Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed off with my friends ignorance over anaphylaxis

64 replies

bagpuss90 · 02/04/2023 09:12

My daughter in law has a severe nut allergy . She’s really careful , she was given something at her friends house yesterday which her friend assured her did not contain nuts. My DIL checked the packaging -all good. Anyway she went into severe anaphylactic shock. Administered her Eli pen. Thank god the ambulance arrived really quickly. She’s still in hospital -but she’s okay. It seems it may have been cross contamination -her friend feels awful. But the main thing is she’s okay. I was telling my friend what happened -and she said my DIL needs to pull herself together and get over this nonsense -her words. She has my grandson to think of. She thinks it’s a phobia -ffs.AIBU to be pissed off with her ignorance ?

OP posts:
Original poster
bagpuss90 · 02/04/2023 13:10

Sadly I think the most ignorant are often the most opinionated

OP posts:
CupEmpty · 02/04/2023 13:16

honestly @bagpuss90 thats one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard. Your friend is an idiot.

Bleachmycloths · 02/04/2023 13:57

bagpuss90 · 02/04/2023 13:10

Sadly I think the most ignorant are often the most opinionated

Yep - “empty vessels make most noise.”

thing47 · 02/04/2023 17:19

It's like those who tell people with Type I diabetes that they should eat less sweets or lose weight…

Honestly @bagpuss90 I would struggle to be friends with someone that stupid.

AFlockOfTigers · 02/04/2023 17:29

It's very possible that the increase in levels of serious allergy is partly due to us bringing up our children in cleaner environments, which plays into a reactionary "modern parenting, wrapping kids in cotton wool" narrative.

But that doesn't change the fact that once the child has acquired a serious allergy, whatever the cause, it is a real thing which can really kill them, and frankly anyone who can't get that clear in their head is an idiot.

angelfacecuti75 · 02/07/2023 19:54

"Er no, random friend i dont think so , you cannot pull yourself together with an allergy, she could go into anaphalaxis, where the throat tubes close up and restrict your breathing and kill her. So im afraid u r incorrect it is not something that is willful and not something she can help and it is serious. I am surprised you think this ?!"

neilyoungismyhero · 02/07/2023 19:58

KnittingNeedles · 02/04/2023 09:26

Some people are just thick.

But if your DIL had pre-packaged food which did not have a nut warning or "may contain traces of", and checked herself, what caused the reaction?

Cross contamination was mentioned

PoseyFlump · 02/07/2023 20:01

More zombie threads.

itsmylife7 · 02/07/2023 20:05

Your friend is as thick as mince.... glad your dil is going to be OK.

truthhurts23 · 02/07/2023 20:09

I wouldn’t call that ignorance , more like unintelligence
i don’t know many grown adults who don’t know what anaphylaxis is and if she truly didn’t know, she shouldn’t have such a loud and wrong opinion about it

Individewl · 02/07/2023 20:10

How ignorant of your friend, she definitely needs educating. Maybe explain that even babies can go into anaphylaxis it’s not a phobia, it’s a physical reaction that can be fatal.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 02/07/2023 20:52

KnittingNeedles · 02/04/2023 11:14

Nut allergies - and other severe allergies to be fair - are certainly more common now and I don't think anyone knows why. I was born early 70s, none of my friends or classmates had nut allergies, or had to avoid dairy/gluten. It just wasn't a "thing" and must have made planning kids' parties so much easier for parents. My sister - born mid 70s - had one friend at university who was very allergic to things like peas and lentils.

That's not to say severe allergies don't exist because they clearly do and OP's friend is also clearly a knob. But they are certainly more prevalent. And not helped by all manner of people who decide on a whim that they are allergic, or intolerant to something or other.

That was largely because they'd already died before making it to school. Usually of 'asthma'.

ToWhitToWhoo · 02/07/2023 21:37

One problem here is that the friend is not just lacking in full understanding of severe allergies, which would be serious if she were responsible for providing a meal for the allergic person, but not so much otherwise. But she is also very harsh and self-righteous in a way that would be nasty even if it concerned someone with a phobia. 'Has she thought of seeing a therapist for these panic attacks?'. for example, would be inappropriate and annoying under the circumstances, but well-intentioned. 'DIL needs to pull herself together and get over this nonsense' is just plain mean.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page