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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed with these house sellers…

179 replies

NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 21/04/2023 16:49

So I know I probably am being unreasonable but actually just need a vent.

We put in an offer on a house earlier this week, we fell in love with it and offered £12k over asking. We met the sellers and got on like a house on fire. They took a lot of pride in the property and seem to want to take in to account who will be buying their house. I know there were another four offers but from what the EA would tell us we were the highest (all offers were asking price and above). The sellers haven’t found anywhere as they are moving to a different city so it’s just slower as they can’t just nip for viewings and our house is on the market but not sold (viewings are commencing next week) the EA told me when they had the viewing that they had more viewings booked in for this weekend but as they had, had so many this week plus offers they were looking to cancel and accept an offer before the weekend. I just felt in my gut the house was ours…

Just heard from the EA that they are planning on commencing with viewings this weekend. AIBU to be a bit miffed?

Can anyone who has sold before give me any possible insight to what they are thinking?! Surely you would want to be sold as quickly as possible and with solid offers on the table would pick one. Especially as you have a couple of offers over asking?!

OP posts:
NoName12345678 · 21/04/2023 20:30

Where I am you need proof of funds in order to make an offer. The EA then seeks offers from all the other bidders until someone comes out on top. It's the EA's job to get the maximum price for the seller...

BellaJuno · 21/04/2023 20:38

AnotherDelphinium · 21/04/2023 16:57

I wouldn’t even consider an offer from someone who hadn’t sold theirs yet, especially not with a plethora of others on the table!

Yep, me either. And if they’ve had a number of offers above asking and haven’t found somewhere themselves, why would they rush to accept yours? You’re bonkers if you think the fact yours is currently the highest offer puts you in the best position with them - you’re in a fairly weak position if you’ve still got to find someone to offer on yours.

Beetrootlover82 · 21/04/2023 20:57

* I just felt in my gut the house was ours… *

I think you extrapolated a lot from when you met them (“getting on like a house on fire”)

this is potentially a transactional relationship pure and simple. Nothing more.

Erex · 21/04/2023 21:06

I would have done the same as them. We had an offer on our house, estate agent advised the viewers booked in for the week ahead (including one second viewing) were still on the market whereas our offer was full asking price from a cash buyer. We took it and cancelled the future viewings.

If I was the seller in your situation OP, I would keep your offer on the table, and formally accept when you were under offer yourself, provided it was still the highest. If, say, a cash buyer or someone who was SSTC came along in the meantime and offered even a little less than you, I'd accept their offer as they could proceed immediately.

EveryWitchWaybutLoose · 21/04/2023 22:21

It’s a business matter so take the emotion out of it. You haven’t even had any viewings of your house, let alone offers. They’re being cautious, and I don’t blame them.

People get into knots when they fixate on the “perfect” house. There’s always another property.

Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 21/04/2023 22:27

JudyGemstone · 21/04/2023 19:27

if they’ve not found anything yet they might appreciate a more leisurely pace and go with yours ? <clutches at straws!)

They might be heart over head types and go with who they preferred rather than who’s in what position?

I really hope you get it! But if not don’t worry, there’ll be others. I feel for you, it is so stressful!

That’s the spirit! @JudyGemstone i mean this was entirely my thought process if I’m honest 😂 I honestly thought we would be MORE attractive because we were effectively in the same position as them and they’ve said they can’t find anywhere.

OP posts:
Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 21/04/2023 22:30

BellaJuno · 21/04/2023 20:38

Yep, me either. And if they’ve had a number of offers above asking and haven’t found somewhere themselves, why would they rush to accept yours? You’re bonkers if you think the fact yours is currently the highest offer puts you in the best position with them - you’re in a fairly weak position if you’ve still got to find someone to offer on yours.

Show quote history

Well tbf by the majority of most peoples logic, they wouldn’t be able to offer on something they love (if they found it) until they had sold there’s so surely that’s an incentive to get the process tied up ASAP?

OP posts:
Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 21/04/2023 22:32

lunaloveroo · 21/04/2023 19:34

Tbh you've shot yourself in the foot a bit. You've gone 12k over asking which the agent will tell the people viewing over the weekend so the price may well go up, and you weren't even proceedable anyway.

In all honesty I’m not really sure what else we could’ve done? We were told more than once it was best and final offers up front as they didn’t want a bidding war and because there were asking price plus over offers on the table they would be cancelling the viewings this weekend and deciding today. Had I known that the viewings were going ahead I would’ve waited and got ours in as late as possible!

