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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask, at what age your children stopped having a babysitter?

87 replies

sawseesaw · 10/03/2023 19:48

I'm out late (past midnight) tonight. DD is outraged and says she'd rather be alone and she's too old to have a babysitter.
I'll say how old she is in a bit. Want to see your responses first.

OP posts:
Tayegete · 10/03/2023 22:02

Oldest was 15 nearly 16 and youngest was 12.

newforest1 · 10/03/2023 22:02

How old is she turn op

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 10/03/2023 22:20

Dh and I went out locally for dinner the other night. Dds 12 and 14 were on their own til 9pm. They both have phones and are sensible.

How old is your dd?

Octomingo · 10/03/2023 22:27

Who do people get to babysit their 13 year olds? Not counting family. And how old are they? We've left ours, because if we didn't, we'd never go out as a couple. It was easier when dc was younger.

Radiodread · 10/03/2023 22:30

Secondary age. If they can go to school alone, go into town alone etc, they can stay home till about 11pm. Mine aren't usually asleep by then anyway and we do have a barky dog and live in a city. Im more comfortable leaving two alone than one.

EsmeSusanOgg · 10/03/2023 22:43
  1. But not overnight until 16.
gogohmm · 10/03/2023 22:45

About 12 for early evening stuff 13/14 for whole evenings

MatildaJayne · 10/03/2023 23:23

My 14 yo DS1 used to babysit the younger 2, age 12 and 9 until midnight. Before that I got a babysitter.

BillyDeanisnotmylover · 10/03/2023 23:56

12-14 depending on how sensible they are.

Original poster
sawseesaw · 11/03/2023 01:04

Well I'm back now from a lovely night out.
She is 11 (going on 41).

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 11/03/2023 01:38

sweeneytoddsrazor · 10/03/2023 21:14

Surely most 13/14 year olds are competent enough to rustle up some toast or bung something in the microwave if they get hungry in the evening. Presumably they will have a proper meal before you go out. How many teenagers start cooking a meal as a snack of an evening

My 12 yo can cook a three course meal with homemade condiments (she's very weird) but that's not my bar. My bar is, emergencies. And she isn't quite there yet at night.

Florenz · 11/03/2023 01:42

Secondary school age. But it depends on the child.

bellsbuss · 11/03/2023 01:51

Aged 14 our eldest would babysit our younger children aged 8 and 4. We would only go out locally. Once age was 16 we would go out out. I was babysitting from aged 13 for 3 children under 5, one of them a baby, different times.

Pubesofsoberness · 11/03/2023 02:00

I'd say 13

Mothership4two · 11/03/2023 02:24

sawseesaw · 11/03/2023 01:04

Well I'm back now from a lovely night out.
She is 11 (going on 41).

Definitely not at 11! About 14 I think looking after his 9 year old brother.

Mind you I was regularly left alone from around 8/9 years old. Put to bed first but got straight up obviously. But that was back in the dark ages!

Dartmoorcheffy · 11/03/2023 02:33

12

Having said that my parents were dance teachers and out most nights til midnight fron me being 11 but I was boring and sensible and would do my homework then read quite happily.

Hence · 11/03/2023 03:35

I moved out at 16, so I do find some of these answers bizarre. People join the army at 16.

Florenz · 11/03/2023 03:57

I was working at 14. Part time during the school term but pretty much full time during the holidays. Including running a market stall on my own. The thought of having a babysitter at that age would have been absolutely mortifying to me.

MajesticWhine · 11/03/2023 04:18

We have stopped getting babysitters over the last year. DD is 12.

SybilWrites · 11/03/2023 04:25

I've just started leaving my nearly 15 year old (next month) and my 10 year old when I go out. I don't know when I'll feel comfortable leaving the youngest alone though.

Dalekjastninerels · 11/03/2023 04:32

11 and my brother was 8; we did not get along at all, but parents said they trusted us.

So I stayed in my room and read my books; brother stayed in his room and played Lego.

We knew if we fought our parents would not trust us; so we kept apart

It went well :)

Sunflowergirl1 · 11/03/2023 05:50

14 for short evenings, ie not past their bedtime on a weekend.

16 when later.

I was more sensitive to leaving due to an area I used to work on and didn't like taking risks with my children.

Their maturity is a big factor as well

feathermucker · 11/03/2023 05:58

For me, it was when he started secondary school that I was happy to leave him to go on a night out.

He's pretty sensible and we're well acquainted with our neighbours, plus our best friends live about 100 yards away.

Depends on the child in question and location, availability of help in an emergency etc.

My friend's boy - never at 11/12.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 11/03/2023 06:05

It depends on the child and whether they're happy to be at home alone. But for me I'd say once they're at secondary school.

Littlegoth · 11/03/2023 06:34

12 in the evening (only very very occasional).

from change to secondary in school holidays.