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AIBU?

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Original poster

A plea to dog-owners

284 replies

Dogsonleads · 19/04/2023 14:00

Please keep boisterous dogs on leads if you have no intention on controlling their behaviour

When walking in woodland with my 10 year old DS this morning pre school (because we were ridiculously early), a fully grown and very boisterous Labrador jumped fully up and put his paws on my sons upper chest. very exited dog, barking, more jumping. Before I can react, my sons runs into my arms and the dog continues to jump, now onto my son’s back.

At this stage the owner comes round the corner, the dog rubs off and I try to call out that this really is not acceptable. Calmly. I get a perfunctory sorry, the dog is being ignored, bounds back, jumps up my legs and manages to “Kiss me on the mouth”. Again, a perfunctory sorry and the owner walks away. Is this acceptable? (At this point I lost my calm 😞and shouted after them as I was upset at being brushed aside, no swear words though )
No attempt to reign in/ educate the dog?

It has taken me probably 5 years to get my son comfortable around dogs, had this happened only 2 years ago he would have been in an all out panic.

so my plea is to please please keep large dogs in sight if they have the tendency to jump, or at least try to mitigate situations that are difficult for others.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Saucery · 21/04/2023 07:20

I’m sorry your thread attracted the more extreme end of dog-hating views @Dogsonleads .
I hope your DS finds the tips given helpful. And also that he doesn’t have any more surprise encounters in the woods! Even a medium-largish dog jumping at you when you are a child can be upsetting, because of the size differential.

Some people just never like dogs and that’s fine. Dog owners do have a responsibility to try and ensure their dogs cause no nuisance when out and about and if things go wrong, to apologise honestly.
Sometimes you just can’t predict who will grow up comfortable around dogs and who won’t. I was exposed to the same dogs as my sister growing up. I was bitten twice (different dogs, different times), jumped on, growled at…….didn’t put me off at all. I developed an interest in why the dog was behaving like that and what to do to when it happened. Can’t imagine not having a dog in my life, got one as soon as I could. My sister dislikes them, is nervous of them and would never have one. Again, that’s fine. She’d never hurt one, though.

EggInANest · 21/04/2023 08:03

@Cheapcookies But ground nesting birds haven’t been trained to ignore your dog. They fly up, startled, which alerts predators to their nest / eggs, or may just abandon the nest.

Saucery · 21/04/2023 09:32

There was a woman on Countryfile this week who had ‘trained’ her dogs to look for (I think) Pine Martens so you would get an idea of the area and if rare species were returning there. I was very Hmm about it, as it just looked like a Spaniel having a good old root around in the woodland, which surely can’t be conducive to attracting rare species back, or bird life there.

StupidFaces · 21/04/2023 09:38

KateyCuckoo · 19/04/2023 14:19

Equally, please teach children not to approach my dog.

This isn’t about you

StupidFaces · 21/04/2023 09:40

YANBU, I would have gone mental and grabbed the dog by the neck and held it down to the ground until the owner came to restrain it.

Saucery · 21/04/2023 09:47

That’s unnecessarily combative @StupidFaces .

There’s a need for children to be taught the correct way to approach a dog and that starts with asking if you can in the first place. The number of children who still put their hand out above the dog’s head is worrying. Many dogs, even if used to children and ‘steady’ don’t like that. Hand out slightly for dog to sniff and only if you know that dog is ok with that.

I‘ve seen so many families out with dogs and the children are picking them up, hugging them, teasing them……the dogs are giving out clear signals they don’t like it, but the adult owners are oblivious. There are an awful lot of very patient dogs out there! Then if that patience runs out it’s always the adult owner’s fault. Not the child’s (who hasn’t been taught any different) and not the dog’s (who has been giving out signals like lip licking, yawning, trying to move away, growling).

Saucery · 21/04/2023 09:47

StupidFaces · 21/04/2023 09:40

YANBU, I would have gone mental and grabbed the dog by the neck and held it down to the ground until the owner came to restrain it.

Would ye, aye? Grin

AncientToaster · 21/04/2023 09:48

A woman has been attacked in my home town last week, her and her small dog were both injured. it’s not made national headlines. A spaniel really barked and ran at me out on a walk on Sunday, it didn’t jump up thankfully. Owner apologised It did the same thing to a couple of people a few feet behind, she apologised again, it would have been at toddler height and possibly really scared a small child. It’s obvious her dog needed to be on a lead.

StupidFaces · 21/04/2023 09:49

Saucery · 21/04/2023 09:47

Would ye, aye? Grin

Show quote history

Yes I would, and have done previously.

Saucery · 21/04/2023 09:50

Sure, @StupidFaces . If you say so 🙄

vivainsomnia · 21/04/2023 09:54

All these threads make me so thankful I chose a small adorable and harmless looking dog so that I've no experience of all the animosity shared here.

My dog is very well behaved. They only approach, if in the mood, people who want to pet them. They do approach other dogs, after assessing if they are ok with it. Somehow they have a flair for it, probably because they know they are the most vulnerable due to their size.

The biggest worry is indeed children coming to them as doggy is scared of them but it very very rarely happens.

All in all, walks, on lead or off is very relaxing and pleasant. I'm still to meet someone showing fear of my dog. For this reason, I'll probably always pick small cute dogs. Can't be bothered to be on high alert, anxious that someone might react to my dog just because it is big and I losing, even if perfectly well behaved.

