To try and give an Ofsted analogy, to help people understand better

[Nimbostratus100]

Imagine you run a fleet of taxis in a city called Ofstopolis.

In Ofstopolis, the rules are that MOTs are carried out by a group of Ofstopolis inspectors, without warning, on a random basis, and your taxi firm will get a grade, based on these random MOTs, which will be:

Green - ( you can carry on trading)

Amber - ( you need to make changes immediately to carry on trading)
or Red ( you lose your job and your livelihood and are banned from driving a taxi/ owning a business indefinitely)

You were last inspected 2 years ago, and got graded Green, but you are now approaching that time frame where you know that the Ofstopolis inspectors are going to descend again at some point, and MOT all your taxis.

You keep abreast with all current guidance on how to pass an MOT inspection.

Over the next 5 years, you do not get an MOT inspection, but following the guidance in order to be ready for the MOTs, you do the following:

Paint all the cars red as Ofstopolis inspectors are saying this is the safest way for children to notice cars and not get run over

Paint all the cars green, as another but of research a few months later now says red cars have more accidents

Move all the steering wheels to the left hand drive in preparation for a change of side of road you drive on. Then move them back as that plan is abandoned.

Make sure all drivers have photo ID with their name on, showing at all times

Make sure no driver has their surname showing, as this is now considered a data breach

Make sure every driver is trained never to say anyone else's name

Make sure every driver has the latest insurance documents to hand in their car.

Make sure every driver stops carrying around insurance documents, and instead copies the relevant details into a notebook kept securely in a locked glove compartment

Change every driver to a different insurance company which is currently in favour

change all the tyres to blue tyres forgotten why, but Ofstopolis inspectors are currently insisting on this

Change all tyres to green tyres...err...

Change specification of lock on glove compartment...

make sure all drivers are trained in mindfulness

Make sure all drivers carry proof they are trained in mindfulness

Make sure all drivers are change the proof they are carrying, that they are trained in mindfulness, to a certificate exactly 154 mm square, no more, no less, change the size of all glove compartments to fit this exact certificate, take previous lock off glove compartment and fix it to a strong box in the boot to keep the (recently changed again) insurance documents in there, add a lock of a different specification to the glove box to keep the mindfulness certificate in, change the tyres to yellow, and the windscreen wipers to pink

And a thousand thousand other details of procedure, or whims based on highly suspect research, or politically motivated directives

NONE OF WHICH HAVE ANY BEARING AT ALL ON DRIVING YOUR CUSTOMERS

ALL OF WHICH IMPEDES YOU IN YOUR DAILY TASK OF DRIVING CUSTOMERS

Finally the day arrives and the Ofstopolis inspector descend.

YOu are bumped down from green to red, because a driver is found to have a mindfulness certificate which Is the correct size, and IS kept in the correct size glovebox, and DOES have the correct specification of lock on it.. BUT

he had his surname on it, which is a safeguarding breach, as surnames are not allowed - and he had mistakenly thought that the mindfulness certificates were supposed to have surnames on, to prove who had been trained, so this is a management failure, as the correct procedure had not been explained to the driver, and noone had checked it was being followed.

(And my most recent experience of ofsted, a few months ago, I was reprimanded because a student handed in an exercise book with their surname one)

And I hope this explains why teachers feel ofsted has a hugely negative effect on education

You're head housewife with apparent autonomy to run your household. The buck stops with you and you make all the decisions including financial, although there's never quite enough money to do everything you'd like.

Your bedrooms are immaculate with bedding changed daily
Ditto bathrooms colour matched towels are neatly folded after their daily wash
Downstairs is always visitor ready with a warm welcome
Mostly the family is served home cooked good nutritious meals but occasionally you let everyone down by doing something quick and easy
Your garden's a bit of a mess, but no one ever uses it, it makes no real difference to anyone.

The overwhelming judgement of your ability and management is superb, but because you failed on the garden, the one judgement laid down will be requires improvement. No one will even notice the beautiful bathrooms.

