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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why the baby weight won’t budge?

59 replies

Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:03

My baby is 4.5 months old and I’ve been working out since he was 6 weeks old, for the last month I’ve been going hard: PT twice a week, additional Pilates class weekly, 2 x 5k runs a week PLUS walking around 15K steps a day every day. I am combi feeding and aim to eat less than 1500 cals a day of a high protein diet.I am hungry a LOT so I don’t think I’m overeating. And yet… not 1kg lost in all that time. What the HELL is going on? I’ve never struggled to lose weight before and I have at least 1.5 stone to shift (BMI says I am over weight atm for the first time in my life). What am I getting wrong??

OP posts:
Hankunamatata · 07/04/2023 19:06

If your still bf your probably not eating enough calories so your body is holding on to all the fat it can.
Are you measuring yourself as well as weighing?

marshmallowsforbreakfast · 07/04/2023 19:08

If you're breast feeding sometimes people's bodies cling onto the weight as a bit of a reserve. It's a bit of a myth that BF helps you loose the weight.

takealettermsjones · 07/04/2023 19:10

I can't really comment on the weight loss bit but wow, I feel exhausted just reading that. You're only 4.5 months post birth. Your body spent 9 months growing and changing, isn't the general advice that it can take 6-12 months to fully recover?

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:10

Yes! I have lost .5 of an inch from my waist and that is IT! Useless!
I don’t know whether the idea that the body holds onto fat when it doesn’t get enough cals is true as surely then no one would ever get under weight…. Eventually it should shed right?!

OP posts:
Sapphire387 · 07/04/2023 19:12

I struggled to lose weight until I stopped breastfeeding.

Be kind to yourself. There's surely no need to be on such a punishing regime so soon after giving birth?

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/04/2023 19:13

It will come off probably after breastfeeding. You are being incredibly hard on yourself, you have a near newborn, try not to put so much pressure on a number.

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:13

@takealettermsjones im exhausted doing it! Although actually the endorphins do make me feel good and at least I get to see progress in the form of weight lifting and running distance if not how I look… which is something.
id be fine if it took 6-12 months but to see no progress in 2-3 months suggests I will be in the same position a year on!

OP posts:
CatNamedBob · 07/04/2023 19:13

Are you breastfeeding? I don't lose weight at all while bf my body just holds on to it

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:15

@CatNamedBob im combi feeding - probs 2/3 breast vs formula. I thought when I stopped ebf I might see a shift but alas, no

OP posts:
Regularhumanbartenderr · 07/04/2023 19:16

I think you need to take a step back and ask yourself why it’s so important that you lose the weight right now. Nourish yourself and your baby and enjoy your time together - your baby doesn’t give a shit what you look like!

When you stop breastfeeding, or reduce it, and hormones shift, things may change - but at the moment your body has a different purpose.

i was very similar, started running again 5wks pp, tracking calories etc - and I was miserable and nothing shifted. 9 months in and I’m finding it easier to drop a little now but it doesn’t seem as important to me any more. Look after yourself x

Marchforward · 07/04/2023 19:19

You are probably losing fat but building muscle which is why your weight isn’t changing.

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:19

@Regularhumanbartenderr thanks for sharing. I wish I could convince myself it wasn’t important but looking and feeling good, enjoying my nice clothes, feeling confident in my swimmers etc IS important to me. I want to feel like myself. Not least the fact that I am clinically over weight which is objectively not healthy. We lost so much of ourselves to motherhood I’d like to at least look like myself!

OP posts:
Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:20

@Marchforward a girl can dream but the inches on the tape measure suggest not! Sighhh

OP posts:
SnackSizeRaisin · 07/04/2023 19:21

It's far too soon to worry about this. As long as you aren't gaining, just relax. It takes about a year to 2 years to get completely back to normal after birth (and a couple of months after stopping bf as well). You will probably find the weight drops off naturally within the year of you're sensible with food.