Pinkjacket22 · 21/04/2023 09:55

carriedout · 19/04/2023 14:29

I'm sick of bad dog/owner behaviour and I think it is time for people to start campaigning for dog bans in more places. Many places that were previously dog free now let them in, and those places have been made much less pleasant as a result.

We need some separation back.

This! I'm a keen runner and sick of having to stop cos a dog is off lead and running at me and barking. I managed to get rid of my fear of dogs only for it now to be back. The type of people who let their dogs off lead seem to be the types that make no apology for it. Often it happens yards from my front door and there was one when I was trying to go cycling going absolutely mental at me cos it doesn't like bikes. Put it on a lead then!!! I hate going running later on in the day for this reason I get up early to run.

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 09:56

At this stage the owner comes round the corner, the dog rubs off and I try to call out that this really is not acceptable. Calmly. I get a perfunctory sorry, the dog is being ignored, bounds back, jumps up my legs and manages to “Kiss me on the mouth”.

As long as he didn't 'tongue you' I think you will be alright* *@Dogsonleads

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 09:58

To those people who run in places where dogs are allowed off the lead, go and run somewhere else if you don't like it.

LongPond · 21/04/2023 10:22

Pinkjacket22 · 21/04/2023 09:55

This! I'm a keen runner and sick of having to stop cos a dog is off lead and running at me and barking. I managed to get rid of my fear of dogs only for it now to be back. The type of people who let their dogs off lead seem to be the types that make no apology for it. Often it happens yards from my front door and there was one when I was trying to go cycling going absolutely mental at me cos it doesn't like bikes. Put it on a lead then!!! I hate going running later on in the day for this reason I get up early to run.

Show quote history

My husband used to love running on Hampstead Heath. He is also a dog-lover. He has run there for years and years.

He has now given up because of the number of owners who let their off-lead dogs chase him and disrupt his run. A couple have nipped him whilst running.

According to people like @Softoprider this is his fault for running there. The dogs now take priority.

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 10:27

He has now given up because of the number of owners who let their off-lead dogs chase him and disrupt his run. A couple have nipped him whilst running.

Well @Longpond Some of these couples ought to be shot. What did they nip him with?

Goodoccasionallypoor · 21/04/2023 10:28

I hate it and would fully support introducing a dog licence system that's paid for my licence holders.

I was walking in the local park a couple of weeks ago, a brown lab came bounding down a hill and jumped straight up at me. He was covered in mud and caught his claw on my coat pocket and tore it. He almost knocked me into the lake I was next to as well.

The owners weren't in sight and when I saw them and told them what happened, they laughed!

I saw the same dog yesterday, he was jumping into the lake, right next to a nesting swan which was getting distressed. The owner was oblivious.

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 10:34

It's always the brown labs that give every other dog a bad name @Goodoccasionallypoor
Avoid the brown labs at all cost

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 10:38

I bet it was overweight as well.. the brown ones always are

HeadsShouldersKneesAllHurt · 21/04/2023 10:40

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 10:27

He has now given up because of the number of owners who let their off-lead dogs chase him and disrupt his run. A couple have nipped him whilst running.

Well @Longpond Some of these couples ought to be shot. What did they nip him with?

You are not as funny as you think you are. I won’t engage, sorry.

Saucery · 21/04/2023 10:43

Ahh no @Softoprider have to disagree with you there. Our previous Lab was a working line Chocolate Lab and she was leggy, slim and active. She could chase a runner or cyclist for miiiiiilllles Grin

^that last sentence is, of course, a joke.
She took a lot of training, though. Not the working breed for anyone who wants a couch potato with half an hour potter round the block a day.

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 21/04/2023 10:43

There’s a need for children to be taught the correct way to approach a dog and that starts with asking if you can in the first place. The number of children who still put their hand out above the dog’s head is worrying. Many dogs, even if used to children and ‘steady’ don’t like that. Hand out slightly for dog to sniff and onlyif you know that dog is ok with that.

Totally agree. It's just a shame most of my children's interactions with strange dogs involve a bouncy dog running up to them and jumping up whilst their owners go "it's OK, they're friendly". Dc1 is terrified despite our best efforts because of negative experiences with random dogs (including a particularly bad one as a toddler in a park clearly labeled "dogs must be on a lead"). Dc2 is fine despite many similar experiences so personality is obviously a factor. I've gone from being a dog lover to considerably less tolerant (unless the dog in question is a spaniel).

Saltired · 21/04/2023 10:47

StupidFaces · 21/04/2023 09:40

YANBU, I would have gone mental and grabbed the dog by the neck and held it down to the ground until the owner came to restrain it.

That would be a very stupid thing to do, likely to result in a bite.

Softoprider · 21/04/2023 10:49

I like your style @Saucery What we need is a little humour here because it's nag nag nag these days. I wonder if some of these posters would do better if they carried a bag of treats with them when out walking.. just to be friendly like or a stick to throw for their new friend in the woods?

Saucery · 21/04/2023 10:49

@Dinosauratemydaffodils that is totally unacceptable and before we got our first Lab it happened to us quite a lot too. She didn’t take kindly to unwanted bouncy approaches from other dogs so that solved that problem nicely!
I’m not tolerant at all of idiots who don’t train their dogs. I can tell the difference between the odd Recall Fail and Don’t Give A Shit If You Don’t Like My Dog Jumping Up At You, so my response does vary.
Mainly, I walk early, in areas where I know it is likely to be quiet. Always on the look out for unexpected people like OP and her DS, though.