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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Inappropriate contact from British Gas engineer?!!

426 replies

PandaEyed13 · 21/03/2023 11:31

Bit of a weird one!

Has anyone had a gas/electric engineer respond to a call out at their property - and then had the engineer call and text their personal mobile number weeks after the work?!

Had a problem with my gas meter at my house last month and British Gas sent multiple engineers on varying dates to try and fix the issue, 4 engineers in total on 4 separate dates over the past few weeks, the issue got fixed and resolved last week, job done, lovely stuff!

Over this past weekend though I had 2 missed calls from a mobile phone number I didn't recognise. I didn't answer because it's just my personal philosophy not to answer to unfamiliar numbers, I assumed they were cold calls and forgot about it.

Yesterday morning though, I got 2 more calls from this number. Then a text - "Hi there B, (not my real name) it's 'Dan' (not his real name) from British Gas, call me back..'

Erm...that's weird right?
So when I cast my mind back, 'Dan' was engineer number 2 from visit number 2 about 3 weeks ago!

I can remember him being very friendly, really helpful - to the point of being almost above and beyond. He didn't cross any boundaries on the day. He was a teeny tiny bit vibey, like the absolute smidgen of a flirt, but not in a way that made me uncomfortable, he was just treating me a bit 'damsel in distressy,' which I didnt think much of at the time, I just wanted the work done! He even offered to call my DH for me at his work and explain what work he was doing at the house so I didn't have to bother trying to suss out the jargon to relay back to him. I said no thanks, but me being married became known information!

Fast forward 3 weeks and he's called my personal mobile number from his 4 times and sent a text asking me to call him. This is weird, yes? Boundary crossing? Call-out engineers never do follow up calls right? None of the other 3 engineers who came to my house have contacted me! I called my mum right after and DH on his work break and both freaked out, like "what if he's a nutter, he knows where you live!" etc etc.

My mum advised to reply to his text saying "no thanks, I won't be calling as the work has been completed at our property now, but thanks for your help on the day" and then to block his number if he replies to that or calls again. So I sent that text this morning and no reply as of yet. DH wants his number to call him though and ask what the F he wants! I spoke to British Gas this morning and they said it's not commonplace for call-out engineers to make contact with residents of properties they have attended or to make follow up calls and do I want to start an investigation. I said I didn't know because I haven't heard anything else since I sent my "thanks but no thanks" message a few hours ago, so they said call back if I get anything else.

I don't want to get anyone in trouble if it's all innocent, or antagonise anyone if it's not!

And DH is chomping at the bit for me to pass his number on so he can ring him, which I'm also reluctant to do?

Ideas, opinions? Anyone else had the 'friendly engineer' hit them up? I tried to Google whether engineers do this and there's absolutely nothing, so I'm thinking - no, they don't! Even if he is just following up on the day, it's still inappropriate and boundary crossing right? How he got my mobile num, I don't even know, he's a call-out engineer not a call centre agent with account access!

Didn't know where else to post this so went with AIBU, although I don't think I am to be freaked out!

OP posts:
Hellybelly84 · 21/03/2023 15:57

I would get your Husband to call, find out what he wants and then block his number. Cant think of any reason why he would need to contact you so seems very unprofessional and would report it if theres no genuine reason for him contacting you.

CustardySergeant · 21/03/2023 15:58

ClawedButler "The thing that bothers me most about this is that BG say they have no record of him being at your house. The second most bothersome bit is him hanging up on your husband."

Exactly. If there's no record of his visit, will he even be paid for the work? Why did he fail to record his visit?

MetalFences · 21/03/2023 15:59

Any sensible person would have just rung the guy back to find out what he wanted.

You should go to the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too.

TomatoesAndPeaches · 21/03/2023 15:59

I texted two BG engineers who have been to my house recently who rang me when they were on there way
To be fair, it was about the job.
But they didnt reply back anyway 😂😂😂

CustardySergeant · 21/03/2023 15:59

Hellybelly84 · 21/03/2023 15:57

I would get your Husband to call, find out what he wants and then block his number. Cant think of any reason why he would need to contact you so seems very unprofessional and would report it if theres no genuine reason for him contacting you.

Her husband did call and the man hung up on him!

Hardly anyone is bothering to RTFT!

GreenGarnet · 21/03/2023 16:01

Floordilemma · 21/03/2023 15:17

I can't believe people think you're being unreasonable.
Not recording his visit and then multiple attempts to contact you, hanging up on your husband. You've done the right thing.
He's in a position where he's not exactly a stranger and has been in your house before, so your guard might be down. But no one would have known he'd been there.

I agree. This is the most sinister part of it all, IMHO.

