To ask about lying about cancer ?

[Cinderellaspumpkin]

I know someone, who's behaviour appears to be very "unusual."

She's recently told myself and several others she's receiving chemotherapy for cancer , ( she's 40, has three young boys). Obviously we were all incredibly sympathetic.

However she's openly ( on Facebook) , going drinking , holidays, ( albeit UK. based holidays), nights out and days out with the kids , photos doing shots on nights out, all mid-cycle.

E.g she will post a status on a Wednesday that she has chemotherapy and then two days later, on Friday, be posting pictures of herself taking shots on a night out .

Her hair hasn't fallen out and she hasn't lost weight, but I know that doesn't always happen with chemotherapy.

However I remember when my mum had chemotherapy, ( and ultimately my mum survived cancer) , she didn't have the energy to go shopping, let alone nights out, mid cycle.

There's something that smells very "off" about this , ( and a long history of attention seeking behaviour), but AIBU to wonder if there's something odd going on ?

I would be less worried about her diagnosis and more concerned that she might use it to defraud your Aunt out of more money. How old is your Aunt ?

Aunt is a great aunt. She's 76.

It costs more than £200 to cremate a pet which is why I made my DH dig a giant hole in the garden instead.

I know someone who has brain cancer and is having chemo via tablets. He is very knocked out by it and tends to sleep alot. Once the course he is on is over he bounces back quite quickly. He doesn't drink alcohol because he was advised not to, but I suppose he could have ignored the advice. He hasn't lost his hair at all. He does have to avoid catching any viruses and takes moderate measures to avoid crowds of people. 100% sure it is genuine.

In the case of your friend op, it could be entirely possible that she does have cancer and is on medication. Not enough evidence to suggest otherwise.

@Cinderellaspumpkin

If she does have cervical cancer then the chemo used to treat that doesn't make you loose your hair unless it's late stage.

However she would be having daily radiotherapy appointments.

Or she'd have a hysterectomy.

Source: Finished treatment myself in October.

She sounds like she's making it up to be honest.

Just because she's (most likely!) lied re cat doesn't mean she doesn't have cancer...

Also people who have pretended to have cancer DO sometimes get it!

But... Id be very worried re her exploitation of your aunt...

Id be tempted to discover her full name /dob and have a chat to action fraud /cops/age concern...

Sometimes the only time when these frauds come to light is when multiple unrelated people report 'concerns'.

PS years ago (about 15/20)a friend paid 600£ for cat cremation

I worked with someone who lied about having chemo. Said that was why she was ill in the mornings. Turned out the chemo was booze. She lied about a lot of things...

£200 is a reasonable amount for a cremation. It only takes a second to google it.

My friend has cervical cancer and she hasn't lost her hair. She's also not posting pictures of her clubbing but she's in her late 40s and would not be doing that anyway.

sadly, happen to know ( through a good friend) that £200 is the exact local cost of a cat cremation

I think if you are questioning it you already know the answer. You don't always lose your hair. However when I had chemo I was incredibly tired. I hardly ate as it does affect your taste buds I was also told not drink. Others I know on chemo were the same.some put weight on some lost it. As for holidays I wasn't allowed to fly abroad and definitely no holiday insurance company would insure you. As sad as it sounds there are people who will fake cancer. I don't know anyone who's gone out drinking and doing shots while on chemo.

@Gameofhomes the threads 9 months old.....

I thought that
she wouldn’t be posting those things

The test will be whether your aunt will be asked to give her money during her "treatment".

I know someone who faked terminal cancer for years. Everyone thought it was suspicious but felt too bitchy to say it out loud. Every few months she’d say it had spread somewhere new, but she was still taking part in sports and going out. She ended up being sent to prison after conning an elderly neighbour out of her life savings, for “treatment”. Absolutely despicable behaviour but she’s obviously got a screw loose. Her own daughter believed her mum was dying for years. How could someone do that to their loved ones? I also don’t believe that she pulled the wool over her DH’s eyes, though he says she did. All those ‘hospital appointments’ and ‘operations’ and he never knew?

ZOMBIE THREAD

Sorry but to the poster who said 'karma bit her on the bum, because her Mum died from bowel cancer!". That is absolutely disgusting and you should be ashamed to say such a thing.

I once worked with a woman who lied about having cancer. Everyone was doing collections etc. She ended up getting fired when they found out. Very odd.

It's a very serious accusation though so don't say anything unless you're sure.

@Kedece2410 I'm aware

Someone I knew lied about having stage 4 cancer - she was a very troubled young woman.

Zombie thread

This is a difficult one my mum had chemo when I was 12 and it was through a hickman line and continuous so carried on as normal. I've had to stop my chemo after 2 cycles because it made me so ill I had a servere toxicity. Every symtom and side effect you could get Ive had and even after stopping it 4 weeks ago I still have them. I am just slowly starting to turn the corner, I have a toddler and we've had to put her in full time nursery so she's not stuck at home with me as I just couldn't manage her. I'll not go into too much detail but I still crawl up the stairs, I could sleep forever and still be tired, I sit on a chair to cook meals, I take more baths so I can sit down and my poor husband washes my hair. He picks up the slack bless him. My friends take me out for coffee etc and I do try and get out, but it's hard i no energy, i have sick bowls everywhere including the car! But our running joke at the minute is I've not been sick in a week and not been admitted to hospital for 10 days 🙌😂 and ive lost so much weight all my old levis that i kept incase i got fit etc are now too big (lost 13kgs in 4 week).

But on saying that when I was going to the day unit I was talking to a gentleman who was finishing his last cycle. He was on the same type of chemo as me and he didn't have one side effect. I was so jealous 🙄😁. So it's hard but some people are just lucky. You could quiz her and ask questions when's your next oncology appointment etc or scan have you seen your Macmillan nurse etc. Want me to come with you ?

My dad is very odd but he likes sympathy and so at the minute I tell him the minimum because he uses what I'm going through and makes it all about him. Eg poor dad his wife died of cancer and now his daughter has the same etc he's really going through it. I suppose what I'm saying is people are strange and just because you wouldn't do it doesn't mean that they wouldn't.

Sorry for long reply x