Am I stupidly poor? Or living in the real world?

[Chunkythighss]

Just off the back of another post…
people commenting that they will have to live off £1900 AFTER paying the mortgage and how this is going to be a struggle.

nearly £2000 a month extra.

This is more than I earn a month and pay rent, bills, etc… yet people are saying they’d struggle to live on this after bills?

Am I massively poor or is this normal? 🙈

It seems out of touch with so many people's lives.

I know people tend to spend up to their income level, but it's pretty startling and ludicrous.

I like to imagine these people are trolling and aren't really as head up their arse as the seem.

It’s definitely all relative. We have about £3.7k a month left after we pay our mortgage but our bills are quite large. Might sound like a lot but we’re not living the high life 🤷‍♀️

OP posts AIBU
“I wasn’t looking for a debate” 🤨……

I know, crazy, isn't it

everyone has expectations and aspirations that what they could afford if they were 10% richer would be "comfortable" whereas they are "just about making ends meet" and you'll hear the same phrases or minor variations of them from people with hoisehold incomes of £30,000 and £50,000 and £70,000 and £90,000 - it's human nature to consider ones own circumstances to be "normal". some people think they are struggling if they can only afford one week of skiing whereas all their acquaintances are doing 4 weeks. For some reason they don't have many friends who can't afford anything more than a caravan in Lyme Regis once a year.

you are very wrong, I have lived on less than that for decades, no benefits

We live in probably one of the most affordable places in the UK. I've just added up our essential bills including mortgage for a 3 bed semi, energy, water, TV licence, life insurance, council tax, Sky (yes not essential but 54 for phone, broadband and TV isn't bad) kids bus fares, school dinners, phones and sports for one child, clubs for the other, plus food and petrol (no car finance) is around 1600 a month. Plus we save every month. That's for 2 adults and 2 kids. Rent would be more expensive than our mortgage.

I can easily see how it could be 3k for someone living in more expensive parts of the UK.

We could definitely cut back if necessary but if we can afford to live well at the moment then we will.

But full time nursery for 2 children is easily £2k in London. So that's eaten up all of it immediately. And if you have 2 people commuting daily unto the centre from say zone 4 or 5 that's another £400 between you. And that's just the costs of working. Without thinking about food / heating let alone any luxuries.

Car: £120 (insurance, servicing, tax tyres)
Council tax: £400
Utilities: £500
House insurance: £150

£1160 - doesn't include dh's car, food, holidays, Christmas, clubs, phones, broadband, etc. Notwithstanding savings.

No debts, grown up children.

It’s not a surprise to me that people have different kind of bills, different outgoings? Don’t be ridiculous.

what IS a surprise to me is that people think having a spare £1900 (plus or minus some bills) is a tiny amount of money.

If it makes you feel better OP, I also "bring in" roughly £1900 a month.

This is £1700 salary and £200 benefits.

I work full time as a police officer. I'm on my own with 3 kids, so this is the only income that we have. Get £30 a month from their Dad through CMS as he's self employed (another story)...

I never thought growing up that my job would make me "rich", however I always thought jobs such as mine would enable a person to live a comfortable enough life... nope.

Out of my £1900 I have to pay my mortgage (try and see it as I'm lucky to even have one), all the usual bills, plus car costs which are a necessity due to where I'm based with work and getting the kids to school etc.

No gym memberships, phone contacts, private dentists or anything else here... we have Netflix and that's it! I used to have Spotify premium as my own personal treat as I love music but it had to go.

To even go out for a coffee would throw my budget out, so I truly have no life besides work and the children. My eldest son asked for £20 to go out with a new friend this month (started high school this year and finding his feet), and even that I view as a luxury/treat as it throws the budget out.

We shop cheaply and I skip meals to make sure the children have what they need. Our house is cold. Life is pretty miserable to be honest.

I could only dream of having my £1900 left over...

It depends massively on the ho usehold. I need £1600 to get by. Me and 18 year ds and we are mortgage free too. Car getting sold Thursday as I work from home and we enjoy an excellent bus service.

