Aaargh! WIBU to say if I’m such a strong candidate, why didn’t you give me the bloody job!

[Swosh]

So 4 interviews over the last 2 weeks. All really great roles at a higher salary and better conditions. 3 through employment agencies who had already remotely interviewed me and said I would be great for their roles.

Feedback from actual job interviews were that I came cross really well, my answers were great and I was a ‘very strong candidate’ but I was ‘pipped at the post’ for all of them! Obviously a lie to make me feel better at wasting my time.

What on earth am I doing wrong?

Two interviews involved walking up flights of stairs to get to the interview room (why couldn’t the damn room be on the ground floor?!) and as I’ve put a bit of weight on over the last year as working from home, I admit that I was a bit breathless almost keeled over at the start of the interview.

Could it be because I’m fat? Most of the roles were WFH though and I look fine head and shoulders wise.

I dress smart, well groomed, well spoken (don’t smell of BO).

At the interview I had this morning they said they had more interviews lined up for the rest of today and all day tomorrow so would come to me on Thursday but they called me at lunchtime to say that I was great but pipped at the post again and they had struggled to choose between me and another candidate, which I thought was odd. What about the other interviews they had apparently had lined up for today and tomorrow?

WIBU to ask my thread title when I inevitably get knocked back from the two interviews I’ve got lined up next week?

I resigned from my last job due to toxic environment and crap pay last month (bit heat of the moment) so desperately need to get another one!

Unfortunately it is much harder to get a job when you are already unemployed so that may be a factor.

I'm not a fan of it, but almost all my employers roles are now advertised internally only. It's assumed that you can't do that. You can and its easy.

I have conducted interviews for loads of roles.

Sometimes it really is a decision between 2 or more equally good candidates.
And you really can’t give them meaningful feedback on what they could have been stronger on.
Sometimes you do have a good internal candidate and you need to interview a wider field alongside them. Sometimes they get the job, sometimes they don’t.
Sometimes it does come down to ‘who do we want in the office if there is a serious crisis? Who will deal best with the office maverick when they fail to submit their invoices in time? Who will cope with that client who…’, all a bit random and subjective because they are neck and neck.

Sometimes I have been on panels where a member or two would veer towards some discriminatory factor, like weight, in a tricky decision, but have been set straight by other panel members. In my sector, anyway.

KBO OP! The right job is out there for you somewhere.

I detest giving feedback and would probably say similar.

Very likely you are not doing anything wrong. Just that the winning candidate was the better fit.

I was offered a job as on Friday during the interview when asked about working in a team, I said I make a cracking brew, like a laugh and taught myself to be less sarcastic.

It was actually for a serious role with a lot of responsibilities and it wasn’t the answer they were looking for 😆 but the panel laughed and said I’d fit right in.

When I interview I'd only give feedback saying 'you were a strong candidate' to a genuine strong candidate. Others I'd just give honest feedback about where they didn't have the experience/skills of our preferred candidate. So I think you are getting positive feedback. Have you ever had interview training? The most common mistake I see candidates make is over-talking and not answering the question. Overly nervous or overly confident/brash doesn't play well either.

I always try to bring a bit of humour into interviews though. Not laugh a minute but try to make them laugh a few times. Don’t talk about personal stuff, very polite and certainly not shy or brash. Thank them for their time etc.

I’ve been told I’m a bit intimidating because I come across as a bit posh and like I’m overqualified by colleagues in my last role, had comments before of ‘how come you’re doing this job’.

Used to be in high level admin roles (Chief Execs PA) but took long career breaks after having my DC so conversely told not enough recent experience to get back into those kind of roles so going for mid/senior level admin roles now.

You said you knew if someone was a definite no in 10 seconds and then brought the interview to a close as soon as possible. Just judging you on what you said.

These people have spent hours on your recruitment process. They've given up holiday to come see you. It costs them money to come on the train. Maybe they are nervous but rather than think "clicking fingers, a little odd, oh well let's see if we can find some positives" you've jumped to "no".

It’s so tough. Usually be a final round interview for my team you will have been screened by a recruiter, I’ve seen your CV, you’ve had a first round interview and done a practical test (it’s a senior and we’ll paid team, so people are fine with these steps).

If you’ve got through that, you almost certainly are very good and could do the job. But if I only have one role, you still won’t get it if I like the other person more.

I honestly don’t know whether that’s more useful feedback than the bland ‘pipped at the post’ stuff.

Get over yourself! I bet you live in a perfect Cliche world.

Taking a candidate up stairs and having them very breathless and clearly suffering would certainly be at the back of my mind, as I’d be worried about high level of sick leave

What are you saying when they ask why you left your last job?

How long is a “long” career break?

OP, you say you got feedback but you didn't really.

You can ask for your interviews scores, and what the appointable mark was. This will show you if you were close to being appointed, and give you an idea of how you were assessed.

I don't think it had anything to do with weight at all.

I do think you might need to work on balancing previous high-level experience with the current roles. Making it clear why you are interested & that you are.

Good luck! Don't despair, there's a role out there for you.

So these were all positions with only one interview involved?

Not laugh a minute but try to make them laugh a few times*

noooooooooo!!!!

I always try to bring a bit of humour into interviews though

do NOT do this OP. Seriously.

@LondonTripPlanning

You sound awful - as an interviewer & in your responses to @mellicauli

Judging someone immediately is really poor on your part. When I interview, everyone gets the same opportunity, questions & time. Then they are scored. It is true that sometimes it is immediately clear if someone isn't going to work out, but I will always give a full opportunity.

Nonsense.
If it's appropriate for the conversation there's absolutely nothing wrong with being lighthearted.

I don't want to work anywhere where you can't have a bit of a joke.

I agree.

It's fine if something naturally happens but in general, play it straight.

I don't want to work anywhere where you can't have a bit of a joke.

Me neither, and it's fine to be relaxed and conversational at the start / end but definitely not when answering questions. It's about focusing on the task in hand, it's not the place to be humorous.

@EarringsandLipstick

And yet you’ve judged me on a couple of sentences on an anonymous forum?? That doesn’t match your holier than thou attitude does it?

I’m just being honest - something I find lacking on Mumsnet threads about jobs and interviewing.

It is toe curling to see an interview as a chance to make them laugh, inject humour.

It is very very David Brent.

Unless you are going for a job involving being a comic… avoid trying to make interviewers laugh.

For a start… you have absolutely bugger all idea of what their sense of humour is like

Oh yeah that's fair - you can't answer a serious question with a joke or it looks like you're avoiding the question.

Yes, that's right. I've judged you on what you have written here & your nasty responses to another poster. That's all I can judge you on.

You are a terrible interviewer if you make snap judgments, then conclude an interview as quickly as possible.

That's poor performance, not honesty.