To think I can WFH 9-5 in the holidays with my kids at home
TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 05/03/2023 13:38
I recently started a new job where I’m based at home full time. Was a bit nervous at first not going into an office as I’ve only ever had office based roles but I’ve found a good rhythm and routine and we meet in big city once a month so I’m happy with that.
I was off through February half term but I don’t want to use all my holidays too soon. Obviously Easter holidays are coming up. My kids are 6&9. Holiday clubs not only cost a fortune but the kids absolutely hate going to them. I can get family childcare for a couple of days and DH can take a couple of days off bit WIBU to keep them at home while I work? They’re old enough to entertain themselves i’d just need to make their lunch and check they’re still alive.
For context - I know people at my new work who WFH on half days with their 1yo babies there. One of them was late to a meeting the other day because the health visitor was round!
Am I being unreasonable?AIBU
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Sidge · 05/03/2023 14:18
How on Earth are you going to manage the long summer holidays? Six or more weeks of having them at home with one bank holiday?
It’s not fair on your employer/colleagues/clients. And it’s definitely not fair on your children for six weeks. You need childcare in some capacity for some of those weeks. Tough if they don’t like clubs, they’ll just have to find one they do like.
Jules912 · 05/03/2023 14:22
I could do this with my 10 year old but he finds it boring and asks to go to holiday club. The 7 year old, no chance, she'd be bothering me every 10 minutes! Also my work don't allow it for primary age (or lower) children. They turn a blind eye in emergencies but would catch on pretty quickly if it was a regular thing.
MeAndTequila · 05/03/2023 14:23
Wheneversequencer · 05/03/2023 14:14
MeAndTequila · Today 14:01
My kids hated holiday clubs too, they loved being at home with all their toys, consoles, our animals, playing outside and they liked to have a longer sleep in in the mornings. We’d go out for lunch or to the park for an hour or so. And with the family help you have on some days, they’ll be fine. And you can do more stuff with them on the weekends.
No wonder kids are turning into snowflakes! Sounds overindulged. It's good for them to learn to get up, be bored, do stuff they don't like. Of course they are going to say they hate holiday clubs but in reality they are good for kids who will learn lots of life skills there as opposed to being stuck at home solitary and playing consoles.
Lol. My kids are adult and teens now so no worries about how they’ll turn out.
One is autistic and the clubs were definitely not good for her. The others just didn’t like them as much as being at home. They are not snowflakes just because they liked to have a lie in bed in their school holidays and have parents who listen to them. They’ve grown up to be resilient, independent, confident adults, who also happen to be very nice people.
But I mean, if being bitchy about other people’s kids is your thing, crack on. You sound like a very happy person. 👍
lapasion · 05/03/2023 14:24
9 year old should be fine. I’d get plenty of stuff organised for them to do though, otherwise they just end up on screens. I WFH and my eldest enjoys being on his own and getting to do projects like lego that he otherwise doesn’t have much time to do.
6 is still a bit young though. Would have been pushing it at that age, especially if trying to do something with lots of focus needed.
Don’t be afraid to ask for flexibility though. I think if your employer is already fine with WFH, they’ll be more likely to allow you to do the core meetings and then make up the time. Better that than having you juggle childcare while working.
PomPomChatton · 05/03/2023 14:25
I suggest that you spend a small proportion of what the holiday club would have cost on some new toys/crafts, whatever is their thing. It's lego in our house. They you can be ready to bring that out when they inevitably get bored. And if they don't, then you keep it for next time.
usernotfound0000 · 05/03/2023 14:25
At those ages, I would do an odd day but not the entire holidays, mainly because I think they'd get bored. Wouldn't they want to have a trip to the park or a day out? Mine are 8&4 and I've managed the odd day and they play nicely but they would get sick of each other if they were left for a week to entertain themselves.
Bunnycat101 · 05/03/2023 14:26
I think a couple of days would be ok but I wouldn’t plan for it. We’ve had a lot of sickness recently so I’ve been working at home with children off (with the consent of my manager) and I’ve found on day 1 the kids are delighted to get a lot of tv and largely ok not to disturb me. Day 2 and beyond it gets harder as they get bored. Yours are probably old enough to get on with it but it’s not necessarily good for them.
MuggleMe · 05/03/2023 14:27
My 9yo is absolutely fine being left while I WFH, she'll do a mix of audio book, TV and colouring etc. And my DH takes her to the park during his lunch hour. But only for an odd day a week. And I would never be able to do it if it was 9yo and 5yo. But luckily 5yo quite likes holiday club.
MzHz · 05/03/2023 14:27
TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl · 05/03/2023 13:48
😂my work certainly don’t they’re saving a fortune on overheads
WinterMusings · 05/03/2023 13:46
SoHereWeGo · 05/03/2023 13:41
And people wonder why employers want their staff back in the office....
And they’re going to save even more getting rid of you and getting someone else with no childcare conflicts to be many times more productive than you are.
it’s people like you who ruin wfh for many people and most of them will be women. It’s yet another reason NOT to employ women with children or of child bearing age.
you need a job, then be professional about it and get childcare in place.
DojaPhat · 05/03/2023 14:29
BlueHeelers · 05/03/2023 14:17
If I were one of your colleagues who paid for their child care, or didn't have children, I'd be very pissed off that basically, you're taking the mick.
This is exactly why you shouldn't overshare with colleagues. They aren't friends and will gladly e-mail HR with everything you've told them!
PrincessScarlett · 05/03/2023 14:29
9 year old possibly. But no way would I leave. 6 year old unsupervised. It's also unfair on your 9 year old to essentially have to babysit their younger sibling. For a one off then maybe, but if you are planning to do this every school holiday your poor kids and it absolutely takes the piss with your employer and work colleagues.
user1492757084 · 05/03/2023 14:35
For two or three days of the Easter holidays it could work out fine.
You will learn for next time.
Ordinarily I would not like to work with little ones also needing attention. Though this is not ongoing so for occasional days, it's worth a try. The worst that can happen is that you will let your work team down or the children will have a massive row..
mindutopia · 05/03/2023 14:38
I wfh with my 9 year old at home, but not my 5 year old. Older one is perfectly capable of entertaining herself for a day without much input from me. But No couldn’t do it with my younger one around. I also have a Dh who is self employed and home who can do the bulk of stuff during the day when I’m busy.
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