Frabbits · 21/03/2023 16:04

Starlight2021 · 21/03/2023 15:55

OP please do not explain yourself to the absolute cock merchants who say you are being a drama queen.
Too many women have been hurt and killed because they think “am I being dramatic” in potentially dangerous situations. You did the right thing by calling his employers.
If anyone is reading this reply and disagreeing, then my friend you are the cock merchant I refer to and I will delight in ignoring your response because it honestly doesn’t mean a thing when it comes to safety so you can respectfully pop the f&ck off

I'm sorry, but no.

How many people have been hurt and killed because they simply returned a voicemail from someone, and thus were able to make an informed decision about whether the guy was being unprofessional or was simply following up to check on something?

TomatoesAndPeaches · 21/03/2023 16:04

Strange there is no record of attendance ..
Did you get a text / Email / Phone call from BG about the appointment before he arrived?

I once had BG arrive and i wasnt expecting them
My uncle was here, so no risk of ‘something bad happening’ but i still didnt let him in

Frabbits · 21/03/2023 16:04

MetalFences · 21/03/2023 15:59

Any sensible person would have just rung the guy back to find out what he wanted.

You should go to the Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Who Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too.

Oh how witty.

DashboardConfessional · 21/03/2023 16:07

I am aghast that people think this this might be innocent. Particularly after he hung up on OP's husband. There is not one single plausible reason for him to have done that and then continue to call the OP's mobile number.

Starlight2021 · 21/03/2023 16:09

Frabbits · 21/03/2023 16:04

I'm sorry, but no.

How many people have been hurt and killed because they simply returned a voicemail from someone, and thus were able to make an informed decision about whether the guy was being unprofessional or was simply following up to check on something?

Show quote history

I know, I know I promised no response but I couldn’t leave your lovely apology unanswered

Apology accepted and recorded my sweet, much appreciated

Snowglobed · 21/03/2023 16:11

I've had this before with a different company, I phoned the company on their customer service line and said I'd been asked to contact- they then said no nothing on your account how did we notify you and I said I had a text from x number from y employee. They said they shouldn't contact directly and that they'd log it and I should block the number- which I did. Honestly yes it's inappropriate, if you're uncomfortable even if it was for something genuine then just phone the company.

Frabbits · 21/03/2023 16:13

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

longtompot · 21/03/2023 16:17

I really wish there was a big stamp mumsnet could stamp on some posts saying Read The Thread!

How many times have we been told to trust your instincts? Ops trusted hers.

IF this engineer was genuine he would have said I've left a tool, I forgot to get you to sign off, whatever other reason people have put on this thread as to why he is calling and texting the op.
IF this engineer was genuine, then he would have spoken to ops husband when he phoned him and not hung up.

I hope you get some answers @PandaEyed13 and I'm so sorry to read of yours and your friends experience when you were younger💐

Tropicaliyes · 21/03/2023 16:17

@Pudmyboy apologies I saw your response a bit late🤦🏽‍♀️. I think when someone writes a post and they are questioning their reasoning when you yourself wouldn’t question the situation, it’s always best to assume there is a reason behind it not seeming right to the poster.. Thing is many people don’t bother think before posting or they straight up couldn’t care less.

I didn’t exactly get support, just had to get on with life as I was still here to tell the tale. Growing up my mother basically taught me to just get use to being treated differently to others simply because of my features and being viewed differently. I always knew not to bother even bring any issues back to her as she would give some mumsnet response like “you just allowed it by not even trying to fight back” or “hope you got what you was after” or something similar! Baring in mind she taught me to just put up with it… not fight back!

The fact the OP contacted her mum then husband before just reacting to the guy I think was wise as she could have messaged/called back or not been so cautious and then for something to happen and people then say “why didn’t you ask a second opinion before you responded” “or why would you bother even get back to a complete stranger” or the complete opposite to what is being out here now so she would have been doomed if she did, doomed if she didnt.

DashboardConfessional · 21/03/2023 16:18

It's not about "How many people returned a voicemail and got murdered." It's about "How many women gave the tiniest sliver of attention to some deluded bloke who then latched on for dear life."

Frabbits · 21/03/2023 16:21

The point being, that if OP called back she'd then know whether the engineer was being inappropriate or if it was innocuous, and if it was all this angst could be avoided. If it wasn't, she then had real cause to complain.

Calling back doesn't put her in any more danger than she was to start with, if the guy was going to cause her grief.

MissMissive · 21/03/2023 16:22

Margot78 · 21/03/2023 12:27

Four different engineers to fix one meter?

I think you’re missing the point, Margot ☺️

AIBUNoNo · 21/03/2023 16:22

I see your point but I also think that an adult, you should be able to deal with unwanted attention (if that is what it was) yourself and not delegate it to your husband. That really is playing the 'I'm just a woman & can't look after myself' card.

