To expect fiancé to buy Mother’s Day card?

[Worried08]

Been together 10+ years and have a 1 year old DS together. Argued last year due to him not making an effort on the first Mother’s Day with DS (no card, no anything) says he doesn’t believe in the day. Fair enough but I always make the effort for Father’s Day and he knows the day is important to me.

For the record, he does buy his own mother gifts, a card and cooks or pays for a meal on the day. He has just mentioned in passing that he hasn’t got me anything for tomorrow (not even a card). I’ve had a little cry. I know I must sound ridiculous but it’s the card over anything like a fancy gift or breakfast in bed. I do the majority of everything for our DS despite us both working full time. I’m just angry as it feels there is a total lack of appreciation or acknowledgment. AIBU?

Mine doesn't care about 'days'. Right at the beginning of the relationship we had the conversation and I said that I do. Therefore since he cares about me, he should act accordingly.

He has never missed a 'day'. You don't 'believe in it'? Great, I won't do anything. I do, so you do. I think football is fucking stupid. I don't say that while DH is spending time watching or going to matches.

Within reason, if your partner cares about something you indulge it a little.

Your child is too young to know, so a card purportedly "from them" would have no meaning. Just wait until they're old enough to draw you one at nursery.
And you are not your partner's mother!

It would have meaning for OP.

He knows his mum would be upset if he didn’t bother. He knows you will be too but doesn’t care enough and knows you’ll tolerate it. That’s shit and really hurtful.