help anyone do anything one of my jobs was reading and replying to any help desk-type emails. Got in one morning to an irate email from a man who was furious because the sound wasn’t working on any of the articles and he’d paid his subscription and was very cross - he’d deleted the issue, re-downloaded it, done everything. We had massively fucked up and he wasn’t happy with us AT ALL. A massively bollocking email.

While I was reading it an email came in from the same man saying “sooo… much like the time my screen wasn’t working and after much huffing and puffing and toing and froing an IT a man came in to fix it and pointed out I simply hadn’t turned my computer on, I realised that I’d switched the sound off on my iPad, I’m so sorry” but he made the story so funny and self deprecating that 13 years on I think about him often, fondly.

I make a tit of myself often but then laugh and even if I’m dying inside laughing definitely switches other people’s view on the situation too, same if you make a mistake. This obviously doesn’t work if your job is at a crematorium or an ICU.

FetchezLaVache · 22/04/2023 01:27

I was invited to the 40th birthday of an old school friend's partner. I was introduced to the birthday boy's mother, who was in a wheelchair. I said how do you do and put out my hand to shake hers... no response. Realised belatedly she no longer had the use of her arms. I have never wanted the earth to open up and swallow me so much! Friend dropped me after that.

saltandpepper86 · 22/04/2023 06:32

I once found a fiver on the floor of Mcdonalds whilst queuing, thought I was being a great person handing it in - it was only my bloody fiver! my pockets were empty and I couldn't pay! no Mcdonalds for me 😂I was about 14 at the time

Beeinalily · 22/04/2023 06:51

@Inca22 Was it? I'm even more confused now. It does have a picture of horses on the label.

Crimblecrumble1990 · 22/04/2023 07:02

Beeinalily · 22/04/2023 06:51

@Inca22 Was it? I'm even more confused now. It does have a picture of horses on the label.

Definitely for people, not horses :)

Inca22 · 22/04/2023 08:47

Yes it is for humans but it was for horses!

Originally, the product was created on the Katzev family horse farm in rural New Jersey. Straight Arrow was born when Mr. Katzev's parents created Original Mane 'n Tail Shampoo and Conditioner… that were specifically targeted for show horses with long flowing manes and tails.

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