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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why the baby weight won’t budge?

59 replies

Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:03

My baby is 4.5 months old and I’ve been working out since he was 6 weeks old, for the last month I’ve been going hard: PT twice a week, additional Pilates class weekly, 2 x 5k runs a week PLUS walking around 15K steps a day every day. I am combi feeding and aim to eat less than 1500 cals a day of a high protein diet.I am hungry a LOT so I don’t think I’m overeating. And yet… not 1kg lost in all that time. What the HELL is going on? I’ve never struggled to lose weight before and I have at least 1.5 stone to shift (BMI says I am over weight atm for the first time in my life). What am I getting wrong??

OP posts:
Monkeymonkeymoo · 07/04/2023 19:53

I really struggled to lose weight when I was breastfeeding (especially when I was also getting up in the night to pump/feed). I had really bad gestational diabetes and so I needed to lose the weight and get my blood glucose/insulin levels under control.

I found it hard to lose any weight at all even with lots of exercise, a pretty strict low(ish) carb diet and calorie counting (I couldn’t be too restrictive because it effected my milk production).
As soon as I stopped breastfeeding and my son started sleeping through the night (at about 5-6 months) the weight came off pretty quickly and easily.
In the last 5 months I’ve lost 11kg despite doing exactly the same things I was doing before (my BMI has gone from overweight back to the lower end of normal, exactly where I was pre-pregnancy).

Try not to worry about it too much and just enjoy your baby. Things will probably go back to normal once you stop breastfeeding and start getting a bit more sleep!

SnackSizeRaisin · 07/04/2023 19:55

Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:19

@Regularhumanbartenderr thanks for sharing. I wish I could convince myself it wasn’t important but looking and feeling good, enjoying my nice clothes, feeling confident in my swimmers etc IS important to me. I want to feel like myself. Not least the fact that I am clinically over weight which is objectively not healthy. We lost so much of ourselves to motherhood I’d like to at least look like myself!

That's totally fair enough but I think you need to take a long term view and just be a bit patient. A few months is not a lot in the scheme of things. Some people don't gain much weight in pregnancy. Others gain a lot. I gained 3 stone and had lost it all by a year later without making any particular effort other than an active lifestyle. Got pregnant again, gained even more, and again was back to a normal weight by a year later. 4.5 months after the births I was still quite large though.

Mins33 · 07/04/2023 19:56

Not eating enough maybe? I Combi fed and was having 2200 cals, high protein, high step count but v little exercise (just couldn’t fit it in) and lost quite a lot of weight this way. I did drop calories gradually but only to 1700 by 10 months post partum.

RoseValleyRambles · 07/04/2023 19:58

I didn't breastfeed, but it's only 9-10 months in that I'm starting to feel slim again. A bit to go, but it's coming off slowly but surely. Give yourself some more time. I reckon I'll be back to normal by 12 months.

Bobbybobbins · 07/04/2023 19:58

Even when I was only bfeeding at night I didn't lose much weight and my boobs didn't get back to normal size until I completely stopped feeding.

Kentlassie · 07/04/2023 19:59

Are you bf? Despite what people say about it helping with weight loss, I found the weight dropped off after I stopped bf.

WorkingWhileStressed · 07/04/2023 20:04

Norberta · 07/04/2023 19:27

Thanks @SoggyGround it’s reassuring to hear that you struggled to shift it even when combi feeding as I did think dropping down bf would make a difference but maybe when I stop completely things will change. Although my hot bod (or lack thereof) is important to me I wouldn’t want to stop bf to hurry it up as I know I can never get that back… so I have a shred of perspective for those on the thread that think I may not 😂

I also couldn't lose weight when combi feeding. I switched to fully formula at 6 months (not to lose weight, but I bf was difficult - had to use a nipple shield, ds would only be lying down etc, so decided to stop when we introduced solids.)

I would say that it took about a month after stopping any kind of bf until the weight started to shift. I did intermittent fasting from that point too, and it all came off really rapidly. I then caught a few lovely norovirus type bugs once my DS started nursery and now weigh less than before I got pregnant.

OP I would just say try to focus on not gaining any extra while BF, but there's no point attempting to lose weight, and stressing yourself out about it, until you stop bf at the point you planned to stop.

Mutabiliss · 07/04/2023 20:08

4.5 months after a c section is nothing. I still had a much larger womb area than usual at that point - I know that because I wore a pair of jeans to a party and could only just squeeze into them. A few months later with no weight loss and they fit me fine. And the weight of carrying the the baby often affects the pelvic floor, not just giving birth.

I also carried weight completely differently when I was breastfeeding. I have a dress I bought then which just doesn't fit at all now, it's a wildly different shape to my usual figure (but the same size) and I can't quite work out how I ever fit into it.

