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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be angry about post c-section pain “relief”?

287 replies

SillySausage81 · 12/04/2023 09:06

Did anyone else find post C-section pain relief woefully inadequate?

I had an emergency caesarean 6 weeks ago and now the dust has started to settle I am starting to feel really bloody angry about the “pain relief” (I feel like it’s a joke even calling it that) I was offered in the first few days.

Paracetamol and ibuprofen. Fucking headache tablets. In the first 3 days I’d describe them as “taking the edge off slightly”. Very slightly. Laying down I was mostly OK, but any attempt at movement caused excruciating agony.

My baby then got taken to the NICU and I couldn’t even go and see her for 18 hours because even just trying to get out of bed and into a wheelchair was unbearable agony. Eventually (after 18 hours and a couple of failed attempts) I made a mammoth effort to push through the pain because I really wanted to see her, and I finally managed to get into a wheelchair and see her (no joke, it took nearly 30 minutes just to stand up and sit in the wheelchair).

I gave birth to my first baby vaginally with just gas and air, and I would describe the pain of trying to get out of bed in the first 2 days after my c-section as being worse than the worst pain I felt during that vaginal birth. Every centimetre I moved felt as though I was being cut open again.

The (slight) effect of the paracetamol and ibuprofen wore off after 4 hours but you can only have it 4 times in every 24 hours, which left long gaps where I didn’t have any pain relief at all.

At some point on the second day I was offered oramorph, but only when I was lying on my back crying from the pain and begging for more pain relief - no one suggested it earlier when I was crying out in pain trying and failing to get out of bed to see my sick baby. But anyway, the oramorph did precisely jack shit anyway, didn’t even take the edge off. The paracetamol was more effective (I have since googled it and apparently I’m far from being the only person who is unaffected by oramorph). When I told the midwives the oramorph wasn’t affecting me they didn’t offer any alternatives, just kept offering more oramorph and telling me it’s supposed to be stronger than paracetamol (well that’s by the by if it doesn’t affect me, isn’t it...)

On top of that, the uterine contractions, stinging from those bloody blood thinning injections, plus twinges from the bloody cannula in my hand only made the already unbearable pain from the wound harder to deal with.

Meanwhile I had the NICU nurse keep on at me that I needed to express milk every 3 hours if I didn’t want my milk to dry up (which I really didn’t want it to as I REALLY wanted to breastfeed) but I was simply in too much pain to do it for the first 42 hours. Thankfully I was able to start on the third day and it didn’t affect my supply, but I could have done without that grief, and actual proper pain relief would have removed that problem.

At the time I didn’t know other painkillers existed, but now I’ve done some reading and spoken to other people and found out there are loads of other options, so I don’t understand why they couldn’t offer me them when what I was getting clearly wasn’t enough.

All I keep reading about is women who say they weren’t in any pain at all and were skipping around Tesco’s after 2 days.

But is there anyone else out there who thinks the pain relief was inadequate?

I’ve heard (conflicting) accounts that they can’t give stronger painkillers to breastfeeding mothers, but that would have been by the by given that, without them, I was unable to visit my baby to breastfeed her OR even express colostrum for her anyway, so if that was their reasoning then it was counterproductive.

OP posts:
Lastnamedidntstick · 12/04/2023 13:53

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at OP's request

The US has a major problem from overprescribing of addictive pain relief. Plus cost issues with private healthcare. You could also argue that healthcare based on your ability to pay/bankruptcy is inhumane, but whole other thread.

what is needed is middle ground. Although I think generally the healthcare profession has an issue with not listening to women. Especially around childbirth. How many of us were told “oh you can’t possibly be in so much pain/near delivery/so far along” or similar?

I repeat though, paracetamol and ibuprofen are not just “headache tablets”. Which is why they are given first as they are safest and most effective, then escalate as necessary.

Saltired · 12/04/2023 14:09

Nicecow · 12/04/2023 12:04

This is why I don't know why people actively choose a C section, it's major surgery! Some people seem to think it's the easier option which is just bizarre

People actively choose it because they make an informed decision and feel it is the best option for their circumstances, same as those who choose vaginal.

Whichnumbers · 12/04/2023 14:11

I’m an Aussie and it sounds like the NHS is a battleground.

maternity, other wards and departments don't seem to gatekeep pain relief in the same way midwifery does

Avocadot0ast · 12/04/2023 14:14

Yep I also didn’t do well post c section with the pain. My husband thinks I did amazingly! I understand he’s trying to be complimentary and is saying he is in awe of how mobile I was once the catheter was out and how the midwives all said I was doing so well.

Well the fact is I was in agony, I had been told if I couldn’t manage my pain well, in other words if I asked for more pain relief then paracetamol and ibuprofen, I’d not be discharged home the next day. I was desperate to get home so put a smile on and said I was fine. I wasn’t fine, and we needed up stuck in for 5 bloody days anyway! I never asked for more pain relief as this idea of showing “weakness” and not managing my pain was stuck in my head.