OP I think the problem here is the"plus or minus some bills bit"
I've just give you an example of how it absolutely doesn't add up for some families. When my twins were tiny, I had to give up work as me continuing would have cost us £2k childcare + extra 200pm travel costs. Unsurprisingly that's more than I earnt at the time!

If they have even only one child at nursery full time that would eat up over half to two-thirds or more of the £1,900.

But I get what you are saying as I only earn a little more over that in total. I avoid buying new clothes for myself and either buy the kids clothes in sales or from charity shops. Holidays are very occasional and would be long weekend breaks somewhere in the UK or nearby while the kids are with their dad. I can’t afford to take the kids away too.

I have some luxuries like going to exercise classes (cheaper than gym), I have a car and I go out a couple of times a week on average. I’m one of those earning just enough to not qualify for any benefits other than child benefits, but on a single income things are tight.

It's childcare that's the issue I think, and possibly travel costs if you're paying for a season train ticket which is hundreds a month. Even 2 children in childcare for 2.5 days with the 30 free hours used to cost us about £800 a month not in the South.

Yes, if you are only supporting yourself, you are in a "different world" to a family with two or three dependants @Chunkythighss.

I'd have loads of money left over if I didn't have two teenagers and an elderly mother.

@Nimbostratus100 ok well forget the benefits then other than child benefit. The rest of my point still stands. If you’re in a family with two adults working (which I know not everyone is) then the majority of families have more than £3k a month coming in. Hence why lots of people are saying they spend more than that.

And yes nursery/childcare fees easily run into the multi hundreds or even thousands.

I read that thread it was about the person asking about buying a £700k house. If someone has a huge house then everything else is more expensive too, council tax,electric, heating etc. I think that’s why people were saying it wasn’t enough

I knew which thread this would reference before I even opened it!
There was another a week or so again where the OP was trying to work out what to do with an improved income and got a massive pile on for saying her bills (not mortgage) came to £900 a month.

I have £2200 a month and I cover all bills for a family of 4 and overpay the mortgage so it comes to 1k. I manage to have several UK holidays a year and a reasonable life. Not flash but decent.

I do watch every penny though. Month to month isn't tight but it would be if I start buying daily coffees or lunch from the baker.

OP why do you keep saying '£1900 extra'?

How is the money left after paying rent/mortgage extra?

Our rent AND bills are £1400 a month (we pay way under market rent otherwise it'd be more like £1700). We then pay for petrol for two cars (needed for work), groceries and after school club.

Whatever is left after that is 'extra' though of course life has other costs I need to allow for which I try and set aside a little for each month - car MOTs, kids clothes and shoes as they outgrow them, little school costs.

It just feels like you're trying to make the other thread poster sound as ridiculous as possible by writing it as though they are wondering if £1900 a month after all life costs is doable. There is more to pay out than rent/mortgage as I'm sure you're aware. Money after housing isn't extra.

But I'm guessing you're one of the competitively frugal MNers where 4 chicken drumsticks and 100g rice feeds two adults/two teenagers for dinner with leftovers for lunch, a roast chicken serves six adults for three separate main meals etc

<Where do you buy a loaf of bread for 39p?>

I had to laugh at this question. This is the discounter (Lidl and Aldi) price, which bigger supermarkets like Tesco (Nevilles Bread) and others make a big song and dance about matching. If you are hungry, you are delighted to have 39p bread and jam.

There is a thread on FB www.facebook.com/groups/155365141797826 where people try to provide menus which enable survival on 50p each a day. This isn't for fun. It's to help desperate people balance the books, and is an extremely popular and vibrant thread.

I was confused £1900 + mortgage total income or £1900 left after bills? If you've got to pay for everything (except mortgage) out of £1900 I'd consider that quite poor as a working family with lots of outgoings, a single person would be ok.

I think its irrelevant whether you get £1000 a month or £10,000 a month as your outgoings and lifestyle usually fit that amount. The problem is when that amount drastically drops it massively impacts your life and I think that's the point others where making on the other thread.

It's horses for courses! For us £1900 after mortgage wouldn't cover half of the outgoings we have. For some it's more than they earn! I think the latter is more common though.

This