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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect her to pay?

32 replies

UsernameChang · 03/03/2023 21:45

Colleague went on a takeaway run for the staff team's lunch today. 7 of us and I gave the person doing the driving my card to pay. This has worked loads in the past for other things and they just transfer the money over. It's easier than having to do so many separate orders.

The colleague who went ordered and paid but then when she got back realised that her order was missing. She had been given the bag and not checked before driving away. It's about a 10 minute drive away so I suggested calling and explaining then going back but she couldn't be bothered.

I shared some of mine with her and so did another person. Then one person got the receipt and said they'd transfer x amount to me. Colleague said "Ah well I won't send you anything seeing as how I didn't get my order."

Another person straight away said it was her fault for not checking the order so she'd still need to pay and I said that was right and she owed me x amount. She thinks that I was unreasonable to expect her to pay when she didn't get what she paid for but I said that wasn't my fault and she had the opportunity to rectify it by going back with the receipt.

She then suggested that as she was the one who drove there everyone should cover the cost of her meal if we were so bothered. I said that she was being ridiculous and there was still plenty of time for her to get in touch with the restaurant and let them know the problem so she was choosing to waste her money, but she still had to pay and she owed me x amount, she has my bank details and I expect to be paid by this evening as usual.

It's under £15 so not as if it's a huge bill but I thought she was being a massive CF and that I shouldn't let this go. I'm planning to message tomorrow to remind her if it hasn't been paid. I've had a message from the staff member who also shared some of theirs with (potential) CF in our group chat to say she's paid and CF replied to ask her if she expected her to pay towards her food too as she shared it with her.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Namachanga · 03/03/2023 21:47

Of course she has to pay. You didn’t eat her food so why does she think you should pay for it?

BakedTattie · 03/03/2023 21:47

Yanbu.

she’s a cf

LittlePinkPill · 03/03/2023 21:49

YANBU.
Why does she expect you to fork out for her missing lunch? Bizarre.

Domino20 · 03/03/2023 21:51

Never ever prepay for something of hers again. Absolute CF.

SpringSparrow · 03/03/2023 21:51

Why don’t you or someone else go back to the restaurant and tell them the item was missing and get it taken off the bill? Given it’s your card, it makes sense for you to do it, why not ring them? They might be able to refund you over the phone? Once my husband picked up a takeaway and they rang him to say it was the wrong order and to go back and collect the correct order and they let him keep the wrong order as well. I expect the restaurant might even be aware that the item was missing.

BernadetteIsMySister · 03/03/2023 21:55

I mean from her point of view she did drive there and got everyone's food, came back and discovered she had nothing to eat and to top it off she has to still pay 😂

CheeseFiend40 · 03/03/2023 21:55

Couldn't either you or your colleague have rung the place to explain and just got a refund for the missing order?

VladmirsPoutine · 03/03/2023 21:59

I don't think yabu but then I think the entire set up was destined to fall apart one way or another. Putting everyone's order on your card and everyone paying you back their share sounds chaotic. I can see why she's annoyed at being asked to contribute her 'share' of the food which she didn't eat but if it wasn't that it would have been chasing someone up for £6.50 for weeks or a confusion over a 2 for 1 deal or a large vs small portion etc etc.

LivesOnPigeonStreet · 03/03/2023 22:23

Of course you are not going to pay for her meal just because she didn't check it was there. I would not offer my card again. Everyone should pay up front. I would say that as CF had refused to give you back the money she had spent on your card everyone must pay up front from now on.

Original poster
UsernameChang · 03/03/2023 22:24

It's always worked absolutely fine using my card, we often order from the same places so know the offers/deals on and how much things are. We take turns driving to get food too, usually have one Friday a month where we order something but sometimes will go to a drive through or to pick something else up.

I suppose one of us could have rang but her attitude of I can't be bothered and that means I don't have to pay made me not want to!

OP posts:
Beautiful3 · 03/03/2023 23:02

The card holder should have called up the restaurant to explain, theh would have refunded her meal. That would make everything square.

MisschiefMaker · 03/03/2023 23:03

YABU. You shouldn't have to pay for hers but it was your on your card, so you should have called ask asked for a refund. How can she do that if it wasn't on her card?

Also when it was clear she didn't have any food you all should have shared an equal amount with her so she had the same amount to eat as you, as a thank you for doing the driving. Did you do that? I know you said she had some but was she still left hungry?

Hankunamatata · 03/03/2023 23:05

You should have called restaurant about the missing meal - of course she shouldn't pay for a meal she didn't eat.

Suprima · 03/03/2023 23:07

Why on earth didn’t you just call up the restaurant and get the missing item refunded? If it wasn’t in the bag, that’s on them. This happens all of the time when bits of takeaways go missing.

what a load of drama when there is a very simple solution

TheCatterall · 03/03/2023 23:34

She pays you. She takes up the missing food with the restaurant. Simples.

it’s on her to sort out. Not to leave you out of pocket.

SheSaidHummingbird · 03/03/2023 23:35

Why not have the food delivered? Check the contents upon delivery then no chance for missing food.

cloudsandream · 03/03/2023 23:50

BernadetteIsMySister · 03/03/2023 21:55

I mean from her point of view she did drive there and got everyone's food, came back and discovered she had nothing to eat and to top it off she has to still pay 😂

This with bells all on it. This woman is being shit on in this thread and replies but she was arguably the most worst off in this whole scenario 😂

whynotwhatknot · 04/03/2023 00:15

all you had to do was call the takeaway andthey activate the refund will take a couple of days but would have been easier

she should have checked before she left yes

TyneTeas · 04/03/2023 00:22

How would you have dealt with it if it had been someone other than the person who collected it's food that was missing?

oviraptor21 · 04/03/2023 00:29

YABU. With seven people ordering she shouldn't have been expected to check everything was there. Once the error was discovered someone (probably easiest to be the person whose card was used or the person who originally placed the order.) should have phoned the restaurant.

LadyJ2023 · 04/03/2023 00:29

Sorry but it's the card holders responsibility should there be an error regarding any payments made. Should the lady who did not get her meal have rang they could not have verified the card number with her in order to process a refund anyway. I think these days it's rather foolish to use your own card for colleagues,acquaintances,friends and family even if you do think you know them very very well.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 04/03/2023 00:41

cloudsandream · 03/03/2023 23:50

This with bells all on it. This woman is being shit on in this thread and replies but she was arguably the most worst off in this whole scenario 😂

Show quote history

But why not take it up with the restaurant - you know, the business that was actually at fault? Why make it your colleagues’ fault instead?

HeddaGarbled · 04/03/2023 00:42

Ah, if I’d ordered, driven, collected and then didn’t get my meal, I’d be fed up. Of course she didn’t want to drive over there again. No one checks a whole bag of take out in the outlet to make sure nothing’s missing. Imagine how gutted she was when she unpacked it back at the office.

It was nice of you to share your meals with her, but it isn’t what she chose and wanted. And, yes, she should have phoned and got it taken off the bill, but some people are shy about stuff like that.

I’d roll my eyes, cut her some slack, and divi the cost of the missing meal up between all of you, out of sympathy, and gratitude for her bringing you all your meals.

SandyY2K · 04/03/2023 01:02

I think the cardholder should have called the Restaurant...BUT personally I would never give my card to ANYONE apart from my kids to pay for something.

It's a matter of security.

Spirini · 04/03/2023 08:51

I think you're being very mean OP.

I can't imagine this kind of drama in my work, you must really dislike this person!

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