Honestly that first time I stood up….I thought I would faint. That first walk to use the loo I didn’t know how I’d sit on it or get back up again without ripping myself in half.

I felt like such a failure reading how lots of women are fine and manage so much better post op. I was jealous and in awe of my friends and family who were ok.

The real kicker is I’m unable to have a VBAC with this pregnancy so I’m in on Monday for a c section and I am petrified. However I do know this time I’ll be asking for ALL the safe breastfeeding drugs and I’ve been told that the previous hospital advice about asking for medication was incorrect and this hospital will discharge me 24hrs later (all being well) with pain relief.

But I haven’t stopped crying tbh since we found out it had to be a c section nearly 20 weeks ago and I will not be having any more children after this one as I can’t bare the thought of another c section.

MissyB1 · 12/04/2023 14:28

lipikar · 12/04/2023 09:13

Oramorph is opiate

Yes I know oromorph is opiate, it’s literally liquid morphine. Not every woman is offered that post C section, heck I wasn’t offered morphine after my hysterectomy.

Maria1982 · 12/04/2023 14:35

Capitulatingpanda · 12/04/2023 12:24

I was given codeine after both of mine but second time decided against taking it because it contributed to the traumatic constipation/impaction last time (no lactulose doesn't help). It was v painful moving around for first few days though.

Oh yes. The constipation from dihidrocodeine was horrendous. Compaction here too. Why are there no good painkiller options ???

Capitulatingpanda · 12/04/2023 14:52

@Maria1982 I know, i wish there was a better option. Midwife seemed surprised when I refused codeine and iron but when I told her why she thought it was sensible. That first attempt at a bowel movement after birth is horrendous.

EL8888 · 12/04/2023 14:59

YANBU I had a c section the other day and my experience seems different to yours. There shouldn't in effect a post code lottery for this. I got rectal pain relief after the c section ended (not sure of the name). Then IV paracetamol in recovery. Once l got back to the ward l got paracetamol and ibuprofen offered on rotation. Plus oromorph. Lactulose was regularly offered -100% needed it! I was out of bed within 6 hours for a shower, probably because l was well medicated and my pain under control

I was discharged with Oromorph, ibuprofen and paracetamol. Which l then utilised. Pain is a super personal thing, l feel l have a decent pain threshold but l struggled to do stuff without pain relief in place

As others have said there's a fair amount of judgement and sexism around it. Family member was confused about why l was given oramorph and why l was taking it. They thought it was a bit excessive and not required. Ironically they have an operation planned for later this year, l may have to ask them if they require pain relief afterwards and if they do, comment it "seems excessive". Petty maybe but fair enough

overdogged · 12/04/2023 15:23

I woke up from a coma in hospital, suffering from meningitis around 3 years ago. I was given PARACETAMOL 😩 firstly on a drip then in tablet form. Thanks NHS! Got someone to smuggle me in some nurofen plus to take with it, which took the edge off.

Babyroobs · 12/04/2023 16:12

YunaBalloon · 12/04/2023 11:51

I was the same as you but I still think it's absolutely disgusting that women are denied the pain relief they need.

Yes absolutely. Everyone is different.

megletthesecond · 12/04/2023 16:16

Yanbu. Post CS women are treated appallingly. It's a major op and women should be given strong enough pain relief and support while they rest.

crimsonpeak · 12/04/2023 16:18

Babyboomtastic · 12/04/2023 12:57

No labour pain
More predictable and quick birth
No tearing (which unless i had an epidural I'd feel)
No episiotomy (which unless i had an epidural I'd feel)
No forceps or ventose
Lower risk of incontinence
Much much lower risk of fecal incontinence
My stitches are in a less sensitive area
Getting to meet my baby what not exhausted or in pain

Recovery isn't always painful, let alone agonising. It's certainly not a given that you'll be in any more pain than after a vaginal birth or that your recovery will be any slower. Mine was thankfully incredibly quick, I was out for lunch and wandering round the supermarket pain free on day three.

Obviously this wasn't the case for the OP and everyone's recovery is different, and that's fine. But for many of us, it was a pleasant and relatively pain free way of having a baby.

I wouldn't have had children if I'd been forced into a vaginal birth. Vaginal birth sounds like medieval torture to me personally.

Psychologically I felt so much better after a c section. I felt like I’d been in a car crash after my vaginal birth. It was traumatic.

Caiti19 · 12/04/2023 18:25

I posted earlier regarding my horrendous experience that was very similar to the OPs. I see a lot of comments suggesting it depends on the person. Does it not also depend on the surgeon and the circumstances of surgery? My first was an emergency section - the kind that was based on the blood sample from baby's scalp when I was already 8 cms dilated. I saw real stress on the surgeon's face. Afterwards, I felt like my organs had been rearranged. Like I had been turned to jelly. That was on top of the horrendous unmedicated pain. My second section, on the other hand, was a planned section - it was a dream - totally calm and beautiful - and I was (admittedly very stupidly!) out walking hills 3 days later and never needed more than paracetamol. I think reefing the baby back up the birth canal has to make a difference, and the surgeon being under serious pressure first time around. I just thought it important to dispel the myth that the need for increased pain relief relates exclusively to the person, pain barriers, weakness versus strength etc.