As a result you'll likely have to leave your home and all the good work you've done there for so many years

I want a school inspection to tell me the good and bad points of a school, including information that explains results. So for instance, if they take a lot of below average (academically) children in year 7 and get them passing however many GCSEs, that'd be a win. Similarly, if they have a lot of deprived kids or EAL kids and get them up to pass standards, that's good too.

If they have a lot of above average kids and they leave average, that's not good.

I have kids in outstanding schools (secondary last inspected in 2018, but the primary was about 2008) and they are definitely outstanding. OFSTED could go in tomorrow and say they're crap and I wouldn't take the blindest bit of notice because I KNOW they are great schools, with great discipline and results.

I'm in a role that gets inspected regularly, but we get scored in several areas and given things to improve. We don't get an overall poor grade because one of a number of if issues wasn't right. There may well be disciplinary action if we everything was terrible, but notmfor one thing when everything else is basically good.

I quite enjoy being audited. It's useful to know where you could improve and where support is needed. That's how it should be.

I want a school inspection to tell me the good and bad points of a school, including information that explains results. So for instance, if they take a lot of below average (academically) children in year 7 and get them passing however many GCSEs

Progress 8 tells you have every child does. The A-C is no longer important. It's everyone's progress that matters.

@coffeeandeav but surely the A-C matters?

It does to me anyway, what's the point in going to school if the kids aren't passing exams at the end of it?

It matters for the children of course but progress 8 allows it to matter for everyone. Not everyone can pass an exam but everyone can make so progress.

@coffeeandeav I have no problem with that. Am I right in assuming that both matter to OFSTED? So the progress and pass rates? Or are they now just looking at progress rates?

The world changes every day. I don't know anyone would expect it to be any different. In private business firms that don't keep up, don't carry out stringent market intelligence, and are not prepared to pivot at the drop of the hat to keep pace with changes, tend to go out of business very quickly. Teachers don't have to worry about that, they get paid regardless, so they tend to get complacent.

No system of auditing is perfect, and there's always going to be some element of "teaching to the test", but there has to be checks and guidelines, because when teachers aren't doing their job properly, it often isn't something that is obvious straight away, but a few years later when the pupils are leaving school uneducated and unable to cope with the working world and adult responsibilities.

Spot on OP!

All that data is available without Ofsted.

Nearly all the major issues in schools right now are caused by lack of funding and (related) lack of teachers + problems with other services and schools having to pick up the pieces.

If we funded schools properly, and schools were supported to do the best job they could then that would be far better for everyone than punitive inspections which have the potential to really, seriously damage schools.

You say your child's primary is outstanding, and the judgement wouldn't make a difference- but here is the thing. It could, it probably would.

If the school got an inadequate judgement tomorrow (say, they've messed up their safeguarding record keeping) , it's very likely the head would be asked to leave by the MAT/governors. The school would have to join a MAT if it's not part of one, or might be rebrokered into a new one- this can cause significant changes.

A new head comes in, keen to make their mark- they chuck out all the bits of the school you like, the bits that are working well as well as the bits where issues were identified. It's unsettling for the kids so behaviour gets worse.

The teachers who can (likely the best teachers or those with shortage skills) start to leave. Teachers tend not to want to work at an inadequate school, so it's hard to replace them. Classes end up being taught by TAs and long term supply, so the students fall behind. Then the teacher next year gets put under even more pressure to catch them up- and perhaps that teacher goes off with stress...

The school can end up in a really negative spiral that it can take years to get out of/bounce back from. In that time, it loses students, loses funding, which means it's even harder for the school to improve. The days when inadequate schools got loads of money given to them are long gone.

Sometimes, a judgement can take a school that was serving the community well, albeit with some issues, and put it on a negative track which damages everyone.

secondary, yes, no surnames visible in the classroom, and nothing I take home can have a surname on, I was told. We had already got wind of this, and gone round with a thick black pen obliterating all surnames on work on the wall, now we were told surnames have to come off all exercise books and not be written into teachers planners, either

@Postapocalypticcowgirl I'm not sure the head would be asked to leave at the primary tbh. The head is longstanding and the governors are supportive too.

But perhaps the head would be asked to leave. If that was the case then yes, I'd remove my kids because I know the current head would be the best person to get the school out of the predicament.

