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Original poster

to be sick to death of wanky language?!

423 replies

PyongyangKipperbang · 19/04/2023 01:51

Late shift so cant sleep and this has been bugging me.

Loads of examples I am sure but the two that are currently pissing me off is "curating" and "sourcing".

When did "buy new clothes" become "curate a fresh wardrobe". I do not curate, I am not a curator. I need clothes, I buy clothes, I wear clothes. End of. Also clothes do no go off, they go out of fashion but if that is the case then you are buying the wrong clothes, timeless classics never go out of fashion. You do not need "fresh" clothes.

When did "going to do the big shop" become "sourcing ingedients". Has anyone ever said "I am going to Tesco to source our ingredients"? Have they fuck! If I am making stew or salad or lasagne or.....dog shit on toast (an option I have occassionally offered the kids when they were pissing me off about dinner options) I will go shopping and buy what I need. I do not "source" beef and vegetables, or lettuce or bloody pasta. I will concede that the dog shit may need more in the way of sourcing.

You need stuff. You buy stuff. Why the need for bullshit language to make this boring life task into an "experience".....actually that's another one, I didnt "experience" a restaurant or a stately home or whatever, I visited it.

Now I cant sleep even more because venting has made me more angry!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
StoatofDisarray · 19/04/2023 10:19

PlinkPlonkFizz · 19/04/2023 10:13

Beauty videos are a lexicon of unnecessary words.
"I'm going to go in with some...." - put some
"I'm going to drop some pumps of X" - put a pump of X
"Blend it out with...." - blend it with

The rage. 😡

Omg this, and "I'm going to do a smokey eye" or "a red lip" as if your body parts are completely unconnected to you.

the80sweregreat · 19/04/2023 10:20

Seeing the queues in most chain coffee shops or cafes in my town , I'm shocked anyone can 'grab ' anything without waiting for twenty minutes for it ! A slow grab

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 19/04/2023 10:25

KimberleyClark · 19/04/2023 09:54

When I was working I was often told off for my emails being abrupt but I was just being precise and to the point. Which I thought was a good thing.

When my husband was still working he was one of two people who sometimes had to send a circular email to the entire organisation when there were IT problems. I worked there too so saw these emails. My husband, never a man to use two words where one will do, or even better, none, would write something like

Please note entire IT system will be down for essential maintenance Tuesday 15th April 8am-9am.

Gasp0de'sHusband

His colleague would write something more like

Dear Colleagues

Apologies for any inconvenience, but the entire IT system will be down for essential maintenance on Tuesday 15th April from 8am to 9am. We attempt to minimise these outages but they are occasionally unavoidable and we hope the advance notice will enable you and your teams to work around this. We anticipate everything will be back up and running smoothly as early as possible after that, and will of course update the website notifications if there are any delays. The systems affected will include [blah blah blah]

Please don't hesitate to contact me if you need further clarification or have any concerns.

Kind regards,

Gasp0de'sHusband'sColleague

CellophaneFlower · 19/04/2023 10:26

It's always "bunch of" these days too. Not flowers obviously, they're allowed.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 19/04/2023 10:28

UnDruidlyWords · 19/04/2023 10:18

That one has been bugging me for years. I see the encouragement of people 'grabbing' things - Grab and Go! - as being the start of the downfall of society.

Show quote history

Also, why do people claim to throw things in the oven or chuck ingredients in a pan? I don't know about other people, but when I am cooking I like to try to use controlled movements to avoid burns and scalds and ending up with a lot of burnt on mess on the hob or oven. I assume others are similar, so why use verbs more appropriate for the sports pitch?

FunnysInLaJardin · 19/04/2023 10:28

Puppyseahorse · 19/04/2023 08:57

Space.

curate airy, beautiful spaces in your home.

it’s a ROOM.

and piece.

this dress is a vintage piece I found on portobello road

ITS A DRESS

Oh god, space.

I used to shout loudly at Grand Designs for that. IT'S A ROOM NOT A SPACE!

xogossipgirlxo · 19/04/2023 10:32

ssd · 19/04/2023 09:59

Agree with everything here but can i add the one seen above 'I snorted tea out my nose' or similar wanky shite

Im shouting at my phone NO YOU NEVER

Haha, I agree. Same with "I spat coffee on my screen". Sure you did, because you read comment on mumsnet.

ditalini · 19/04/2023 10:32

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 19/04/2023 10:25

When my husband was still working he was one of two people who sometimes had to send a circular email to the entire organisation when there were IT problems. I worked there too so saw these emails. My husband, never a man to use two words where one will do, or even better, none, would write something like

Please note entire IT system will be down for essential maintenance Tuesday 15th April 8am-9am.

