Teachers in pjs on world book day

[AutisticLegoLover]

I'm not a fan as it is but we have just been greeted at the school door by the headteacher in his pjs and dressing gown. He usually wears a suit and looks professional. I know the children were to go in their pjs or a onesie but I did t expect staff, especially the HT, to be in nightwear. It feels over-familiar perhaps, for what if a better word. I'm not sure I'll look at him the same way again. I have a very low threshold for revulsion thanks to many, many sensory issues as part of being autistic and I don't always understand norms so I'm happy to be told I'm being unreasonable. I'd feel the same way if it was the past female HT too about the professionalism. Admittedly him being male makes a difference to my personal feelings due to trauma but from a professional point of view it doesn't sit right.

I think the thing you need to consider OP is that whilst this is how you feel (and your feelings are valid to you) it doesn't make it wrong and it doesn't mean it should change to appease you.

I don't actually like pjs for World Book Day - I get it works for those that lack time or money but I much prefer a costume, as does my child who would wear one everyday of the week if allowed.

I wouldn't have a problem with a child or an adult wearing PJs but I do think my kid would be disappointed not to wear a costume. I think it should be a mix depending on what is preferred by the individual.

Just to tip the balance as I agree with you! I already hate pyjama day for the kids, let alone grown ups wearing pyjamas! Gives me the ick massively. I don't want to see what you wear in bed, thank you. I know it's meant to be a bit of fun and I'm really not usually grumpy, but i can't get on board with this. It also feels dirty and unhygienic to me, kids coming to school in their PJ'S. I know they're most likely clean pyjamas, but I bet in some cases they aren't.

Also hate when colleagues work from home and I can see their bed in the background on video calls. I'm horrified on their behalf.

My DDs school was either uniform,wbd costume or pyjamas,there were 3 reasons pyjamas could be worn,1- if the kids didn't want to dress up,2- because school didn't want to put pressure on parents to feel obliged to spend money on a costume and 3- because lots of reading is done at bedtime when the kids are most likely in their pyjamas x

I have been here for years and am rarely taken aback but this is one of the nastiest threads I have ever seen. OP has a disability which makes it hard to understand a specific situation and she asked for help to rationalise it in terms of social norms. The ‘unclench’ / ‘you sound fun’ / ‘you’re a twat’ responses are absolutely appalling. Shame on a hell of a lot of you.

I didn't suggest anyone would die from it, or even that it shouldn't happen, just expressing that I personally don't like it, which I think is OK?

I don't mind pyjamas in the supermarket obviously as they're not being worn by someone I work with/the headteacher/people that I have a formal relationship with.

Yep, agree.

Added to which, she is clearly also working through a related trauma response and trying to unpick this from her difficulty understanding the social norms of the situation. She’s done and said absolutely nothing to deserve the vitriol of many posters.

Did you miss the bit where she said she's autistic and struggles with norms, and has difficulties with understanding this sort of thing? Try some compassion and understanding, you might suit it.

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t if you’re a teacher….

AutisticLegoLover

I think a few schools chose pyjamas/onesie theme so that people didn't have to pay out for costumes this year. Where I used to work we always kept a pile of loan items for the day for families so the children could join in. The home made costumes often won the prizes to show that it needn't cost much.

I know what you mean though it made me look at our boss in a different light in his onesie. 😯He was very tall and a little broad. I also have a memory of my village school Headteacher in a dress. He was Bill's New Frock. All the children in both cases thought it was hilarious, so that is what is important.

Also hate when colleagues work from home and I can see their bed in the background on video calls. I'm horrified on their behalf.
Please do explain to me how a bed is horrific.

🙄

OP's getting a lot of stick for her involuntary response to the Head being in nightwear, which is UNDERSTANDABLE in the context of her autism. It's not something you have much control over.

I'm not autistic (I have an autistic son) but this is surely not so hard to understand? As an aside, speaking as someone who ISN'T autistic but still has preferences about professionalism, I'd be ever so slightly iffy about all the teaching staff in their jammies at school. I'm sure they were wearing baggy Pjs and nothing inappropriate, but I view bedwear for adults as something that should be kept in the house, really. I don't like seeing adults wearing PJs or dressing gowns in supermarkets either. So in fact, for different reasons to the OP, I agree with her. I think it's not fantastically professional for teaching staff to be wearing nightwear in school, whether or not it's fancy dress, and there are presumably lots of other costumes they could be in. I know I'm in the minority here but that's how I'd feel about it.

Not related to OP – parents saying they'd lose respect for such a HT or that it's inappropriate boggle my mind! Surely parents prefer a passionate and involved educator (even if it's cringey) over someone who despises the nature of their own job?

I used to work in education. If a teacher/headteacher doesn't really bother participating in events and activities, at best they're a bit apathetic and distanced from the kids.

At worst, they resent the child/student-focused nature of their job (very common, often a result of burnout; in some cases it's always been that way due to few career options). They often put on a good show in front of the parents though, and act really involved and professional and even caring, but around just the kids the mask comes off.

I also actually think it's the epitome of professionalism to get on the students' level to excite them about literacy! Their job isn't corporate, it's to engage and educate the children.

She is not using her autism as an excuse ! it would explain the thinking ! She is being unreasonable, but doesn't need comments like this, just shows ur ignorance more than her unreasonableness (if that's a word!)

Wouldn't world book day have a point to it if they just gave the kids a book each? Don't get this dressing up thing at all. Seems to exist to stress parents out over having to do yet another thing.

Yep agreed, OP isn't proposing that she petitions the PTA and Governors to outlaw teachers in uniform. OP expected one thing and got caught off guard with something completely different. I think it just highlights some of the struggles of adults and children who present with "milder" ASD indicators that even when the OP and things updates set things out her position and acceptance that it's unreasonable but that was her feelings on the matter, she's still getting some OTT responses.

The PJ theme is encouraging bedtime reading, and it's fantastic for parents not to have organise special costumes.

That said, if I worked in a school, and was required to participate each year, I'd probably buy a traditional buttoned jacket and trousers pyjama set, and consider it part of my work wardrobe. Wearing my actual nightwear in the workplace, in front of colleagues and pupils, seems too personal, too intimate.

My children have been encouraged to go in dressed in pyjamas to represent the word “sleepy”. I think it’s a cop out to be honest. They have to be seen to do world book day but can’t be bothered…

I really feel like we can't fucking win, and I'm saying this as an autistic teacher with autistic children. Who teaches autistic kids.

I have worn pjs to school. I have worn fancy dress. Today I am Poison Ivy ffs. I'm also the DSL and if anything happens I will have to deal with it as a professional, despite the way I look. I've met with social workers dressed up. I've met with police. I've also put a child in an ambulance on halloween.

We also have students in pjs as an inclusive measure and there are staff in pjs.

We take part in these events to promote and encourage children. There are days where I will mask heavily so i can still be involved, despite feeling like I want to tear my own skin off.

I don't actually understand the point of the thread; maybe it is my autism. Today is fancy dress or pjs = headteacher can be in fancy dress or pjs.

YABU - I remember DD's normally very serious head teacher coming to school dressed as Angelina Ballerina. She looked brilliant and DD talked about it for days. Apparently she even did a little dance in assembly

DS's head was in a Spiderman onesie today and the normally very proper receptionist was in a very civilised set of PJs and dressing gown. Believe me the head didn't lose one ounce of authority in his onsie though since he's 6ft 2 I'm still wondering where on earth he found one long enough

It's a bit of fun - it will all be back to normal tomorrow