To want to move south?

[Oohlalaaaaaa]

Currently live in Central Scotland. My partner is from Dorset. We have primary school aged children with one due to start high school this year. I think we would enjoy a better quality of life down there.
I'm a bit worried my kids would be picked on and not accepted for having scottish accents or for being outsiders. Is this silly? 🤔
Also is it cruel to uproot 3 perfectly happy children, especially one at age 12 (she has strong friendships, the other 2 not so much)? Am I being selfish? I'm scared that if it goes wrong for them it will be my doing. Any advice would be appreciated.

i wouldnt have thought they would be picked on,
their accents would be unique and a story point

What quality of life are you yearning for? Uprooting a preteen is tricky, but doable. It depends on what they will gain from the move, too.

Better weather
Easier access to countryside/coast
Market towns
Where we are is just a bit crap and it's meant to be one of the nicer parts!

Bump

What do the kids think? I moved my teens recently and it was largely fine but I’ve never been part of the brigade that don’t think kids should ever change schools.

it could be an adventure for them.

if you do and hate it and want to move back that’s when you might find that the kids refuse if they are them older teens.

I always say go for it.

I’d move. Dorset is lovely.

I have never seen any unkind behaviour towards Scottish accents in England. We LOVE the Scottish (they just don’t like us so much 🤣).

OP there won’t be any issue with Scottish accents down here. Not like the English accent in Scotland if that is what you are thinking.

Dorset is beautiful, your DC would not get picked on , the south is full of migrated northerners, you would also need to consider the cost of living down here is higher.

I love Dorset but it's not great for teen DC, transport, or future work prospects, and if there's any chance your DC will go to uni, I'd be staying in Scotland for damn sure. As they're happy and settled up there, I'd stick it out and move south when they leave home. There's nothing really to benefit them from a move.

I want to move North but with two teens (13, 14) we won’t move until they’ve finished they’re education as they’re both settled.

If it were me at that age we probably wouldn’t have wanted to have moved (though we liked some places we holidayed in and where we had friends/relatives).

I agree with a PP they probably won’t be teased much for their accents.

Just ensure where you move to there’s lots to do for kids/teenagers (Exmouth where friends moved to from SE London is great eg for water sports for teenagers) and you have transport, but the buses and trains around that area seemed quite good. I’ve got a friend who moved with her teenage DD to Bristol from London (but friend was from SW when younger), her DD went to a private school and Bristol’s very diverse with lots to do.

I know little to nothing about Dorset despite in-laws relatives both being from
there, they both live outside Bath now.

I've not spoken to the kids about it yet. Been fed up of it here for a while but just always pushed it out of my mind. Bit scared on the ensuing histrionics.
I just imagine Sunday roasts, better weather, coast, countryside, prettier towns...just better quality of life. Scotland is great up north but not for me. I used to live in England and I miss it. Yes I always got 'och aye the noo jimmy', comments about free prescriptions bla bla etc which is tedious but overall preferred England. Only moved back up here for family and most of the time they are abroad anyway! I don't feel any deep connection to Scotland. I'm sick of the litter, the parochial Outlook (all you ever hear from the school is tartan, Haggis etc) education is definitely poorer than when I was young. I hate going into the city as its full of drunks and drug addicts. And the countryside in central areas is a bit non existent. You really have to travel further up north for that anyway. I usually take holidays in Lakes, cotswolds, Worcestershire, Northumberland anyway. Maybe I just prefer England.

They will soon pick up the local accent. DH was born in Central Scotland and has lived down south for 40 years and has a Bristolian accent . However as soon as he speaks to family back up there it's as if he never left.

Just a word of warning. Some parts of the south are extremely expensive (Bristol, Bath, the home counties and coastal towns like Poole and Salcombe spring to mind).

Also the drug issues are still as prevalent in all of the places you’ve mentioned.

My English husband has never had 1 word about his accent up here. When I've lived in England it is constant "ooh you're not from round here are you?" Etc. Lol. It's like ye no shit sherlock. Don't think anyone cares up here. We have so many English people in the area of Scotland that I'm in.

I remember Scottish kids moving to my school and being teased til their accents were lost.
might be different now though.

tbh I find your reasons for moving strange. Sunday roasts and countryside - can’t you do that where you are?
whereabouts in central Scotland are you?

Southern England is expensive and overcrowded. Uprooting your entire family because you want a Sunday roast in a market town does seem rather ill-thought out and selfish.

what about friends/family networks, jobs/finances, children’s friends and academic attainment/support? What kind of property could you afford? What schools would they have access to?

it sounds like you need to do some pragmatic investigations rather than romantic daydreaming

I live in Dorset. Accents absolutely aren't an issue, there's quite a few Eastern Europeans in all the schools so kids are more than used to accents.

Pressed send too soon.

Lovely place to live, very expensive though compared to Scotland!

That’s not borne out by the stats …

Im a south coast dweller and I'd move for your reasons down here!!

It’s a better place for women, at least under the present government ( cowers in bomb shelter.) At least in England we still have a vague glimmer of what a woman is, and some effort to ensure their dignity and safety.

And the ones which are not expensive have the drunks and drug addicts, loads of people are sent down the coast for rehab.
Saying that, I lived in Hastings for 10 years, it has a bad reputation but it’s a cool
town, loads happening for the kids, it’s cheaper because it’s a poor area, the old town is great for a night out for young and old.

Dorset is very expensive and there are few opportunities for teenagers/young adults who are priced out of the area due to incomers from London and the exceptionally low wages compared to house prices so money doesn’t go far.

Bournemouth and Poole are horrible and run down these days and quite crime ridden. Yes the beaches and forest are nice if you can get to them/park in the summer! As public transport is very hit and miss (many places not on train lines and limited bus services apart from main towns)

Winter is nicer traffic wise. Also not sure what weather you are getting up there but it rained nearly every single day in December, January and March…