OP posts:
sarahc336 · 21/04/2023 22:44

Really you should have been under offer yourself before you went looking. They'll be wanting an offer from someone already sold I'm afraid op

Erex · 21/04/2023 22:48

I'm actually beginning to wonder if it's a house we enquired about @NewKidOnTheBlock99 😅 If not, very similar sounding situation.
We asked to view a house but the estate agent said they didn't want any more viewings as they already had a few offers on the table, and were likely going to accept one in particular. A few days ago, estate agent called to say they were opening up viewings again and were we interested in booking one.
We already have a new house so didn't of course, but I guess it may be something to bear in mind in future, or to go too high top quickly, expecially if you're not in an optimal position at that time.

Also, I don't know if it's true that estate agents and sellers shouldn't tell you how much others have offered or if I imagined it, but I can honestly say that buying our most recent house, the estate agent told us the position of other interested parties and how much seller wanted to agree to the sale immediately, and our previous house the owner outright said someone else had offered asking as their top end, so anything at all over that would outdo them.

Erex · 21/04/2023 22:49

*not to go too high too quickly - that should have said!

Daisiesandprimroses · 21/04/2023 22:54

Oh god, they aren’t going to sell it to you as,you got on well,cmon. They are going for the max money. What’s hard to understand.

Grimbelina · 21/04/2023 22:56

I wouldn't accept your offer either because you hadn't sold your house. I would do exactly as the seller's are doing and accept the highest offer from someone who could actually proceed, even if your offer was higher.

Malloryhitops · 21/04/2023 23:06

It really is a sellers market. They have seen the unprecedented interest and will be able to hold out for more money, and an uncomplicated seller I.e someone not in a property chain. Not surprising as if I was in the same boat I would probably do the same. It’s a massive purchase/sale so you’re going to hold out for the best possible offer. Still it’s rubbish to be on the receiving end. Don’t lose faith it may still very well work out, I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you 🤞

Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 08:23

Erex · 21/04/2023 22:48

I'm actually beginning to wonder if it's a house we enquired about @NewKidOnTheBlock99 😅 If not, very similar sounding situation.
We asked to view a house but the estate agent said they didn't want any more viewings as they already had a few offers on the table, and were likely going to accept one in particular. A few days ago, estate agent called to say they were opening up viewings again and were we interested in booking one.
We already have a new house so didn't of course, but I guess it may be something to bear in mind in future, or to go too high top quickly, expecially if you're not in an optimal position at that time.

Also, I don't know if it's true that estate agents and sellers shouldn't tell you how much others have offered or if I imagined it, but I can honestly say that buying our most recent house, the estate agent told us the position of other interested parties and how much seller wanted to agree to the sale immediately, and our previous house the owner outright said someone else had offered asking as their top end, so anything at all over that would outdo them.

Ooh I wonder! Do the EA’s begin with an R? 😂 would absolutely love to know the situation of the others that have offered!!

The only reason we went so high was because we were told it was best and final upfront and a decision was being made at the end of the week so they didn’t have to do more viewings. This is the part that I’m a bit annoyed at - it’s made us play our hand early!!

OP posts:
Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 08:23

Malloryhitops · 21/04/2023 23:06

It really is a sellers market. They have seen the unprecedented interest and will be able to hold out for more money, and an uncomplicated seller I.e someone not in a property chain. Not surprising as if I was in the same boat I would probably do the same. It’s a massive purchase/sale so you’re going to hold out for the best possible offer. Still it’s rubbish to be on the receiving end. Don’t lose faith it may still very well work out, I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you 🤞

Thank you!! I really hope it works out for us!! If it doesn’t, it doesn’t!

OP posts:
Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 08:28

Grimbelina · 21/04/2023 22:56

I wouldn't accept your offer either because you hadn't sold your house. I would do exactly as the seller's are doing and accept the highest offer from someone who could actually proceed, even if your offer was higher.

But surely they would have accepted one of the other offers that were on the table? Assuming that they were all proceedable! My whole point is that they asked for everyone’s best and finals, they had six offers to choose from. I get that they don’t have to and not in a rush and it is their prerogative to see what else is out there etc but I dunno seems a bit underhand to say ‘give us your highest, we’re looking to choose and cancel future viewings’ then going with them anyways! That’s just me! Once the process properly gets going on our property maybe I will feel differently. Although, my thoughts are we’ve put an asking price for a reason - anything over is a bonus and we are lucky to get.

