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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dd12 Thorpe park without me

48 replies

Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 09:45

Thoughts on this please. Dd and 3 friends 11-12 year olds want to go Thorpe park

arrangements is another mum known to me will drop them
they will go round accompanied by an elder sibling I don’t know but aged 21 and the siblings friends
then another mum will pick up and run them back

I hate Thorpe park anyway as I hate the roller coasters
do I make an excuse? I don’t know the siblings and I’m worried she will fall out a roller coaster
she’s going to hate me but I can’t stop worrying

OP posts:
JMSA · 13/04/2023 09:50

I would jump at this if it saved me having to go. I took my daughter to Alton Towers the other weekend, and would have paid NOT to go on the rollercoasters. Unfortunately my daughter gave me no choice Grin
I think you're being a bit neurotic, sorry.

Clymene · 13/04/2023 09:51

Sounds brilliant.

WhatAmIDoingWrong123 · 13/04/2023 09:52

I can’t believe you’re thinking of trying to stop her. I appreciate you’re anxious, but yeah you’re totally being unreasonable and would rather have her sitting at home than out with her friends. She’s going to start going lots of places without you and you’re going to have to deal with it.

pinkyredrose · 13/04/2023 09:52

Sounds a great idea! She won't fall out! She's in more danger crossing the road!

LeafHunter · 13/04/2023 09:52

It sound great. Get help (or talk to the people helping you) for your anxiety.

FangedFrisbee · 13/04/2023 09:53

When in the uk has anyone ever fallen out of a rollercoaster? You need to chill.

emmathedilemma · 13/04/2023 09:53

Do you really think she'll fall out of a rollercoaster? If so, you need professional help for anxiety.

TheNoodlesIncident · 13/04/2023 09:53

I would let her go with my blessing. She'll have a lovely time and is very unlikely to fall out of a rollercoaster. Your involvement is minimal, I don't know what excuse you could give that doesn't sound like "I don't want my DD to have a lovely time".

user1473878824 · 13/04/2023 09:55

Don’t let your anxiety stifle your daughter’s life OP. Come on. Do you want this to rub off on her?

GoodChat · 13/04/2023 09:55

Let her go. At 11 we'd go to theme parks on school trips and walk around unaccompanied.

FrenchandSaunders · 13/04/2023 09:55

This is the age all this starts, gradually being independent, and this sounds like a fab way to do it, with an older sibling nearby. You need to relax.

MrsSkylerWhite · 13/04/2023 09:57

I was a pretty over cautious parent. This arrangement sounds ideal.

pishkashante · 13/04/2023 09:57

You hating Thorpe Park is irrelevant, your child is not you.

I went to TP many times as a child. The school coach dropped us off and we were then free until pick up time.

Your child is getting a life there and back and will also have a young adult accompanying them! What more do you want?

Your poor dd, you need to loosen the apron strings.

6namechang3 · 13/04/2023 09:59

I googled this fantastic stat -
Deaths on amusement park rides are exceedingly rare. The IAAPA says that the chances of suffering a fatal injury on a ride at fixed-site amusement parks is one in 750 million. Walking downstairs is far more dangerous, let alone going in a car.

JE17 · 13/04/2023 09:59

I would let her go, she’ll have a great time with her friends. My DC have been to theme parks with school at age 11 and been allowed to go around together in small groups.

WheelsUp · 13/04/2023 10:01

I would let her go.
Her journey to school is probably riskier than a rollercoaster

Original poster
Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 10:08

See this is why I posted because I knew I was being stupid!
just googled abs Thorpe park has a really good safety record!
i can’t help having awful thoughts and in my head I just imagine the worst!

OP posts:
Freddiefox · 13/04/2023 10:08

There are loads of children that age there.. they will have a great time.. ds is the same age and has just started going…. he’s not allowed to go to fight night without an adult, so far it’s all been great.

Original poster
Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 10:09

6namechang3 · 13/04/2023 09:59

I googled this fantastic stat -
Deaths on amusement park rides are exceedingly rare. The IAAPA says that the chances of suffering a fatal injury on a ride at fixed-site amusement parks is one in 750 million. Walking downstairs is far more dangerous, let alone going in a car.

Thank you that really helps me

i want her to have fun, I just also want her to be safe.

OP posts:
Original poster
Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 10:09

Am I going to far if I drive up secretly and just wait outside!

OP posts:
timetorefresh · 13/04/2023 10:11

Yes you are. Just let her go. And in the nicest way are you usually this anxious?

VainAbigail · 13/04/2023 10:13

So because YOU “hate” Thorpe Park, your daughter shouldn’t go?? I think you’re projecting here somewhat.

Also, no don’t secretly drive there. That’s daft.

GoodChat · 13/04/2023 10:13

Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 10:09

Am I going to far if I drive up secretly and just wait outside!

Of course you are. You wouldn't be able to do anything in an emergency anyway. You'd just be wasting your day and energy.

IWantToBeACat · 13/04/2023 10:15

Greyhairedlady · 13/04/2023 10:09

Am I going to far if I drive up secretly and just wait outside!

Realistically though, what would that achieve? You being bored rigid / utterly terrified for the day sitting in a car outside the park isn't somehow going to prevent something happening. And if your daughter found out she would be absolutely embarrassed and mortified. Please don't pass on your fears to her. Let her go, tell her what an amazing, fun time she is going to have and then plan the day to distract yourself.

sofapaddling · 13/04/2023 10:17

We used to go on school trips to Alton towers and the teachers would let us run free. She will be fine, she will probably spend more time in queues then on any rides anyway 😃 plus she will appreciate the trust you've given her and there will be a adult around that can contact you anyway.