Just chill. Most women gain weight during pregnancy and take a while to lose it. It's normal, natural, hormonal. Be active, eat well, stop worrying about it. Bodies change.

Janedoelondon · 07/04/2023 20:09

Kentlassie · 07/04/2023 19:59

Are you bf? Despite what people say about it helping with weight loss, I found the weight dropped off after I stopped bf.

Totally second this. I could not shift a pound whilst combination feeding, then dropped half a stone within 2 months of stopping (and periods restarting) without any changes to my diet.

Original poster
Norberta · 07/04/2023 21:20

Thanks everyone it’s been comforting to read all your responses and see it will probably settle back down to somewhere near where I used to be in time. I do have a habit of being impatient so will try to chill a bit more xx

OP posts:
Regularhumanbartenderr · 07/04/2023 21:29

@Norberta i was exactly the same, got really worked up about it not coming off! When I chilled out a bit and put it in perspective it was easier to accept my body would never look the same again (regardless of being at the same weight) but that was fine because look at what it did!

Focus on yourself and your baby, lots of fresh air, exercise and nourishing food. Hopefully you’ll feel much better about yourself and the weight will drop off when your body is ready.

showmethegin · 07/04/2023 22:39

Have you had your thyroid checked? Your thyroid can go haywire after pregnancy and if it is underactive it's practically impossible to lose weight. I was dieting and getting active with no movement on the scales at all. Now I'm medicated with thyroxine the scales have started to move in the right direction

Whatsshecalled · 07/04/2023 22:47

My best friend couldn't work out why she wasn't losing the baby weight....turned out she was pregnant again, her children are VERY close in age. Just a thought.

Peekingovertheparapet · 07/04/2023 22:53

I honestly thought that I would end up the size of a house when both of my babies were small. When I eventually stopped feeding them the fat just melted away. I didn’t lose all that much weight according to the scales and am still a good 5+kg heavier than before I had kids, but my shape returned. It’s just too soon, stop exhausting yourself, if anything you’ll make it worse in the short term.

ladyofshertonabbas · 07/04/2023 23:04

Unscientific, but my body just didn’t seem to be in a weight loss zone for the first year after giving birth. Hormones not normal, breastfeeding etc. Maybe that?

Original poster
Norberta · 08/04/2023 07:35

@showmethegin did you have your thyroid checked on the NHS or did you have to go private?

OP posts:
Favour237 · 08/04/2023 07:40

All the exercising is probably just stopping you gaining weight and keeping you the same! Breastfeeding made me gain and gain for the 6 months I did it, just ravenous all the time. As soon as I stopped as I was ready to feel more like myself, got my willpower back and my fitness - then shed 3 stone in 3 months back to my pre baby weight. It’ll happen when you’re ready to stop, just enjoy it for now!

MaireadMcSweeney · 08/04/2023 07:41

It's breastfeeding and pregnancy hormones. Carry on with the exercise if you enjoy it but don't stress about calories until you stop breastfeeding. I wouldn't expect to lose weight until about 9 months post birth.

USaYwHatNow · 08/04/2023 08:16

You need as an absolute minimum, 1500cals a day to maintain breastfeeding. Possibly your body realises you're in too much of a defecit so holding on to fat?

Isthisexpected · 08/04/2023 08:23

The weight falls off me when I breastfeed. All I can think about is how little time you must spend with your partner is you're exercising so much!

Original poster
Norberta · 08/04/2023 08:36

@Isthisexpected well he’s at work all week so I can’t spend any time with him then! Baby comes with me to the classes during the week when he’s in the office. The runs I do alone but an hours solitude a week is needed I find!

OP posts:
bellac11 · 08/04/2023 08:43

You sound hugely anxious to be carrying a few extra pounds, particuarly in the context that you gave birth very recently

Whats that about?

Original poster
Norberta · 08/04/2023 08:45

@bellac11 I’m just quite vain and want to look nice. Simple as that really- not ready to succumb to a life of frumpery just because I had a baby!

OP posts:
bellac11 · 08/04/2023 08:48

Norberta · 08/04/2023 08:45

@bellac11 I’m just quite vain and want to look nice. Simple as that really- not ready to succumb to a life of frumpery just because I had a baby!

I understand that completely but its so recent, surely you can see that? Like others are saying, give it more time.

BeardieWeirdie · 08/04/2023 08:56

I went from 9 to 10.5 stone with my pregnancies but breastfeeding had the opposite effect - with a 6 week old, I was down to 8.5 stone (and eating 2 dinners). I’d go back up to my normal weight after finishing breastfeeding. I think the previous poster might be correct re being pregnant again (eek).