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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Newport Car Crash

127 replies

RedEyeBaby · 06/03/2023 19:01

I am very saddened to read of the death of three friends from Newport, and of the horror of the other two sitting in the car next to their dead friends for two days and nights.

I'm not sure why the police were unable to act faster - surely there is a window for life with a missing person, and the faster they are found, after going missing for whatever reason, the better.

The police suggested to one of the mums that they would turn up with hangovers. All five of them? Really?

I seem to remember things being better than this in the past, but perhaps it varies by force. But why should that be? I saw a thread on here over the weekend about this, before they were found and some posters suggested a car accident. It would have been so easy to send some patrols out on likely routes. I can't help but think that they might all have survived if found faster. 46 hours is just hellish to wait.

So I wanted to ask as many of you who would want to, to get one of the free family tracking apps on your phone. I have life 360 and when I broke down at night in the snow in the middle of nowhere, with two babies in the back, and I called the police, they were very uninterested. My parents found me on the app and were there within an hour, and they would have done so if i was unconscious. After 46 hours my phone would have run out of charge, but if those young people had had something like this, who knows, it may have turned out differently.

I guess my aibu is to ask if aibu to think it could save lives to use such an app. It's free and obviously there is no benefit to me, it's not my app.

OP posts:
UthredofBattenberg · 06/03/2023 21:02

HobnobsChoice · 06/03/2023 20:26

There was a case about 6 years ago where a man was missing for a week and had died after crashing and the car was obscured by trees. It not unheard of for it to happen.
www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-tees-38573790
The families must feel devastated and obviously want answers. There will be an inquest in due course which will hopefully give them some answers.

I remember that case, it was featured on a BBC series about missing people.

Its very very sad what has happened. But the vast majority of young people who don't reappear after a night out DO appear again, hungover, tired and decided to crash at a mates house for a couple of days.

IHaveaSetOfVeryParticularSkills · 06/03/2023 21:05

PleasedontRN · 06/03/2023 20:31

As a close personal friend to one of the families involved, please leave this alone right now.

Read the threads, people

LibrariansGiveUsPower · 06/03/2023 21:07

drpet49 · 06/03/2023 20:12

This. How many cars drove past and yet no a single one saw the crashed car.

It was off the A48. The main road eastbound out of Cardiff. One of the highest traffic A roads in Wales. thousands of cars must have passed the site.

Redglitter · 06/03/2023 21:08

IHaveaSetOfVeryParticularSkills · 06/03/2023 21:05

Read the threads, people

Absolutely this!!!

SweetSenorita · 06/03/2023 21:08

Very sad situation for those involved, their families and friends.

Regarding the tracking app, for me absolutely not. Never. I'm already tracked everywhere I go by CCTV. A life being voluntary tracked and traced by friends and family is no life for me. I'm a free spirit. I'd like it to stay that way 😚

Badger1970 · 06/03/2023 21:10

I can't even begin to imagine how those families are feeling today. It's also worth remembering that no other motorists saw any track marks or sign of a car in the trees....

RunningFromInsanity · 06/03/2023 21:14

I’d much rather the police went out to a stranded mum with young children in the car than some of the crap they get sent to (drunks, petty arguments etc). Definitely don’t consider that a waste of my taxes.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 06/03/2023 21:14

As a close personal friend to one of the families involved, please leave this alone right now *

Bolding this for you, PleasedontRN on the offchance it might make any difference - somehow I doubt it, but it's got to be worth a try

iamnottoofatiamjusttooshort · 06/03/2023 21:15

PleasedontRN · 06/03/2023 20:31

As a close personal friend to one of the families involved, please leave this alone right now.

I agree

Very very distasteful

RIP 💐

Happysalley · 06/03/2023 21:16

Something similar happened near me 5 months ago. A car went off an A road and into a field. It was found on its roof 2 days later by the farmer with the poor man deceased inside.