It sounds like you're doing far too much to be honest. An hour's brisk walk daily plus a couple of swims or bike rides weekly is plenty, running too soon can lead to prolapse. Have you taken advice from a women's health physio?

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:23

@SnackSizeRaisin my PT is also a women’s health physio and she says it’s all good to run. I had a c section so my nether regions are in good Nick so hopefully risk of prolapse is low

OP posts:
SoggyGround · 07/04/2023 19:23

I'm stumped too! I started reading thinking it will be obvious what this lady is doing 'wrong' but nope, your regime and eating sound fine. Must be the bf and early days post partum.

I understand people saying stop worrying but if this is important to you, then it's important.

CastleTower · 07/04/2023 19:24

There are two kinds of people in the world: people whose weight just falls off when breastfeeding, and people whose bodies hold onto those fat reserves for dear life! I was the latter: the weight came off quickly with no additional diet/exercise when I stopped combi feeding.

It's hormonal, and normal. If exercise makes you feel good, that's great, but there's no need to be dropping weight when you just had a baby. Don't force it if it's not natural for you.

(As regards waist size: my weight went down to a little less than before I first got pregnant, but my waist and rib cage were bigger permanently! Body shape is a funny old thing.)

Regularhumanbartenderr · 07/04/2023 19:25

Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:19

@Regularhumanbartenderr thanks for sharing. I wish I could convince myself it wasn’t important but looking and feeling good, enjoying my nice clothes, feeling confident in my swimmers etc IS important to me. I want to feel like myself. Not least the fact that I am clinically over weight which is objectively not healthy. We lost so much of ourselves to motherhood I’d like to at least look like myself!

I completely agree but whilst your baby is so little, you’re not yourself - your body’s been through a lot and your hormones are all over the place. Exercise and eating well (as in a healthy, varied diet with enough food to sustain your through breastfeeding) will make you feel great - raging hunger will not.
The next few months will fly by and you will start to feel more yourself sooner than you think. Just don’t beat yourself up about it atm, enjoy being the mother of a tiny baby - you have the rest of your life to get yourself back! (And it will happen!)

IAmTheWalrus85 · 07/04/2023 19:26

Another one who couldn’t shed a single pound while breastfeeding. But I lost a stone within weeks of stopping with virtually no effort.

CastleTower · 07/04/2023 19:26

And my hips too, now I think of it. Point is, lots of my nice clothes never fit again, nothing to do with weight or health. Just something to keep in mind.

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:27

Thanks @SoggyGround it’s reassuring to hear that you struggled to shift it even when combi feeding as I did think dropping down bf would make a difference but maybe when I stop completely things will change. Although my hot bod (or lack thereof) is important to me I wouldn’t want to stop bf to hurry it up as I know I can never get that back… so I have a shred of perspective for those on the thread that think I may not 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:28

Thanks @Regularhumanbartenderr 😘

OP posts:
Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:30

@CastleTower thanks for your pov that is helpful and I had been wondering whether it was hormonal as the distribution of weight is different to usual - I’m holding onto it on my hips and waist whereas in my past life it would go straight to the butt. Guess I just need to do what makes me feel good for now and hope it melts away when bf is done

OP posts:
CastleTower · 07/04/2023 19:34

No worries - your body is different for ever, in weird and wonderful ways, and there's no shame in that. I know someone who has ended up a completely different show size!

I'm a strong believer in wearing things that make you feel good now, in the body you're currently in. If you're missing your clothes, could you buy yourself one or two things that are really nice and suit you as you are now? You can always donate/sell them later.

DarlingG · 07/04/2023 19:39

In your head you’ll be thinking 4.5 months is such a long time but a 4.5 month old baby is still so little. You’ve literally just had a baby! You’re trying and sound like you’re doing loads. It will eventually come off the way you’re going. I didn’t really try too hard the first 6 months but between 6-12 months (other than the slightly saggy belly left behind) I managed to end up lower than my pre-baby weight. You will get there!

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