Imagine you run a fleet of taxis in a city called Ofstopolis.
In Ofstopolis, the rules are that MOTs are carried out by a group of Ofstopolis inspectors, without warning, on a random basis, and your taxi firm will get a grade, based on these random MOTs, which will be:
Green - ( you can carry on trading)
Amber - ( you need to make changes immediately to carry on trading)
or Red ( you lose your job and your livelihood and are banned from driving a taxi/ owning a business indefinitely)
You were last inspected 2 years ago, and got graded Green, but you are now approaching that time frame where you know that the Ofstopolis inspectors are going to descend again at some point, and MOT all your taxis.
You keep abreast with all current guidance on how to pass an MOT inspection.
Over the next 5 years, you do not get an MOT inspection, but following the guidance in order to be ready for the MOTs, you do the following:
Paint all the cars red as Ofstopolis inspectors are saying this is the safest way for children to notice cars and not get run over
Paint all the cars green, as another but of research a few months later now says red cars have more accidents
Move all the steering wheels to the left hand drive in preparation for a change of side of road you drive on. Then move them back as that plan is abandoned.
Make sure all drivers have photo ID with their name on, showing at all times
Make sure no driver has their surname showing, as this is now considered a data breach
Make sure every driver is trained never to say anyone else's name
Make sure every driver has the latest insurance documents to hand in their car.
Make sure every driver stops carrying around insurance documents, and instead copies the relevant details into a notebook kept securely in a locked glove compartment
Change every driver to a different insurance company which is currently in favour
change all the tyres to blue tyres forgotten why, but Ofstopolis inspectors are currently insisting on this
Change all tyres to green tyres...err...
Change specification of lock on glove compartment...
make sure all drivers are trained in mindfulness
Make sure all drivers carry proof they are trained in mindfulness
Make sure all drivers are change the proof they are carrying, that they are trained in mindfulness, to a certificate exactly 154 mm square, no more, no less, change the size of all glove compartments to fit this exact certificate, take previous lock off glove compartment and fix it to a strong box in the boot to keep the (recently changed again) insurance documents in there, add a lock of a different specification to the glove box to keep the mindfulness certificate in, change the tyres to yellow, and the windscreen wipers to pink
And a thousand thousand other details of procedure, or whims based on highly suspect research, or politically motivated directives
NONE OF WHICH HAVE ANY BEARING AT ALL ON DRIVING YOUR CUSTOMERS
ALL OF WHICH IMPEDES YOU IN YOUR DAILY TASK OF DRIVING CUSTOMERS
Finally the day arrives and the Ofstopolis inspector descend.
YOu are bumped down from green to red, because a driver is found to have a mindfulness certificate which Is the correct size, and IS kept in the correct size glovebox, and DOES have the correct specification of lock on it.. BUT
he had his surname on it, which is a safeguarding breach, as surnames are not allowed - and he had mistakenly thought that the mindfulness certificates were supposed to have surnames on, to prove who had been trained, so this is a management failure, as the correct procedure had not been explained to the driver, and noone had checked it was being followed.
(And my most recent experience of ofsted, a few months ago, I was reprimanded because a student handed in an exercise book with their surname one)
And I hope this explains why teachers feel ofsted has a hugely negative effect on education