Will I make dd look like an idiot if I raise issues about this?

[Jerseytired]

DD is in sixth form. She has autism, OCD and emetophobia.
She is extremely sensitive to textures and smells. Her OCD became very bad in lockdown, counting, checking, massive contamination fears, washing her hands until raw etc,

She has been at college for three years, she has even made bacteria but because it was done clinically she was fine.

Last week a tutor was putting fake bacteria on the students, some asked not to for skin reasons and DD told them she had OCD. The teacher laughed at her and sprayed it getting some on dd and her coat. DD came home and absolutely lost it.

Next week they are doing a practical that involves bacteria, fake sick etc. DD remembers it last year when the other class did it and she could not even walk passed the room without feeling ill.
DD has again told her tutor she has OCD and asked for help but she has just told her she HAS to do it or she will fail her and dd is freaking out.

aibu to at least speak to the tutor and ask for reasonable adjustments

That is outrageous and you should complain as well as requesting the adjustments (I’m a teacher).

poor dd

Last week a tutor was putting fake bacteria on the students, some asked not to for skin reasons and DD told them she had OCD. The teacher laughed at her and sprayed it getting some on dd and her coat. DD came home and absolutely lost it.

That is awful OP.

Contact the SENCO.

This is absolutely not on.

YANBU! This is absolutely terrible. Your dad has a health condition that is protected by the Equality Act and legally they have to make reasonable adjustments.

The teacher who sprayed her with bacteria needs a serious talking to.

You would not be unreasonable to raise it with the tutor. If this was my child I would ask for her to be excused from the lesson if they refused to make adjustments in this case as surely a child freaking out needs more support from staff than a child who has been accommodated in this task so it is in their own interests to make adjustments.

Presumably it wasn't actually bacteria?

Definitely fake bacteria!
I believe it was the stuff you can show under a light and it shows up.

I'd contact the college too. Including all of the above I'd remind them that no means no
The course needs to differentiate for those who can't participate at
They should not be laughing about it

That is horrific. Definitely raise it.

Your dd has tried to speak up for herself and it never worked but credit to her for trying to do this. I would start of by emailing (so theirs a paper trail) including her subject teacher, her tutor, the senco, head of house/year or equivalent and anyone else that has been involved. Ask for a response and a plan of action. Even if they call you follow up the call with a email thanking the person who called for clarification on what will happen as without a paper trail theirs no proof. Good luck.

I'd go bananas about this. You absolutely can raise it.

Suspect the challenges of people using OCD so generally these days, many don't get what it really is and how serious it is.

I hope your DD can miss the lesson without penalty next week

Sorry I mean using the term OCD incorrectly

Is she diagnosed ? They should make “reasonable adjustment” at college, if it is.

Fully diagnosed with the Autism
The autism team diagnosed significant 'ocd type issues' which is further being investigated currently

YANBU
Agree with others that your dd has tried. I hope you get it sorted for her.

You don’t need a diagnosis to be covered by the Equality Act

What's the actual course and is this an intrinsic part of it? Such as access to nursing or health care where this is part of it that can't be avoided?
If so it's a bit unreasonable, if its just a small 'isn't this interesting to learn' then absolutely she shouldn't have to.

That's bullying behaviour. The teacher will be aware of your DDs autism diagnosis and her OCD profile. Therefore it is absolutely appalling that he behaved in this way. In particular, laughing as he sprayed her after she specifically asked him not to. That is deliberate goading behaviour. What a nasty thing to do.

It is more than reasonable for you to contact the SENDCo and HoD to alert them to your concerns regarding this teacher's behaviour towards your DD.

It IS a social care course so I am fully aware of the issue around this however she has been doing the same subject since year 9, so for six years in some form (it was the only course she could get on at college) and this is the first time this has come up and she finishes in June, hence asking for advice here first!

She will not be going on to do health care when she finishes.
She could just fail and stop next week to be honest and it would not make a difference but seems a waste so close to finishing if something can be done to help her.

What is wrong with some people?

Yes, raise it. The incident last week should not have occurred, and reasonable adjustments need to be put in place for people with protected characteristics such as the disabilities your daughter has.

Your daughter won't look like an idiot but others may be spared from this teachers idiotic behaviour.

Yadnbu normally I don't normally agree with parents getting involved of a child of that age. However your daughter has tried and the tutor is not listening. So I think you've been left with no choice but to step in. The tutor is completely out of order her behaviour is absolutely disgusting and she needs to be pulled up on this

What course is it? If it is a BTEC assignment then there may be some difficult circumnavigating it

Definitely raise it with the college. Surely it comes under the criteria of ‘reasonable adjustments’. It must be possible to do the task in a different way, even if that means the staff thinking creatively about how it can be done.

I agree that it would be good for her to finish the course, even if she doesn’t use it career wise. It will be good for her self esteem to have completed it and shows evidence of sticking to a course of study.

As @JavaChip says, it sounds like the tutor didn't take her seriously because every other kid "has" mental health issues or allergies these days, and therefore assumed that what she meant.

Hopefully when the tutor realises that this is a genuine medical issue for DD she will apologise, and quite frankly, be mortified at what she did.

I would have hoped that all DD's tutors would be aware of her autism diagnosis and the detail of it...but from a similar school incident with a friend's child recently, I know that won't necessarily be the case.

It’s not real bacteria, it will be a dye that they’ll go around touching things and then a light will show how far the ‘bacteria’ can spread.

As it’s not actual bacteria then the OCD is a bit irrelevant.

However, that’s not the issue.

It shouldn’t matter whether DD has OCD or not because if you’re not comfortable with having something sprayed on your hands then you should just be able to say no thank you and not partake.

I would definitely have a chat to the teacher and just say there are certain things DD is comfortable with and certain things she’s not and you’d like her to have the choice whether to join in or not.

As your DD has joined in with other things, the teacher just may not be aware and thought she was joking especially as it wasn’t bacteria.

My DD has awful anxiety and was extremely worried about giving a presentation in front of the class (being sick, self harming etc). I spoke to the teacher and she was lovely and said she didn’t realise and thought it was normal nerves like everyone had. She is now aware for future presentations and let’s us know in advance and gives all students the chance to do it on their own and break times.

Does your Dd have an EHCP? Even without this, she is entitled to reasonable adjustments. Contact the SENCO at the college as well as the Course Leader. There is always a way round even if it is a BTEC assignment - my dd recently finished a Level 3 BTEC at a very supportive college - there were several things she was unable to participate in due to ASD and OCD - they always accommodated her. For example, she was allowed to watch some experiments on a video so she could watch small sections at a time enabling her to cope.