Exposing Cafcass and the Flying Monkeys

[SpringMum30]

I don’t know why I was shocked when going through the complaints procedure with Cafcass because my expectations were already low, but they were so dismissive it was almost unbelievable.

I was a victim of coercive control and Cafcass claim to have a protocol to explore this:
-The extent with which these factors remain present in the relationship
-The current risk to victim and child
-The impact on parenting capacity
-The impact on the child
-Mitigating protective factors

The only factor the Cafcass officer explored was:
-The impact on parenting capacity

The Cafcass officer commented that it could ‘impact her emotionally’. Sounds like victim blaming to me! No mention of any other factor. After leaving my ex I’ve had malicious ss referrals, lies about my mental health, the smear campaign, finances withdrawn, belongings withheld etc.He has also caused emotional harm to our children.

When questioning why the Cafcass officer didn’t explore all factors of coercive control she said she didn’t have to! No sweat Sherlock but it’s your responsibility to do your due diligence and to ignore something so significant is negligent at best!

I had a phone conversation with someone who deals with complaints who spent the entire time talking about why I shouldn’t complain and what I could have done before starting the complaints process.

I’m looking into speaking to my local MP to complain to the PHSO to see if I can make any progress that way. I urge anyone else if you can find the strength to take these measure with these shoddy Cafcass reports. They will have to listen eventually. With these new coercive control laws in place they’ll not be able to so easily brush it under the carpet either!

Hi, @Mum2023 ,

I emailed them to start with and asked for a conversation. They hold surgery sessions, so I went along to one of those and took the form along with me. They reviewed the form and signed it.

I’m sorry there are so many of you going through this. It’s appalling.

We had a dreadful Cafcass Officer when DH went through the courts. She did so many of the things you’re all describing. Barely knew the kids, misrepresented comments from them, bent over backwards to excuse abusive behaviour from the other parent, and didn’t speak to any other involved parties, including the schools. Very luckily indeed she told him what her decision was going to be before she filed, which gave him an opportunity to act, and she found that every single professional involved with the children contacted her proactively. It ended up in the ridiculous situation of her filing her original report and recommendations but then revealing what social services/school/therapist/neighbours had said while on the stand in court and verbally changing the recommendation. The judge was furious as they quite rightly pointed out the danger of this approach had anything happened to her.

Her report included a list of offences committed by a man with the same, not unusual, name as DH in the town he’d been living in a few years earlier - gave no context to make it clear it demonstrably wasn’t him. And pointed out he’d taken a drug and alcohol test as part of initial
proceedings (at his ex’s insistence) without then saying that it had been totally clear. It was a dog’s dinner.

Then, after the hearing, she approached DH in the car park and said she totally agreed with behaviour she’d criticised in her report and she’d have done the same.

His barrister said she was the worst example of a Cafcass officer they’d ever seen in action.

How do I get around her awful report ? She has lied on everything and not wanting to hear my side, I’ve got legal team but they said it can go either way depends on judge and magistrate, also has anyone been assisted by SS for cafcass referral section 37 ? What’s involved I’ve never been in trouble for anything now doubting my
parenting skills. Any tips will be most appreciated

Hi would anyone be willing to join me to get our voices heard ?

@Mum2023 have you got professionals who can offer evidence of what she has lied about?

she completely didn’t want to hear my side of the story and said quote “your ex has told me about it we don’t need to go through this” DV she didn’t want to hear whilst she was putty in my ex’s hands holding in to his every word she is clearly parent alienating me I’m assuming it’s the pressure from above to do this to good mums as they are easy targets. She has failed to answer questions numerous times and i questioned her she referred me to SS for abusing my children. After watching dispatches on torn family’s and reading guardian articles on cafcass it’s a clear failing and a certain pattern they are following like a trend without any remorse on how this effects children in the real world

And cafcass has 90% in court there wold against us as parents who have nurtured our kids but clearly from a 0 min chat they know our children better then us mums who have only given birth and looked after them

I wouldn’t trust anyone from Cafcass to tell the truth ever . They seem to have their own Agenda and seem untouchable . Complaints go unheard . This was our experience 20+ years ago I’m so angry to hear they are still the same

Then let’s all get together and get our voices heard get a petition going get this out in the media. We all need justice because these people are destroying our lives and our childrens

We need our kids to complain when they're older.

Hi all please sign this petition
https://chng.it/g6NgmPWb7t

I've only scan read them so far.....but I've just got Cafcass complaint report 2 back...which seems to admit I am right on lots of their mistakes.....but never mind because the court decide....

And also an Ombudsman reply which seems lighter than I expected.