It's incredibly sad 😔

Womencanlift · 06/03/2023 21:24

Puzzledandpissedoff · 06/03/2023 21:14

As a close personal friend to one of the families involved, please leave this alone right now *

Bolding this for you, PleasedontRN on the offchance it might make any difference - somehow I doubt it, but it's got to be worth a try

I have reported this thread and the other one too. Just like the man arrested, people are using others’ grief for their own entertainment. Same as what happened with Nicola

Theluggage15 · 06/03/2023 21:25

Why don’t all you grief vultures fuck off? You’re repulsive.

IHaveaSetOfVeryParticularSkills · 06/03/2023 21:26

Womencanlift · 06/03/2023 21:24

I have reported this thread and the other one too. Just like the man arrested, people are using others’ grief for their own entertainment. Same as what happened with Nicola

I did a while ago before I posted.
Taking a look apparently

Redglitter · 06/03/2023 21:28

i did a while ago before I posted.
Taking a look apparently

I got that too

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 06/03/2023 21:30

You did criticise the police, OP, in your view they should be doing x, y, z. It's not your place, it really isn't. I don't why mumsnet has become the mecca for ghoulish yet pointless speculation, it certainly isn't better for it.

Posters don't have to 'scroll by' either, they can rightly post on the thread and tell you what they think of your insensitive post. Ugh.

CJsGoldfish · 06/03/2023 21:31

I'm not criticising the police. I don't know why what happened, happened. I don't know why they weren't found for so long
You absolutely were. Re read your post, no way is that NOT criticising the police.

It is easy to understand why they weren't found for so long. No skids, no obvious disturbances. You really can't understand why? Thousands of people drove past and saw nothing but you 'can't understand'? Really?

Such a tragedy. I'm glad you would have done it 'better' with your tracking app but not everyone needs or wants that level of control over other adults🤷‍♀️

Port1aCastis · 06/03/2023 21:32

I feel so sad for the families of the deceased and I really hope the grief vultures in the media and online will leave them alone.

Astrabees · 06/03/2023 21:32

I think it is good that the police have referred themselves. The family members quoted in The press before the car was found felt the police did not appreciate the gravity of the situation. It is sad we can no longer have much faith in the police.

Theluggage15 · 06/03/2023 21:33

Why are threads about daft celebrities taken down so rapidly as ‘not in the spirit’ but ghoulish threads like this about real tragedies affecting normal people allowed and encouraged by Mumsnet? It really is becoming a trash website now.

DogInATent · 06/03/2023 21:34

If you saw a car in a ditch at the side of the road on the way into work in the morning and it looked like it had been there all night, what would you do?

What would you really do - what would you have done last week before this story broke?

Kedece2410 · 06/03/2023 21:34

The family members quoted in The press before the car was found felt the police did not appreciate the gravity of the situation

I think 2 forces, numerous officers, media appeals shows that they did appreciate it was a serious situation

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 06/03/2023 21:37

Theluggage15, I don't know why, it's irritating, isn't it? I've reported this thread. It shouldn't need saying that other people's tragic events have no place as a hot topic for discussion but some people just have no grace whatsoever.

RedEyeBaby · 06/03/2023 21:38

DogInATent · 06/03/2023 21:34

If you saw a car in a ditch at the side of the road on the way into work in the morning and it looked like it had been there all night, what would you do?

What would you really do - what would you have done last week before this story broke?

Not sure if your question is for me or for the posters in general but I would call 101 when I got into work. But I understand that this car was not visible.

OP posts:
BooksAndHooks · 06/03/2023 21:38

If you don’t want to be tracked. If you have up to date iPhone software and an eligible handset you can switch on the option for crash detection, if the phone detects a crash and doesn’t get a response from you it will auto call emergency services with your location. If there is no signal it will connect via satellite. Worth checking if this option is available on your phone and checking you have it switched on.

drpet49 · 06/03/2023 21:39

RedEyeBaby · 06/03/2023 20:44

The fact that I was on the road and potentially causing a hazard to others. They say to get out of the car but I had two very small children and it was snowing. I didn't know what to do.

I think it was wise to ring the police in that occasion as you were worried about being a hazard to other road users in snow.