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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

A rant really and am I to be annoyed?

54 replies

ranty · 19/04/2023 18:19

So this week has been a shit how really. I started my new job last week, first one in over seven years but this week they are letting me 'work' from home as they've gone away this week to a meeting so I'm just doing training videos. The nursery my DD goes to full time phones me on Monday and tells me that she might have chicken pox as she has some little spots but not to come and get her as she's fine in herself, no temp etc so we get her at the end of the day and she's totally fine. The next day they call me and tell me she's done two loose poo's and if she does another I'll have to come and get her but once again she's fine in herself. At the end of the day they say she's done a third so she can't come in for two days. Again, she's totally fine with no temp and is playful. So today, I've not been able to really do any training for my new job which I really want to do well at (partner has to work as well so he couldn't have her today) as when shes home with me she just wants my attention (16 months old). Now I understand nursery's need to take precautions but it's not the first time they've done this, they've asked me to get her before when I've had a week off because she's grouchy and just wants to sleep (no temp and not unwell) I obvs rush to get her when she is unwell but AIBU that I pay £1500 a month but have to keep getting her and having her off so they can be careful just incase? Especially when I've just started a new job and she is totally well. I love her nursery and they are great but it's really stressed me out as my partner will take tomorrow off to look after her but will lose out on a £400 job..

OP posts:
GoodChat · 19/04/2023 18:20

If they allowed other children in sick and your daughter caught it, would you be ok with that?

They take precautions for a reason. She's had multiple loose stools. It's the luck of the draw.

DrMarciaFieldstone · 19/04/2023 18:22

That’s nursery life with kids, I’m afraid. If they didn’t send them home, more of them would be in spreading illness, and the chances are your DC would have even more sickness/time off.

It does get better as they get older.

Greensleevevssnotnose · 19/04/2023 18:23

If you are not earning i0ver 400£ why can you look after your child? Makes sense as you will be home anyway.

mainsfed · 19/04/2023 18:24

There was a thread where people said the nursery were sending children home because they didn’t have the staff ratio, but blaming it on the child being sick.

Wonder if this is happening here if they call you take her home justice because she’s grouchy.

mainsfed · 19/04/2023 18:26

Greensleevevssnotnose · 19/04/2023 18:23

If you are not earning i0ver 400£ why can you look after your child? Makes sense as you will be home anyway.

OP has just started a new job, it stands to reason that she wants to work at this job.

Sounds liker DH is self employed.

Better for OP to work.

Disneyblueeyes · 19/04/2023 18:27

How annoying.

Not much to say though really. It's just how it is with young children.

Nurseries tend to be over cautious nowadays espec with staffing issues.

Hopefully your employer is understanding.

Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 18:36

@GoodChat its happened many times when she's caught an illness, I know it's nursery and it happens. I understand they need to take precautions but she obviously isn't unwell and the loose stools have stopped as it was just something she ate. This is why I am frustrated as it's been two different things they've called me for over two days. They thought she had chicken pox but didn't even rush me to get her? They said she can stay I just need to make sure it isn't actually pox when I've picked her up at the end of the day :/

OP posts:
Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 18:37

@Greensleevevssnotnose I do earn over £400, its my other half who has a job tomorrow which he will make £400 for but has to cancel

OP posts:
Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 18:38

@mainsfed I think this is it, as they only have one employee working in the babies room at the moment so other members have to keep coming in to help (there should be three)

OP posts:
Heroicallyfound · 19/04/2023 18:43

Annoying but normal for the first year of nursery. Brace yourself for a few more illnesses and then it calms down!

Greensleevevssnotnose · 19/04/2023 19:17

mainsfed · 19/04/2023 18:26

OP has just started a new job, it stands to reason that she wants to work at this job.

Sounds liker DH is self employed.

Better for OP to work.