Gasp0de'sHusband

His colleague would write something more like

Dear Colleagues

Apologies for any inconvenience, but the entire IT system will be down for essential maintenance on Tuesday 15th April from 8am to 9am. We attempt to minimise these outages but they are occasionally unavoidable and we hope the advance notice will enable you and your teams to work around this. We anticipate everything will be back up and running smoothly as early as possible after that, and will of course update the website notifications if there are any delays. The systems affected will include [blah blah blah]

Please don't hesitate to contact me if you need further clarification or have any concerns.

Kind regards,

Gasp0de'sHusband'sColleague

Show quote history

Excellent work GaspodesHusband, but is "Please note" also possibly redundant here? I'm reading your email so I'm by default "noting".

As I'm typing this I've realised how hypocritical I'm being as we have a grumpy IT bod who writes extremely sparse outage emails and I always feel I'm being barked at when I read them.

UnDruidlyWords · 19/04/2023 10:34

why do people claim to throw things in the oven or chuck ingredients in a pan?

See, that's why pictures on recipes have half the ingredients scattered about on the worktop rather than in the bowl.

to be sick to death of wanky language?!
woodenfork · 19/04/2023 10:35

UnDruidlyWords · 19/04/2023 10:34

why do people claim to throw things in the oven or chuck ingredients in a pan?

See, that's why pictures on recipes have half the ingredients scattered about on the worktop rather than in the bowl.

😂😂

AutumnCrow · 19/04/2023 10:36

Guiltridden12345 · 19/04/2023 09:16

Someone may have already got this in, but ‘gifting’ drives me wild. Gift is a noun. To give is the verb. Why have we verbified the noun?

Verbing The Noun sounds like a 1980s pop group, probably from the Edinburgh area with a female singer who has auburn curly hair and a tambourine and a guitarist called Milo.

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 19/04/2023 10:37

ditalini · 19/04/2023 10:32

Excellent work GaspodesHusband, but is "Please note" also possibly redundant here? I'm reading your email so I'm by default "noting".

As I'm typing this I've realised how hypocritical I'm being as we have a grumpy IT bod who writes extremely sparse outage emails and I always feel I'm being barked at when I read them.

Show quote history

Yes, as I read that back I think I'm doing him a disservice. He probably didn't put in anything as frivolous as Please note. Grin

Switchwitch · 19/04/2023 10:41

I don't like 'edit' and 'drop' as in 'the new season edit is about to drop'. So you have a range of new clothes in then?

Cantuserealname · 19/04/2023 10:41

I watched one of those gardening makeover shows and the adults were wittering on about how they were all about the whole 'from farm to fork' ethos and were so pleased to be part of this. No, you do not have acres of land you have a tiny little vegetable bed that your toddler will get bored of and next doors cat will shit in.

TheOrigRights · 19/04/2023 10:43

We used to drink and eat.
Now we hydrate and fuel.

FFS - have a glass of water and eat a sodding banana.

woodenfork · 19/04/2023 10:43

@UnDruidlyWords
"Putting" is not good enough nowadays. Neither is simply standing next to the counter to bake.
You need to be at least 2 meters away to enable you to fully participate in the dance routine that you "choreographed" so I feel that throwing in the ingredients is understandable due to distance requirements 😆.

TheOrigRights · 19/04/2023 10:44

RollingDownTheRiver · 19/04/2023 09:49

I hate it when someone wants to "share something with you" instead of telling it to you. The only thing I want to share is cake!

YABU to want to share cake Grin

Cantuserealname · 19/04/2023 10:44

Impartictful
Impartial
Impartial
Trying to type impactful but the dictionary does not recognise it. Neither do I.

TheOrigRights · 19/04/2023 10:46

narrative
lived experience
nuance

Mercurial123 · 19/04/2023 10:46

Where did adore come from for liking clothes? It's all over Style and Beauty. The word cheering is also annoying. Anyone who refers to a handbag as "she" needs help.

DdraigGoch · 19/04/2023 10:47

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 19/04/2023 09:24

Research. No longer restricted to academics and scientists.

I researched the transport options.

No, you looked up the train times.

Announce, as in pregnancy. Sounds so incredibly self-important. Assume this is because of social media. In olden times, we just told people.

"I've done my own research"

No, you watched a batshit conspiracy theory on Youtube.

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 19/04/2023 10:48

It's 'curated' for me too (mostly seen by me in those home interiors magazines to which I am guiltily devoted). They 'curate' their books or their ornaments, or even their sofa! And then they add a 'pop' of colour...

No, loves. You put things on a shelf and change the cushions.

SalmonEile · 19/04/2023 10:49

I hate
“little slice of heaven “ to describe a garden or property
I don’t know why it just annoys me

Tiredandtested2 · 19/04/2023 10:50

Oh op I feel you
the one I hated was when the the dc’s where younger, one of my DC’s is SN & we had a support worker who would use ‘family unit’ all the time.
we’re not from ikea!

UnDruidlyWords · 19/04/2023 10:51

Another recipe picture where the ingredients have been 'chucked', thrown' or 'dumped'. Why? Why?

to be sick to death of wanky language?!