How did you get a good work / life balance?

[C1239]

Ive decided I need to make some changes to get more of a work life balance and not take work so seriously, I’m mid 40s and still find myself getting stressed about work, please tell me your tips on how to switch off from it if you’ve made to get a good balance?

No one respects the workaholics more, so what's the point? I go home at the end of the working day, that's it until tomorrow.

Hahaha no.

This is ridiculous.

I changed jobs.

I’m self employed. I do a creative professional job. As such I am my companies biggest (only) asset so rest and recuperation and recharging is as important as the nose to the grindstone bit. I can only do good work if I take care of myself so I see time off as an investment in my business.

I work part time but live a simple life. Never been happier.

I took part retirement. The only drawback is that you have to be old to do it.

I completely agree with this, although as part of my getting to this point included changing jobs & taking a significant salary cut as my recent employer (director level role) really and truly acted like they owned me and they'd have never accepted the change in my mindset.

It is also very important to note that you really are only a number at the end of the day as the company will continue without you.

I quit teaching!!

Aside from that, absolutely having proper boundaries. I had really good role models, women in senior six figure positions telling everyone they would not be contactable at weekends/evenings/holidays as they had a life.

The phrase "ah that doesn't work for my diary" has meant that I put all calls/meetings onto two days a week and then have 3 days a week to actually do the work.

Delay send all my emails to ensure I don't end up in email tennis for half the day.

This means I can shut the laptop and relax a bit and it's slowed down the pace of my work a lot.

I went part time and work for a company that doesn't expect overtime except for at very senior grades ( unusual for my industry). Only downside is the pay is less than I could get elsewhere but that's a trade off I'm happy to make.

I dropped a day, and started to do the job I’m paid for, and no more.

That doesn't sound balanced at all!

Dropping a day a week. Gamechanger for my mental health

Meditation
Yoga

If I do an hour’s work a day that no one else can do, then I give myself the rest of the day off.

watch this everyday until it sinks in

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8An2SxNFvmU&pp=ygUPZG8gbm90aGluZyBndXJ1

My mam died very suddenly.. I took a few months off work and... they hired someone to cover me.. all was fine! I'm dispensable!

That has made me feel a lot less "indebted"... so now I do what I need to do, I don't worry about the small things... I still give a lot to my job (I can't not as a teacher!).. but it's ok for me ti go for dinner with a friend on a Tuesday night.. or to have a weekend where I DONT spend all Sunday planning!

The dying never say "I wish I had worked more". Everyone is replaceable- and if you think otherwise, then the job will do you in before retirement.

I wfh ft for a small company that is extremely flexible and generous. As long as the work is done to an excellent standard and I'm available for meetings they don't mind if I run errands during the day. I absolutely love it and not sure if I would ever leave. I could earn more elsewhere but I'd have to commute to the cities and towns and I prefer the slower pace at home.

Cut your hours, I’m like these GP receptionists have it right (20 hours if that) you won’t see them arguing with their bosses over holiday, days off etc.

Hope you have a half competent manager. Half the battle. On a phased return, the boss, of course only to be expected forgot to write my reduced hours for the last Saturday I was doing it, I seriously awoke to a number of calls of concern saying about ‘my lateness’ it actually turned laughable. I sent them the phased return agenda written weeks ago and they still couldn’t accept it. People getting their knickers in a twist over 10 staff when the ‘I remain cool everyone else loses it’ Manager plainly can’t cope with 6…..

I’m trying to work on this too.

Boundaries are important. Also, not striving to ‘overachieve’ - constantly saying yes to additional work (badged as ‘opportunities’) when realistically they don’t really benefit you. Reminding myself I am a salaried employee and I am not responsible for the many and varied organisational failings of my employer. Showing up, undertaking my role to a competent standard, and going home. The people pleaser part of me struggles with that sometimes, and maybe one day I’ll be an ‘overachiever’ again, but right now, I’d rather prioritise other things.

I did CBT and it really helped.

Also got a more flexible and less stressful job!

Lead by example. Don't email others after 5pm or when they are on holidays or at weekends. If you enable it, it will continue.

I close my laptop at 5ish and dont look at it again till the next day or Monday. Very little is that urgent.

As PPs remember everyone is replaceable. Do your work to a good competent level, go the extra mile professionally for colleagues who have your back but forget the rest. Avoid unpaid overtime as far as possible.

take your hours down 10-20% if you are in more than 35 hours

Solid boundaries - take all your holiday allowance, don’t check emails or take calls outside of your hours as far as possible. And do the same for colleagues when they are out of the office. Contribute to a culture where people take rest and have a personal life. Say you have an appointment if someone puts in a meeting at an awkward time.

think regularly about what your next move might be - new role/company/retirement/career change. Plan for it so you are getting the most out of your current role for that step and don’t become institutionalised.

I'll always worry about my work so I work part time with Fridays off. I use Fridays to do a load of chores so weekends can be more relaxed and have time for fun with the family.

Unless you’re literally saving people’s lives (and even then tbh, because you can’t do that if you’re burnt out) this is a really unhealthy attitude. Work will never love you back.

OP you need to set boundaries. No emails or work phone after 6. Say no things outside your remit. Take holiday. Do things you enjoy in your spare time and make time to relax and do nothing too.

Altruism, always for the greater good.
That said. I understand you're perspectives.