We haven't looked at the inspectors' valuable experience in the matter.

1. Last worked for a taxi firm when they were called Hansoms and still daydreams about the glory days, so fails any firms who fail to carry a bale of hay for the horse in their boot.
2. Drove high spec limousines for visiting foreign dignitaries and members of the Royal Family whilst escorted by a team of Close Protection Officers and 18 motorcyle outriders, so has absolutely no truck with suggestions that the driving time from north of the Town Centre to the eight primary schools in a five street radius of the southern five road junction and on the single bus route for 7 separate services that goes through a section of roadworks that take the carriageway down to 8 foot wide could possibly take more than 6 minutes and 17 seconds at 8.35amon a rainy February morning.
3. Will go on from their illustrious career as Inspector to preside over a taxi firm that, in one year, has 381 separate serious untoward incidents, despite scrapping every one of the vehicles that had rainspots on the bonnet for making the place look messy, culminating in an explosion that demolishes three sheds and the staff toilets.

Also easier than an FSA (food) inspection - people have no idea

A Deputy Head teacher I know was quite pleased after the post-inspection debrief with the inspectors, they had picked up on a couple of things that the school was aware of and were in the process of addressing. When the report was published it was totally different, the school was given the second lowest grading and many things were criticised that had been said to be satisfactory in the de-brief. Schools are not allowed to comment on the report to parents nor will Ofsted look at the school's evidence. Any Headteacher should ensure that the debrief is recorded and be allowed to defennnd themselves.

but you are talking about a private business making changes relevant to the business, and based on information.

Teachers are in the business of education, and constantly "pivot at the drop of a hat" "keep pace with changes" pertaining to our students, who we are in the business of eduating.

Everything I have tried to explain about ofsted is that they IMPEDE education, and are EXTRA on top of education, and are largely irrelevant to education.

So we are doing all the same changing and updating and responding as your business, but then double that, on top for no reasons

this sounds awful too

I was criticised years ago during an Ofsted inspection for not conducting a lesson on ‘The Canterbury Tales’ entirely in Middle English…

Nearly a decade ago, I went on maternity leave. I worked in quite a prestigious school. We struggled to find suitable maternity cover, but finally found a teacher who had previously been a Deputy Head, but wanted to get back into classroom teaching. I was a pretty organised teacher and gave her all of my fully-resourced schemes of work and talked her through my classes. She had little-to-no planning to do, and my classes were quite lovely cohorts.

Halfway through my maternity leave, the Head sacked her. This was unheard of in the school, but when I picked up some of the classes after my maternity (the remainder of which had been covered my a string of short-term supply), I could see why. I had to redo all coursework and teach the exam syllabuses in one year. The classes had done nothing. Apparently, they’d sat around playing cards whilst the maternity cover teacher chatted with them. My lessons, she said, were too complicated for her.

A year later, said teacher became an Ofsted Inspector.

it sounds very difficult 💐

I'm a teacher so only have experience of Ofsted. Reading this thread, I think there were posters in at least 5 other sectors with similar inspection regimes.

It sounds as if there needs to be a radical overhaul of the whole inspection culture in this country.

There obviously needs to be some kind of oversight when failings have an impact on customers'/clients'/students'/residents'/prisoners' physical and mental health and wellbeing.

But every one of the inspection systems described seems to involve stress for those inspected; a lack of trust in people's professionalism; insistence on complying with over prescriptive and unnecessary paperwork; a one size fits all approach; overall grades which don't reflect the bigger picture and, above all, a total lack of support and aftercare if weaknesses are found to exist.

I have been teaching for 30 years and have only experienced Ofsted (multiple inspections, great changes in how these are done).

I've read a couple of Gervase Phinn's books, including descriptions of his time as a County Inspector, regularly dropping in on schools which he knew well. So different from what happens now.

Very clever and amusing OP.
The problem stems from when the UK decided to abandon generally accepted morals. Could have been the 50s, 60s, or 80s, but I would punt on 1997.

Sounds like MHRA /FDA audit or any regulatory body. Always bloody stressful and I do wonder how these people get their jobs. I always love the extra paperwork that doesn’t impact my day job but has to be done for audit purposes.