Avocadot0ast · 12/04/2023 18:38

Caiti19 · 12/04/2023 18:25

I posted earlier regarding my horrendous experience that was very similar to the OPs. I see a lot of comments suggesting it depends on the person. Does it not also depend on the surgeon and the circumstances of surgery? My first was an emergency section - the kind that was based on the blood sample from baby's scalp when I was already 8 cms dilated. I saw real stress on the surgeon's face. Afterwards, I felt like my organs had been rearranged. Like I had been turned to jelly. That was on top of the horrendous unmedicated pain. My second section, on the other hand, was a planned section - it was a dream - totally calm and beautiful - and I was (admittedly very stupidly!) out walking hills 3 days later and never needed more than paracetamol. I think reefing the baby back up the birth canal has to make a difference, and the surgeon being under serious pressure first time around. I just thought it important to dispel the myth that the need for increased pain relief relates exclusively to the person, pain barriers, weakness versus strength etc.

My gosh I hope so! My first was an emergency, her head was wedged in my pelvis so she had “impacted fetal head” and the surgeon had to do a T shaped incision down to my cervix lever her back out. I am praying that along with labouring a couple of days before impacted my pain and made recovery harder 🤞🏻🤞🏻 As it means my planned c section on Monday should be an easier recovery.

SamanthaVimes · 12/04/2023 18:41

YANBU it’s fucking appalling how women are treated after a section

Caiti19 · 12/04/2023 18:43

Avocadot0ast · 12/04/2023 18:38

My gosh I hope so! My first was an emergency, her head was wedged in my pelvis so she had “impacted fetal head” and the surgeon had to do a T shaped incision down to my cervix lever her back out. I am praying that along with labouring a couple of days before impacted my pain and made recovery harder 🤞🏻🤞🏻 As it means my planned c section on Monday should be an easier recovery.

I'd put money on it! 💐

Merryoldgoat · 12/04/2023 18:49

I called my GP from my hospital room as I was being discharged and she was furious. She talked to the midwife and suddenly there was a TTO for Diclofenac.

It’s a disgrace.

gotmychristmasmiracle · 12/04/2023 18:50

Yep I agree 😕

CCSS15 · 12/04/2023 18:54

Same here - paracetamol and ibuprofen which didn't even touch the sides. I was sterilised at the same time so don't know if it made it worse but was agony. Was also given bad advice on eating and a nurse told me to eat a biscuit once everything started working again - vomiting hours after being cut open was no joke.

The way mothers are treated is a joke - I too read lots of stories of people skipping round tesco hours after the c section or driving 2 days later, it made me feel terrible as well

lionsleepstonight · 12/04/2023 18:57

I was on a morphine drip for 12 hours after and came home with plenty of pain killers. Can't remember what but I can honestly say I never felt any pain.

TinaTotal · 12/04/2023 19:01

I had a laparoscopic sterilisation a few weeks ago, not comparable to a c section in any way but oh my god was I in pain. Never had so much pain. I asked for pain relief they brought me a cup of mint tea. I shit you not.

BeautyGoesToBenidorm · 12/04/2023 19:23

After my last C-section, the consultant came round and said I'd been prescribed Oramorph if I needed it.

The second night I was in hospital, I bloody needed it. I asked the midwife for it when she came to do my obs, she said "Well let's just see how you do on the paracetamol for now darling."

Patronising cow. She grudgingly came back with Oramorph an hour later. I'd been prescribed the bloody stuff, so what's the problem? No skin off her minge, it wasn't her needing pain relief!

Babyboomtastic · 12/04/2023 19:48

TinaTotal · 12/04/2023 19:01

I had a laparoscopic sterilisation a few weeks ago, not comparable to a c section in any way but oh my god was I in pain. Never had so much pain. I asked for pain relief they brought me a cup of mint tea. I shit you not.

That's not as nuts as you think. Gas pain is really common after abdominal surgery - it's was actually the only pain I had after my c sections (side from mild afterpains).

Peppermint water/tea is really good for resolving it. I drank lots and burped and farted a lot (than goodness for a private room 😂), and within a couple of hours the pain had gone.

Berklilly · 12/04/2023 19:50

YANBU and I'm very sorry for you that your treated this way. I was definitely given codeine for at least 10 days after my C-section...

snuoppp · 12/04/2023 20:05

@SillySausage81 YANBU. It’s disgusting how women are treated.

Imagine a man having abdominal surgery and being offered a paracetamol. I too hard to ask for stringer painkillers and they would leave it over 6 hours before administering the next round of paracetamol- and they wonder why people bring their own tablets in!

Sadly you also get women saying ‘oh it’s not that bad’ etc which defeats the entire point that we shouldn’t have to fight for pain relief if we need it or have our pain measured against another person’s tolerance.