Is DP pregnant?

[Thepowerofawoman]

He's obviously not as he doesn't have a womb.

DP plays 5 a side once a week with his mates, they are all 30+

Recently DP has put on a bit on weight (around half a stone) and it's gone straight to his belly - to be honest I actually prefer him with a bit of a 'dad bod' but for reference, DP is 5'9 and 13 stone (so a little overweight if you look at the BMI).

He's come home from football the last few weeks angry / upset, saying one guy keeps saying 'when's the baby due' 'how many months gone are you' things like that. Absolutely pathetic for grown men.

DP has taken this to heart and now is becoming obsessive with losing weight / wanting to go for a run.
He has never once mentioned being unhappy with his weight before this man child keeps hurling abuse at him. Neither had he mentioned going for a run!

We drove back 400 miles today from a long weekend break, within the hour he is out the door going for a run (in the pitch black) because he's worrying about this guys remarks.

I don't really know what my AIBU is, but I fancied a rant about it because it's doing my head in that is bothering him so much when we was happy with his weight previously.

This!!

@Eyerollcentral
As I previously said - I am not unhappy with him wanting to lose weight, i am for it if thats what will make him happy and healthy.

I was merely saying he looks attractive to me in my opening.

I am unhappy that the remarks have made him have to do this, he didn't want to run, but felt like he had to because of said remarks.

Well we found the idiot on the thread pretty quickly.

that’s utterly shit for your DH. I hate folk who go out their way to make others feel rubbish or small.

Last week after he came back from football.
Previous to that, at Christmas, hence I know it's half a stone...

Yes, we are working on cleaning that up 😊
A beer every night and snacks from the work tuck box thing have been removed most days.

FGS just support him, he's being bullied.

As other posters have said sometimes it takes a harsh wake up call - an ill judged joke or an unflattering picture - to make us realise actually I have put on q a lot of weight. I’d personally be more concerned if he laughed it off. I’m sure everyone trying to lose weight, maintain their figure or train for an event has said I really don’t want to do this but I need to, I know I have, many times. I genuinely don’t see what’s obsessive about that. Getting older is harder too as weight doesn’t just fall off like it used do and many men find they have to change their diet and exercise routines to avoid really putting on weight.

Poor fella. My boyfriend became quite self-conscious and started obsessively exercising after someone kept ribbing him about his body too (he's not even slightly overweight, just has a slight tummy). It's not a bad thing at all to aim for fitness or a nice body, but nowadays you wouldn't dare say such things to any woman, so why is it acceptable to body shame a random man. Not to be all "poor menz" but I get why you feel upset for him!

Ah I think this is quite an ill-informed POV :) So belly-wise, men tend to gain and store visceral fat, whereas women tend to gain subcutaneous fat. If an individual man's abdominal (belly) fat takes the form of subcutaneous instead of visceral fat, that can actually be healthier.

Also, fat distribution mostly depends on your genes, but in general men are more likely to gain abdominal fat (beer belly / "apple" shape) whereas women tend to gain gluteofemoral fat (lower body / "pear" shape) which is conducive for child-bearing.

Also, I don't think any posters would be too pleased if a woman at their yoga class made regular fat jokes about them!

Someone you know lovingly pointing out that you've put on a bit of a spare tyre is quite different.

Men are so lucky that way with their extra muscle mass and testosterone.

They cut back some calories, add some crunches, push ups, and a brisk walk daily and they're quickly towards a 6 pack.

This is exactly what I meant - thank you.

Thank you for your insight on the belly fat - I didn't know this, but explains the 'beer belly'

We are working on the diet which I'm sure is going to help in the long run also 😊

I can't imagine a woman shouting these remarks in yoga class - I get there is male banter but when it's taken to heart and it's week and week it's a bit much!

It’s not healthy though is it? 🙄

I can see where your username comes from, but perhaps your eyes would be better served re-reading what you wrote instead of rolling around rampantly. :)

It's not the epitome of health, but it's definitely not "really unhealthy" as you said earlier. It's perfectly normal and natural.

6 pick abs would be the healthiest (and even then, you can have a bit of a gut when you're not flexing - I do, with a very toned stomach). But otherwise, most people have a bit of a tummy. It's more visible in some than others, but that doesn't at all mean it's more unhealthy – all it shows is your tendency towards fat distribution both internally/externally and in terms of specific external region. (In fact, first-world East Asian populations prone to being skinny have the highest risk for "invisible" diseases like diabetes – which would be lower if they were prone to gathering subcutaneous fat instead of visceral fat.) Trust Science over what you think!

Oh believe me I do trust science. Most medical opinion indicates a ‘beer belly’ is worse than high cholesterol or smoking for men in terms of risk factors for heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc.

You're being condescending around the wrong person, who's in literally this field! Lifestyle factors are indeed linked to abdominal fat (above a certain waist-to-hip circumference ratio, hence my being unfazed by most people having a slight tummy), but I haven't heard anything as alarmist as abdominal fat in itself posing a worse risk factor than smoking or high cholesterol. Would you mind linking some sources?

All I can find on Google re: what you said is an article on DudeProducts.com, and a professor's quote on a random Men's Health article (putting aside the fact that it's a magazine and not a journal, if you were quoting that, you misread as the article focus was a hard belly and not a beer belly per se – incidentally relating to the visceral vs subcutaneous fat distinction I referenced earlier).

What field are you in if you have never heard of this link? I didn’t say a beer belly caused any illness itself, if you look at what I actually said you will note I said it was a high risk factor for various diseases including cancer. I heard about it first when my brother in law was diagnosed with heart disease quite young, never smoked, but did have a beer belly. My sister is a post doctoral researcher in a related field and naturally researched it in some detail. I don’t think if other men are asking the OP’s husband if he is preggers then it’s not a slight belly is it

Again, I can see the reason for your username – your frequent denial of what you literally just said is eyeroll inducing indeed.

First you warn that it's "really unhealthy" for one of the literal most likely demographics to have a beer belly based on biological fat distribution, then you backtrack to "it's not healthy though is it".

Then you claim "Most medical opinion indicates a ‘beer belly’ is worse than high cholesterol or smoking for men in terms of risk factors for heart disease, diabetes, high blood pressure, etc."
That is really alarmist and would make most medical professionals sit up!

That somehow turns into "if you look at what I actually said you will note I said it was a high risk factor for various diseases including cancer."
Well yes, that's common sense. Any idiot on the street can tell you that. That said, lots of things are high risk factors.

The bolded statements contradict each other. Also, your brother in law is 1 case, and your sister is not "most medical opinion". If she has published any research, I would genuinely be interested in reading it.

I regret that I have to bold and underline things as if you're illiterate, when you're the one spewing them out. Let's end this conversation here. :)

‘First you warn that it's "really unhealthy" for one of the literal most likely demographics to have a beer belly based on biological fat distribution, then you backtrack to "it's not healthy though is it". That’s not back tracking. ‘Really unhealthy’ and ‘not healthy’ mean more or less the same thing?
‘regret that I have to bold and underline things as if you're illiterate, when you're the one spewing them out. Let's end this conversation here.’ Lol
What field are you in again?

Absolutely agree.

A man coming here and saying his wife was being bullied about being fat at a leisure activity wouldn't be getting advice about how his wife could lose weight.

Nor would someone have asked "What exactly do you like about a [mum] bod - the [fat] boobs or the rolls of fat around the waist?"

Or said that the bully had "done her a favour".