Show quote history

She watching training videos, they can be done whilst the child is sleeping

Greensleevevssnotnose · 19/04/2023 19:20

ranty · 19/04/2023 18:37

@Greensleevevssnotnose I do earn over £400, its my other half who has a job tomorrow which he will make £400 for but has to cancel

That's brilliant you both make £400 a day. Not sure what you are complaining about then really! Of course the nursery can't take a sick child. Perhaps a nanny would suit you better? I thought you were concerned about loss of earnings. Apologies

GoodChat · 19/04/2023 19:20

ranty · 19/04/2023 18:36

@GoodChat its happened many times when she's caught an illness, I know it's nursery and it happens. I understand they need to take precautions but she obviously isn't unwell and the loose stools have stopped as it was just something she ate. This is why I am frustrated as it's been two different things they've called me for over two days. They thought she had chicken pox but didn't even rush me to get her? They said she can stay I just need to make sure it isn't actually pox when I've picked her up at the end of the day :/

I understand their inconsistencies are frustrating.

Would you have been as annoyed about the loose stools if they hadn't phoned every day this week?

Now that you've said they are short staffed I'm wondering if they're trying to fob children off for the week.

GoodChat · 19/04/2023 19:22

@Greensleevevssnotnose she misunderstood your question. She's not earning £400 a day watching training videos.

SauvignonBlanche · 19/04/2023 19:22

YABU, those are basic infection control guidelines.

Can’t you watch the videos in the evening once DH is home?

moveoverye · 19/04/2023 19:22

Can you not watch the training videos in the evening instead?

Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 19:23

@Greensleevevssnotnose I don't make £400 a day and neither does my partner, this was a one off job someone has asked him to do. I wish we both make that much! Whilst I can do training whilst my child sleeps, unfortunately that's only 1.5 hours out of my 8 hour working day :/

OP posts:
ChristineCricket · 19/04/2023 19:25

ranty · 19/04/2023 19:23

@Greensleevevssnotnose I don't make £400 a day and neither does my partner, this was a one off job someone has asked him to do. I wish we both make that much! Whilst I can do training whilst my child sleeps, unfortunately that's only 1.5 hours out of my 8 hour working day :/

Oh come on you can watch in the evening after she goes to bed.

Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 19:26

@GoodChat no I wouldn't have been as bothered if they hadn't have called Monday 'suspecting chicken pox'. I just feel like they've been planting the seed to have her sent home and looking for any reason possible? Because if they were so concerned it was chicken pox, they should have had me get her there and then surely?

OP posts:
Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 19:29

@ChristineCricket yes I could watch training videos whilst she goes to bed but this isn't the point of my post. My job is 8:30 - 5pm, my partner goes to another job at 7pm in the evenings so I also have to make dinner and tidy and do washing etc. Its not going to look good on me missing a DAY of training when this is what my employers are expecting. Especially when DD is not actually unwell.

OP posts:
Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 19:30

@SauvignonBlanche I totally understand this and I know they have a policy but I am peeved as I feel they were planting the seeds with 'suspected chickenpox' on Monday but didn't say I had to come and get her and they said she could stay?!

OP posts:
Mochinated · 19/04/2023 19:34

YABU that's not nearly enough to be called a shit show of a day!

Yes it's annoying but totally normal and I'd be glad DC was actually well!

Original poster
ranty · 19/04/2023 19:38

@Mochinated I have had other issues this week they have not been mentioned, maybe I should have also mentioned this so it explains why it's been a shit show of a week..

Whilst I am extremely grateful my child is well, I am feeling peeved that they are sending her home when she is and the nursery started 'planting the seeds' for an illness from the start of the week.. if they have infection control then surely first thing Monday they would have asked me to get my DD when they suspected chicken pox??

OP posts:
StupidCupidKeepsOnCallinMe · 19/04/2023 19:41

Crikey, people are missing the point. It's a huge pain for nursery to send a well child home 'as a precaution'. How is it manageable to hold down a job when your kid is spending more time at home than nursery!

Work are rarely understanding, especially when your child is sent home so often. You're lucky you're home this week really as it wouldn't look good if you had to take leave this early on and leave the office.

PollyPeptide · 19/04/2023 19:41

Did she have some little spots on the Monday or did they completely make that up? Is her poo loose or is it OK now?

If neither of those carried on away from the nursery, then I think you have a right to feel you're being conned.

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