OP posts:
SD1978 · 22/04/2023 08:41

Yours isn't sold though, or even under offer. I wouldn't be relying on your offer, or anyone's who isn't actually ready to proceed. Regardless if if I liked them or not.

Grimbelina · 22/04/2023 08:47

They asked for best and final from the those who had viewed. Maybe, like you, none of none of those people could proceed...in which case I would also be having new viewings.

SunnyCoco · 22/04/2023 09:01

NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 08:28

But surely they would have accepted one of the other offers that were on the table? Assuming that they were all proceedable! My whole point is that they asked for everyone’s best and finals, they had six offers to choose from. I get that they don’t have to and not in a rush and it is their prerogative to see what else is out there etc but I dunno seems a bit underhand to say ‘give us your highest, we’re looking to choose and cancel future viewings’ then going with them anyways! That’s just me! Once the process properly gets going on our property maybe I will feel differently. Although, my thoughts are we’ve put an asking price for a reason - anything over is a bonus and we are lucky to get.

Show quote history

Because either a) none of the other offers were proceedable (like yours) or b) they've realised there's a lot of interest and they can get more money for it

LlynTegid · 22/04/2023 09:21

The problem in England and Wales is the law around house sale and purchase, you are just one of those affected by the spivs and chancers charter it is.

Set a short deadline for them saying yes, or you walk away.

Original poster
NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 09:33

SD1978 · 22/04/2023 08:41

Yours isn't sold though, or even under offer. I wouldn't be relying on your offer, or anyone's who isn't actually ready to proceed. Regardless if if I liked them or not.

In all honesty I thought it actually put us in a better position because they hadn’t found anywhere but clearly I’ve been a bit naive with that thought process!

OP posts:
TheNoodlesIncident · 22/04/2023 09:59

The house market has changed quite dramatically in recent years. It used to be OK to go look at houses when yours was on the market but not yet under offer, but it's tightened up so much. I suppose with sites like RightMove you already have a viewing of sorts, so physically going to look in reality is a much bigger step than it was. It seems to severely curtail the number of potential buyers viewing if they have to be proceedable with the money to buy accessible, but at least you'll only get buyers who are serious about buying. Which does make sense, really?

I don't want to be too pessimistic but you're not in a strong position at all, so I wouldn't get your hopes up too much with this property. It's likely that by the time you are proceedable with your own house sold (or as good as) the one you wanted will have sold to someone who has the funds available now. It's tough, but it's how it is at the minute. It does sound like a very desirable property, they definitely don't hang around too long. Hopefully you'll get lucky and any sale may fall through when you are in a position to offer... 🙏

Daddydog · 22/04/2023 11:13

One lesson we learnt the hard way, until the exchange, keep letting the odd serious buyer view as a backup. It's a business transaction and if you decide after the survey to walk away, or see a better property or can't make the financials work - getting on well with the seller's suddenly wouldnt mean anything to you. I like the idea of meeting with the buyers. I think your own gut feeling on a buyer is far better then any EAs. Most EA we dealt with just had to open and close the doors. To those EA, every offer was mysteriously 'motivated, chain free, paying in cash ' to get the house STC, only to transpire half way down the process this isn't the case!

Erex · 22/04/2023 13:54

NewKidOnTheBlock99 · 22/04/2023 08:23

Ooh I wonder! Do the EA’s begin with an R? 😂 would absolutely love to know the situation of the others that have offered!!

The only reason we went so high was because we were told it was best and final upfront and a decision was being made at the end of the week so they didn’t have to do more viewings. This is the part that I’m a bit annoyed at - it’s made us play our hand early!!

Show quote history

Ah this one begins with a C, nice house in a fairly popular suburb but was in serious need of modernisation, decor was stuck in the 70s/80s!

That was a bit underhand of the estate agent - we've previously been told to give our best offer before, I asked if it was best and final and they wouldn't answer - just advised us that we'd be best giving an offer as high as we could. We took that to mean "you'll get it but we want to get as much as possible out of you". It is hard to tell if they're being genuine sometimes, last time I said outright that we weren't interested in a bidding war, and that's when we were told no other viewers were proceedable, so an offer of X amount would get us the house since the seller knew we were SSTC for cash.

It's frustrating, but it would probably be better to start looking and booking viewings when you've sold your house. That way you can tell sellers you've sold and already have solicitors instructed, etc. so you won't be holding the chain up (that's what we wanted - cash or first time buyers). It is an awful process though, I do sympathise! I don't want to move again for a very long time now. 😂