Does anyone have any advice please? My plan is to read the Cafcass reply.....summarise their failings and then reply in a summary back to the Ombudsman..

Then what? It seems the whole system just keeps lifting carpets and sweeping stuff under it.

I recently went through the section 7 process after I was honest about my ex husband being emotionally abusive.
The officer did no investigation into my claims at all.

I had screen shots of repetitive phone calls, he messed with child maintenance, hasn’t stuck to the current court order. I’m currently on round 3 of court proceedings (all applied for by him), I’ve had abusive messages and false accusations from my ex’s sister and his girlfriend.

I have evidence of support from IDAS and Survive. He’s made false allegations about me with holding his finances in our relationship. I have evidence of it being the opposite way round.

I told him that he was aggressive during our relationship. I have been physically restrained by this man, he punched walls, kicked toys and objects in front of the children.
My ex is a teacher and in 2017 got into trouble at work because he threw a chair in front of his class because a pupil ‘wound him up.’ I told CAFCASS about this, they didn’t investigate it. My parents witnessed him hitting objects, they didn’t speak to them.
What CAFCASS did do was take his account that he punched a wall once in 2010 (he actually punched the wall until his knuckles bled because I disagreed with him) and said that they were confident that it was an isolated incident. FYI this man is still working in the same school.

They interviewed his current girlfriend and added her personal opinions and allowed her to make accusations against me. His girlfriend has never met me or spoken to me. The CAFCASS officer didn’t interview anyone from my side so that she could have a balanced point of view.

I was open and honest about the fact that I had said some things in front of the children, that I wasn’t proud of it, but it hadn’t been intensional. She’s assumed that I’m trying to turn the children against their Father, which is false, I was at breaking point.
The section 7 report basically called me liar and the night that I received it I tried to kill myself.
Since then, I’ve been in therapy and I am being treat for PTSD (hence the outbursts). They did an addendum report in which my doctor confirmed that I had had repetitive mental health problems and had regularly mentioned my ex husband.

Despite all of this my ex is potentially about to get a 50/50 split. My child is already coming home and describing gaslighting from both my ex and his partner. The other child is telling me that daddy ignores her and is always on his phone and that she doesn't sleep at her dad’s house.

The court process and CAFCASS is in urgent need of change, before anymore harm comes to anymore children and parents.

@TealBiscuit oh my goodness. That is awful. I am sorry.

I formally complained to CAFCASS. They were shocking, and didn't reply for ages and made mistakes in that....

I complained a second time and also complained via an Ombudsman. Again, they ignored it all but I feel it leaves a key trail of evidence and also shows that I at least tried.

I wouldn't wish the Family Court system on anyone. Sending support xxx

@TitaniumTess Thank you.
They gave him the 50/50.
I sat there and listened to him blatantly lie to the court and on top of that, I was told by complete strangers that I’d failed as a parent because I no longer have direct contact with their Father.
I was told by the police not to have direct contact with him so that I can protect my mental health and protect myself against false allegations. I have not had direct contact with him in over six months.
The courts reward abuse and protect the abusers.

xx

@TitaniumTess I forgot to mention that when we split up, I was a stay at home Mum. I was left with a mortgage and living on universal credits.
In less than 5 years, I completely re trained, I now have a job that is pushing £40k. I managed to secure the mortgage so that the children have been able to stay in their home, they have their own rooms, can stay at their school, and have security. I still turn up to every school activity with bells on.
Since we split, my ex has moved house 3 times.
I can’t say whether or not his current relationship is abusive because I’m not there, but what I can do is identify the red flags.
My ex was living with his gf 8 months after us splitting. He moved her in during lockdown, so quite literal isolation.
Within 3 years they’d had another child.
His gf has never spoken to me, the only things that she knows about me are what my ex and his family have told her.
I know that they ended up in huge amounts of debt in the space of around 2 years after our split.
For anyone that doesn’t know, getting together with the man of your dreams so quickly is more often that not lovebombing and the early signs of an abusive partner, not being swept off your feet. This is exactly what happened to me.
Now they own a house, but it has 3 bedrooms. My ex told the court that they have no solid plans at the minute of how to create an extra bedroom. He said they would either move house (again) or build an extra bedroom in 2 to 5 years!
My son is currently in the process of an autism diagnosis. He sometimes has melt downs and needs his own space, yet he is going to have to share a room with a child that is 8 years younger than him. So when my son is in secondary school, he will be sharing a room with a primary school child.

Honsetly it blows my mind xx

I agree. But being strong enough to carry it through is another thing.

Been through similar - one visit to his nice house in a leafy suburb and everything I said about the cc/ongoing abuse was tossed out the window. I hope you get somewhere with your complaint

What would you do?