You've jumped from a call from a tradesman, about something to thinking he's going to turn up or stalk you or whatever.

What's the worst that could happen? He invites you out? In which case you say no thanks, I'm happily married and then think about reporting him.

On the other hand, I do know of couples - friends of friends- who have ended up in happy relationships with tradesmen who did work for them.

Cigarettesaftersex1 · 21/03/2023 16:26

AIBUNoNo · 21/03/2023 16:22

I see your point but I also think that an adult, you should be able to deal with unwanted attention (if that is what it was) yourself and not delegate it to your husband. That really is playing the 'I'm just a woman & can't look after myself' card.

You've jumped from a call from a tradesman, about something to thinking he's going to turn up or stalk you or whatever.

What's the worst that could happen? He invites you out? In which case you say no thanks, I'm happily married and then think about reporting him.

On the other hand, I do know of couples - friends of friends- who have ended up in happy relationships with tradesmen who did work for them.

OP didn't delegate anything to her husband, she mentioned it to him as you would if you lived in the same house and were married, HE said he wanted to call the guy/take it further but OP didn't want that at the time. It's all there in the OP

Newnamefor2021 · 21/03/2023 16:27

As a wife of a BG engineer I'll weigh in.

No, it's not typical but I wouldn't say it's completely unheard of either.

The system is pretty much automated now, so engineers are being given customers numbers and told they are to deal with issues. It's not part of their contract of course but they are sometimes told to sort of problem jobs or if the system gives them unrealistic workloads they are told they must call customers to reschedule. Sometimes the work load can be triple what's actually possible in a normal day, while other engineers have no work, and they expect engineers to sort it personally (usually in their own time) as they will be disciplined for taking any "unproductive" time.

They are also punished on work not completed on the day and potentially have to come in their off time to make up for it.

Likely if he thought the job might recall, so he called to check. I've known engineers to call in on their off time to resolve minor things to save the recall (this is obviously not company policy).

Alternatively he is worried because a job that has three call outs goes to a senior manager meeting and they have to justify why they didn't fix it. So he might be looking at what happened and why it wasn't fixed. So he can explain at the meeting. He could look at the report though, but potentially another engineer could blame the previous one on reports.

It's a crap job but they pay isn't bad (obviously not by MN standards) so it seems unlikely he would be doing it to get a date or whatever given it sounds like nothing happened and he acknowledged you have a partner. Although I suppose men have done weirder by thinking with their dicks.

NCforHairC · 21/03/2023 16:29

My BG man called me back as he needed a number from a certificate for something. It could all be above board!

AIBUNoNo · 21/03/2023 16:31

Cigarettesaftersex1 · 21/03/2023 16:26

OP didn't delegate anything to her husband, she mentioned it to him as you would if you lived in the same house and were married, HE said he wanted to call the guy/take it further but OP didn't want that at the time. It's all there in the OP

Show quote history

She didn't have to let him make the call though, did she? I am capable of reading, thank you. She was more likely to get a resolution if she had called him herself.

UneFoisAuChalet · 21/03/2023 16:32

Newnamefor2021 · 21/03/2023 16:27

As a wife of a BG engineer I'll weigh in.

No, it's not typical but I wouldn't say it's completely unheard of either.

The system is pretty much automated now, so engineers are being given customers numbers and told they are to deal with issues. It's not part of their contract of course but they are sometimes told to sort of problem jobs or if the system gives them unrealistic workloads they are told they must call customers to reschedule. Sometimes the work load can be triple what's actually possible in a normal day, while other engineers have no work, and they expect engineers to sort it personally (usually in their own time) as they will be disciplined for taking any "unproductive" time.

They are also punished on work not completed on the day and potentially have to come in their off time to make up for it.

Likely if he thought the job might recall, so he called to check. I've known engineers to call in on their off time to resolve minor things to save the recall (this is obviously not company policy).

Alternatively he is worried because a job that has three call outs goes to a senior manager meeting and they have to justify why they didn't fix it. So he might be looking at what happened and why it wasn't fixed. So he can explain at the meeting. He could look at the report though, but potentially another engineer could blame the previous one on reports.

It's a crap job but they pay isn't bad (obviously not by MN standards) so it seems unlikely he would be doing it to get a date or whatever given it sounds like nothing happened and he acknowledged you have a partner. Although I suppose men have done weirder by thinking with their dicks.

As the wife of an engineer - not BG - this is the most sensible - and likely scenario on this thread. So sensible that it will be ignored.

CustardySergeant · 21/03/2023 16:33

NCforHairC · 21/03/2023 16:29

My BG man called me back as he needed a number from a certificate for something. It could all be above board!

So why, when the OP's husband called, didn't he say that, instead of hanging up?

Why didn't this engineer record his visit to the OP's address like the other three did?